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complements are a form of kindness so one complement i get lot is people say my eyes are really pretty. when people say this it makes me happy, my sister has blonde hair and blue ish green eyes and i always felt “ugly” when by her because i have brown hair and hazel eyes with some green. but i remember in Florida for spring break this year in a forever 21 the cashier said i had beautiful eyes, and a class mate who sat in front of me just 2 week after i came back from Florida said i had interesting eyes but in a good way. he said that my eyes looked gold,brown and green a the same time. thoes little forms of kindness changed the way i think of my self and now i like my eyes and how they look gold in the sun, and almost black when i am in dark rooms, or when they look glossy when i wake up. 🙂
Kindness is not only an exercise shown toward me, but is something that truly moves me when it ushers me to care.
I wrote this piece earlier today as a reflection. I think it says KINDNESS.
Conversations in Quarantine: A little child shall lead them…
It’s everybody’s duty to give the world a reason to dance. -Kid President
I met a friend and her child yesterday. We big people sat in the park and sipped coffee and considered life’s challenging twists and turns. Her son climbed, jumped, and hugged trees, produced leaf mustaches, counted ducks, lay in the rich grass, and told kid jokes that caused us to groan.
Not socializing with children for over 18 months I’d forgotten how being themselves so fully they rush at life, tug and pester it until it plays back and then demand more from it.
Two days before, tracking the clifftop paths near my home, a first grader and kindergartener engaged in intermittent dashes overtook me. The older lad led the way. His younger brother clutched a teddy-bear and did his damnest to propel himself forward. They charged, then stopped to act out an orchestrated superhero pretend fight with each other, only to dash off with excited yelps again. As we turned one of the last corners near the end of the trail, a sprawling yacht club and jetty opened up before us. Junior yachters maneuvered themselves through the bay’s smooth waters. Dogs of all types with their equally eclectic owners enjoyed ball tosses as the winter sun sparkled on the sand and water. The youngsters came to an abrupt halt in front of me. Peering through the fence at the crystal blue and green sea, the biggest gasped, “Isn’t that beautiful!?” A whispered, “It’s so beautiful…” issued from his awed teeny companion. They stood silently still for a moment, then skipped along the trail anew.
SBS featured a news piece on the increasing number of Indonesian children orphaned by the pandemic last night. Panning on a small brown face of a ten-year-old boy wearing a too large mask. They informed us that his mother died a week ago. She was five months pregnant. His dad passed the following day. Because he is virus positive, he had to stay alone in his family shack. If cleared of the disease in three days, he’ll live with his grandparents. As he waited, he rode his bike, dug up the ground, and made make-believe games. A schoolgirl of similar age also forced to fend for herself was in foster care. She clutched at her school books and informed the reporter she wished to study hard and become a doctor so that her mom could be proud of her. Another pre-teen, dressed in full PPE, stood at the open graves of his parents. As the head of his family, he trembled and delivered the Muslim call to prayer.
The Thanksgiving Home in Nonthaburi, Thailand is a charity I have known intimately and supported for the past six years. The small family assists poor communities and also houses, schools, and provides training toward gainful employment for many adolescents with disabilities. They sent me a message a few hours ago, “We are in financial trouble. Which has forced us to move twice recently to reduce expenses. Because of lockdown we cannot collect boxes of donations. The children cannot go to school or the adults to work. The foreigners who previously supported us are unable as the pandemic also affected them. We have rent, but not enough money for food, water, or electricity. Please share our story with your friends so they can help…” I’ve just asked for their bank account details.
Talya, my daughter and her two sons, live in Australia. I have been here for over a year and still cannot visit them. I long to see them laugh, play, and wear me out climbing trees, or running along the beach together. I am concerned as they live in currently one of the worst outbreaks since the pandemic began. Each time we make plans, another lockdown ensues. Knowing that they are reasonably safe and have their basic needs well met removes a tremendous burden off of me, but a sadness remains.
Hopelessness and uncertainty have done a doozy on the world. I hate I have surrendered pieces of my bolder, carefree, faith-filled inner-child who always attacked “Can’t dos” with crazy creativeness. I understand why I orphaned her and why the pandemic’s reaches overwhelm all of us. But to appreciate the frolicking of children secure in the knowledge they are loveable, valuable, and thus freed to play gave me a soul-nudge. So did a greater awareness of the courage needed to carry burdens on young shoulders not broad enough to bear them.
Raucous roughhousing, toys and superheroes, friendship, and perception of nature in joyful bounds, the love of lost loved ones, promises to learn and repeat prayers, suffering lack, and yet the intention to soldier on. These large ranges of bleak and sunny colors splattered throughout pandemic affected children’s pallets paint their stories. Thank you, little teachers, for the admonition that amidst sudden outbreaks, there can be joy, fun-packed shadow boxing, and resilience to move through the impact of unbearable hardships, but there can also be great need from you. The repossession of our fragmented bits and nurturance of our inner child is not only for adult wellbeing, the recovery of our economies, or so we can go partying again, but to create safer, wiser spaces to hold you, our little ones, in. I hope we don’t fail you.
WHAT KINDNESSES HAVE I EXPERIENCED?
I am back in my hometown and had negative experiences here. I never really felt accepted, understood or taken seriously. Within my travels away from New York (fam & friends) I finally went forward with making my purpose my career. My new chosen career was not accepted. NOW being back, I have experienced so much UNDERSTANDING AND ACKNOWLEDGEMENT. Due to some new opportunities I have been anxious and tend to find so many individuals that want to assist and support me during those hard times. WHO KNEW; I thought I had to do it alone however with being honest I am building my TRIBE OF EMPOWERIST (individuals who empower themself first and others secondly all living creature).
I met someone who has truly and genuinely aided me, a complete stranger. My sister who I would have disagreements. My brother whom I rarely spoke to. Colleges and clients.
When I made my first genuine friend I was blown away by how caring they could be because I never experienced someone treating me with kindness before other than family members. One day I shared about my problems and they listened to what I had to say unbiasedly and without trying to judge me. I wasn’t used to it. What they had to say was really helpful. They care about me to this day which changed my life.
I’m a teacher and we have two new members on our team. I take the opportunity show kindness when I see that they are anxious. It’s a pay it forward from those who showed the kindness to me in my early days.
Today I found my lovely neighbor cleaning our community mailboxes. What a kind thing to do. She told me she has been doing it yearly for many years. I thanked her and feel so grateful for her kindness and presence in our community.
My father-in-law was in a horrible accident this week. I’m having trouble processing it and everything that’s happened since, but I find myself inundated with kindness. The kindness of the truckers who held my mother-in-law until help arrived, the kindness of the nurse who happened to be there, the kindness of all of our loved ones who are calling and bringing meals and asking how they can help. We are depending heavily on the kindness of others to get through this time.
I’m so sorry to hear about this accident, but glad there have been people around in your family’s hour of need. You and your family have my prayers.
Too many to mention
Today I experienced kindness from a school staff…which feel like a lot, given the year we already seem to be having.
I”ve also had incredibly thoughtful friends send cards, text, gifts- just because. My daughter is learning to be inciteful with asking for help when she sees that I’m overwhelmed. My son has moments of kindness…fewer and farther between than my daughter, but we’re getting there.
This summer, my parents took me on four different trips: one to camp in Beulah, CO; one to visit tourist attractions in Boston, MA; one to visit tourist attractions in Oahu, HA; and one to move back into my apartment in St. Louis, MO. I didn’t pay a dime for any of these trips, other than what I bought with my own money at gift shops. My cat also cuddles on my lap a lot, which I find so adorable! He’s a very therapeutic, friendly cat.
My kitten ( who is getting very big) greets me with kindness everyday. He is a constant source of joy and solace for me. I have been trying to move and as I share my findings with family, I am greeted with negativity and speculation if I don’t comply with their limited beliefs of security and practicality. They tend to see what’s not possible. It’s hard for me to stay afloat. I found something that is over the top and I’m waiting for the property manager to get back to me. I see the place I like as a source of inspiration and beauty beyond what I could have imagined with all the trimmings. I only told my sister about it and she was not supportive. When I hear her say “do what you want if you think you can afford it”, in a negative tone it cuts me to the core. I don’t react with words but I feel the lack of support. She is the only friend I have right now and its hard to hear how sour she is. So I will not share any thing else with the rest of my family that seem to hear only what would work for them. Criticism is something that I have a hard time tolerating. It’s been hard to trust myself and hear God whisper encouraging words. I’m having trouble with spreading my wings but I trust that the process is in flow. I’m hopefully heading in the right direction or on the verge of a nervous breakdown. I’ve come through lots of obstacles from a difficult past and I want to move forward with joy and enthusiasm. I could use some positive energy in my direction. Thanks
Thanks for sharing. I have been there with the lack of support from family. Personally it began to push me to a place where I was my own cheerleader and became open to the family outside of family for support and the objective listening ears. In regard to breaking down…try being in tune to your feelings and as those rotted & troublesome pieces that are wearing on you are removed seek out the much needed pieces that build you. I became very quiet on my family. They all quickly begin to notice the distance & silence. They now are careful with how they share how they feel and respect my individuality. I send a double quadruple dose of energy your way.
Thank you so much Amber! I hear you and feel you. I can’t seek approval from my family. Their lifestyle and mine are not comparable. It does not have to be a judgment issue. That’s where I fall short. I now let go of asking for input from my family out of love. We have seldom seen eye to eye on many life issues that does not make anyone better or worse. We are different and that is ok. I will be cautious of sharing in the future. Thank you for your energy sent my way. I’m feeling much better. I decided to take steps where I live to make it more to my liking and stopped looking to move. The place that I loved is really expensive and the realtor has not returned my calls anyway. If I get to see it I may reconsider. I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it. In the meantime I’m cleaning and downsizing and preparing for when the time is right to move. I trust the process of change and the timing is out of my hands.
Trust your self, Toni. Their words come from love of you and wishing to wrap you up in soft blankets your whole life, but their words say more about their fears and not of your true ability. You can do this. I think it’s exciting. I wish you all the best.
Thanks Holly! The realtor still hasn’t gotten back to me. I’m not sure what’s what. Thank you for your encouragement please continue to send some energy my way. I want to live my best life and I don’t want anything to hold me back.
All of the best in your move – it’s hard when you don’t get support from those you most need it from. I’ve made some decisions in life my family didn’t support – stand firm in your own goodness and wisdom.
Thanks Rita! I’ve been independent all my life and I don’t want to stop now. I’ve made some huge mistakes that took me a long time to recover from. I will have to trust my gut and take my chances. I can’t live anyone else’s life. I’ve been praying for courage to do just that!
I smiled when I read the question. I took a short walk early this morning and I was not stepping to high. I met a young man on the road and I said, “Good Morning.” He responded, “Good Morning, God bless you.” His voice was strong but gentle. He could tell that my steps took effort. His kind words were a blessing that will lift me up all day.
How sweet! 🙂 I’m glad you got out today, Carol. Our weather was beautiful here today, I hope yours was, too.
Holly, It was lovely here–not hot and not cold!
Mentors sharing sage advice.
I have received the kindness of a friendly wave from a neighbor while out on my morning walk. I have received words of positive affirmation from those that express how I inspire them. I complimented someone dear to me on a beautiful dress – she is gifting me that very dress and another one that is blue. I purpose to practice kindness regularly so I’m blessed when many many return the kindness especially in times of a problem.
Every day I experience kindness from my wife and kitty. We are not that active socially, but I am a member of our local Threshold Choir, And our singing for people in the final stages of life is all about compassion and kindness.
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