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I just read this and it resonates with me:
Three Expectations That Will Change Your Life · 1. Expect imperfection in relationships · 2. Expect imperfection in situations · 3. Expect perfection only from God.
The question for me is, “What might life expect of me?” Whether that lands as fewer or more expectations is probably not that relevant.
I am going to approach life with fewer expectations in terms of my relationships. I have set really high expectations in terms of how I want my relationship dynamics to grow with out acknowledging that all these tight restrictions are not allowing my relationships to flow freely. I want more free relationships where I am connecting with people because of the attraction of energy and not based upon transactional tasks, etc. I am also going to try to loosen expectations for events in the future. I like to get caught up in my head and fantasize how things will go, good or bad. I am at the point where I am just trying to move with intention and living in the present moment rather than get so caught on how I want things to be that I become upset when it does not turn out how I desire.
May be it now is possible to let go of deep seated fear after having finally accepted and faced it and to finally be able to let go of. Fear being replaced by trust and open space for the good things to happen. Guessing that this could replace expectations related to the “I” also. As PKR said, it is the same with me – it is work in progress. Happy and deeply grateful to be in this process, too, and this has only been possible with so much help, of dear friends, loved ones, you all here, and of course, life itself also. If we are all together in this, all is as it should be for all, in awareness of this precious life in our most beautiful world. Idealism? May be, but as we are creating our own world, which we perceive, and then live in, why not design a beautiful one all together? Again from my heart. A poem of Hafiz comes to mind, reciting it again, if you don´t mind.
“With That Moon Language”
Everyone you see, you say to them,
Of course you do not do this out loud;
Someone would call the cops.
Still though, think about this,
This great pull in us
Why not become the one
Who lives with a full moon in each eye
That is always saying,
With that sweet moon
What every other eye in this world
Is dying to
Beautiful poem, thank you for sharing. I especially liked the visual of the line ‘who lives with a full moon in each eye’ 🌕
I am trying hard not to have many expectations, especially of others. I have been so hurt, disappointed by others because of my expectations I had for them. I have learned and am learning to only place expectations on myself. I think it was Pema Chodron who clued me in to have no expectations & to release attachments. It is a process & I am a work in progress.
Remembering to observe myself. Observation teaches me the true nature of expectations. Which (for me) often results in impatience, discontent, selfishness. This reminder of how detrimental expectations can be helps me to let go of them. Observation is also the mechanism by which I’m able to notice when I’m falling into the trap of expecting, it can be a bit sneaky sometimes. 🙂
I have never expected much from
Maybe it’s the gift of depression.
Maybe it’s growing up the youngest
My current mantra of seeing
things clearly without projection or
judgment, is also helping me to keep
my expectations of others in check.
Trying to accept thing as they are,
with gratitude, is also helping.
This is a hard question to respond to. Maybe I am “too much flow with the flow, person.” My expectation is to have the strength and knowledge to move forward in the best way. I have often told my boys, ” do the best you can in the situation with the knowledge you have on hand. In the end deal with the consequences. If the outcome was favorable, Rejoice. If the outcome was not so good what was the lesson learned. “
I approach life with fewer expectations by doing my best to practice the Presence. Honestly, I have realized that the moment whether it be filled with joy or sorrow is all I can handle. I follow Pema Chodron’s advice: “Let go and observe without judgement.” A few days ago, I shared a poem I wrote several years ago called “That’s Life.” The line that struck a chord with many of you was: “Expectations are judgements in disguise. ” I have found that to be true in my life.
I am twenty-eight years old now. And if I could live in the age of one hundred or something, I would still not be able to live forever. Why should I expect so much in this life? Focusing on what I am doing is better than what I am desiring for. Remember when I live in my home country, I encountered an old woman, who sale fruits on the street and another old woman, she was my neighbor. The fruit-sale woman talked to me with joyfulness and happiness even though she was not having enough materials in her life. My neighbor on the other hand, living in a three-story house with a big master bedroom, told me many things that affect her life in stress. From two people, two different settings. I learn that don’t expect so much and don’t gain too much in this material life is the way to live in gratefulness.
You are very wise. Thus is a good model for living whole. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
I think that it is healthy to have some expectations of oneself for their life….things to move them ahead…physically, emotionally and spiritually. However expectations of life in general can bring some disapointments…the way the world is right now- gives me pause. I am so thankful for all who come to this site daily…thank you for always sharing your thoughts and your wisdom.
I need to be grateful for every day and every day to my best for that day. I need to immediately forgive myself when I make a mistake and ensure that I continue to forge on with my life and the gifts God has bestowed upon me.
By trusting the process.
Pondering this question takes me back to one from a few days ago. As I continue to recognize & resist “ruminating,” I am discovering a new path into lower/ fewer expectations, particularly of myself.
By asking myself what I can offer rather than what I want to receive.
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