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Difficulties in my life have shaped my experience of resilience.
First of all I want to tell you what the definition of resilience is. Okay so Resilience is the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties; toughness..
I have had lots of difficulties n my life such as struggling in school, emotional abuse and verbal abuse.
I have also always felt that my parents and relatives never really thought highly of me.
These difficulties just make me want to dig deeper and be a bad ass in the world. I want to prove everyone wrong and show people that I am someone powerful.
I feel that with each step, I remain in belief of the spirit within me and take another step. Full of spiritual gratitude. Yet often everything becomes unbearable and I cry out of self pity.
I didn’t bounce back. I bounced differently. And over time I realised that this was growth. So in any difficult time I tell myself that something interesting will come of it. Now my difficulties have not been the tragedies that some face and I don’t know what bounce happens in the face of those.
I’m so grateful not to have the problems of my past. It makes my present life much more fun.
Standing back up is more important than ruminating over the cause of the fall.
A timely question for me especially today. The “difficulty” or challenge this past year has been to suddenly have to move. It was daunting and overwhelming. I found through this experience, that I am capable of doing more than thought I could, if I am determined. Along with resilience is the willingness to ask for help. That helps!
They have taught me that I am responsible for myself. If I mess up, no one will be there to help clean up my mistakes. They have taught me to lower expectations.
First, I learned the power of my language. “I had several failed businesses” is not the same as “I am a failure.” The latter is disempowering. The previous resonates as a what’s so, what did we learn, and let’s just try again. Second, abusive relationships taught me that I’m a survivor. This translates in other areas of life in terms of grit, self worth, and self respect. To be able to look at my reflection and say, “You are loved. I believe in you” can still make me teary eyed. Lastly, I’m learning the exponential power of sharing. I can recognize signs of distraught in others (because I went through the same thing). So, I offer help. A listening ear. Comfort. Encouragement. Reassurance “Hey, you’re not alone.” I learned partnership helps build and reinforce resilience and strength for both parties.
Some of what you express resonates with me. I am still reminded by my younger daughter that it is my fault for her suffering tge after events of the divorce. I don’t have to believe it yet direct words are hurtful. Take care.
I am learning that what looked like resilience during COVID may not have been as long lasting as I hoped. I’m realizing now that I had stuffed or ignored a lot of frustration, sadness, anger, etc in favor of trying to be patient, resilient and positive. Some of those feelings are coming to the surface now, and I’m faced with dealing with those while trying to be resilient during this new challenge.
As there was too much of resilience needed already very early in life in order to survive, difficulties led to humbly accept whatever life brings, reduced my sometimes instinctive reactions of resilience, being transformed into replies to whatever life offers and helped me to overcome deep seated depression. So when I am sad sometimes, I can see and feel His Love, which is always there; in the sunshine, in nature, in the love of my friends. Overcoming the difficulties allowed changing perspective, most of the time. What´s left is work in progress… 🙂
Difficulties have made more clear for me where are the sources of true strength, where the foundation and beams of life are as opposed to the drywall and decorations. Put simply, it is my faith in God and purpose that forms my foundation and the relationships and people that make up the beams.
Difficulties have shaped my experience of resilience like a corner, we’re literally backed into a corner where there is no longer a roomy field of options and choices we might’ve enjoyed previously. As with irrational numbers that gradually diminish, becoming smaller and smaller the further the divisions stray from the decimal but never end, I’m reminded that we have and are everything just not everything at once.
I agree. Often, we have to acknowledge the minuteness of our existence. That too can become a corner or a circle. 🎈🎈
Hardships have taught me how to lean heavily on God. When I lost my son 22 yrs ago this month to a drowning accident, my primary question was, “How will I ever survive this?” Miraculously, day by excruciating day, I survived. That experience alone taught me, I can survive anything. It wont be pleasant, but it is possible, and life does get beautiful again.
Oh DeVonna. How awful.
I’m glad, at least, that he was alive once, and loved so much, and is remembered. And very glad that you survived and that I have had a chance to know you today.
My greatest difficulty today is the passing of my dear husband 3 months ago. Yet I’m learning how to continue life on my own in a new way. I’m strengthened by the fact that we always shared our faith together and grew together from that experience. I feel blest from the 60 years we had together and strengthened by that memory. Life is a gift.
Condolences to you on the loss of your husband. 60 yrs together is amazing:)
I am so sorry for your loss, dear Eileen. May dear family, friends and His Love surround you, hold you and be with you always. All blessings may be with you on your path. Warmly, Ose
How kind of you to reply. Thankyou.
I can only begin to imagine you grief. Each step, each breach takes you to another level of strength and life. God bless you on this journey. I am so incredibly sorry for your loss.
thank you Katrina.
Dear Eileen, my sincerest condolences to you in the loss of your dear husband. Sixty years of marriage…wow, what a blessing and a rare priviledge. I prayed for you, just now.
Life has/ had it challenges. From growing up in a dysfunctional family that has created depression and anxiety to the current pandemic which has created pressures and challenges. During my life experiences I am also learning life skills to deal with these issues, to confront, feel and accept them as life lessons. This is a life lesson and is ongoing. My experiences show me how resilient and strong I am.
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