I consider myself a very resilient person and have adapted to all kinds of things in my life. The big one I always point to is when I got laid off from my job as a proofreader/librarian at a daily newspaper. I thought that I would work there for a long time, climbing up in the ranks and becoming a famous local writer. Haha. That did not happen of course, the newspaper downsized in 2005 and I went to work in the public relations area of the dot com world. I made a lot of money during that career shift, but destroyed my soul. Eventually I ended up dumping the internet business, teaching English overseas and loving my life. COVID changed all of that and here I am, back at home, reinventing myself one more time. I’m kind of afraid of the workplace environment I will face once I get my nursing licence, but at least I have the freedom to leave any job that I don’t like. Luckily, that one job I had back in the dot com bubble gave me the nest egg I need to be able to withstand almost anything this uncaring global economy throws at me.
25 years ago I almost died from non-Hodgkin lymphoma. I had to adapt. I accepted that I could die. The gift I had was that I wasn’t in pain. I try to work acceptance today.
That’s a pretty big thing to go through when you are young,
dear Christina . . .
it happened to my niece when she was 19,
and I think
it changed her forever.
Going through it as you did
you must know now
that you are a strong woman. ♥
I hope you have had adequate support for that,
dear Yram . . .
caregiving,
especially with one you love
is heart rending.
I think often
of when you were going through that
with your husband
with love . . . ♥
The experiences that forced me to slow down and re-evaluate have led to the greatest strength and adaptability. Moving through injuries, illness, deaths of loved ones, estrangements, and identity loss have all compelled me to rebuild from within. Each time, I become more humble, open, curious, and also confident. Difficulty as invitation to alchemy, perhaps.
Coming here,
dear Drea,
hearing the stories of others,
reminds me of a quote,
whose author has been disputed . . .
“Be kind,
for everyone is fighting a hard battle.” ♥
So many!
Winning an election.
Winning another one.
Losing one.
Winning another one.
Losing another one.
Divorce #1, as a self-employed mother of two toddlers.
Divorce #2, with teenagers and the realization that fundamental incompatibilities weren’t ever going to change.
Marriage #3, 19 years heading toward 20 now, and all the challenges that go with living into love and growing older with someone.
The various trials and tribulations of my daughters.
Taking on big career changes that both excited and intimidated me.
As an adult, moving from Post Falls, Idaho, to Coeur d’Alene, to Spokane, Washington, to Seattle, to Olympia, where I plan to stay for good.
My mother’s dementia.
Breaking an elbow in a bike crash.
Breaking a wrist in a trip and fall incident. (Pro tip: Don’t back up without looking behind yourself for obstacles.)
A home remodel that took nearly 6 months and involved living in two different short-term rentals, during which time I had another bike crash (black ice under snow) and sprained my knee.
Many, many things about doing my job under the current federal administration.
Going from being a student in improv classes to performing on stage in front of audiences.
Living with my aging body.
Life, basically!
I would say the biggest one was my divorce after 35 years of marriage. I wrote a poem which I have shared here before but the poem did not come until several years after the event. That said, it has definitely strengthened my capacity to adapt in the face of challenges. I’ve learned that Life is trustworthy and so am I.
A Time to Let Go by Carol Ann Conner
What is grief?
But a passage — a letting go
that comes draped in confusion
and seems too harsh for me to face
without protection.
But protection doesn’t come
as the anger of loss pulses
through my body
like a fire raging out of control,
a fire that can only be contained
if accepted and felt.
The internal storm begins.
A primal scream
fuels the burning flames.
I smolder like a chard building
stark against the horizon.
My shelter gone,
I bargain with my ghosts,
with bolts of emotional lightning
that I am convinced
are trying to destroy me.
I desperately look
for a place to hide.
Finally, I surrender.
I seek haven in my humanity,
clinging to the dust of creation.
A gentle rain of tears begins to fall
and I release my pain.
Embracing life’s cleansing ritual,
I look at my wound.
I grant it permission to heal.
Peering into the mist
of new beginnings,
I sense that I am not alone,
Just lonely and afraid
as I start all over again.
This time
I will embrace willingness
instead of willfulness.
Love instead of fear.
Life instead of death.
Only then will the path widen,
the storms cease,
and the fires light
the way
to my new home.
This poem is reflective of my own journey, of my capacity for denial, for fighting and fleeing from life when I experience loss, even though every religious discipline teaches us to flow, to let go, to release our hurt so it can be transformed and provide us with renewed energy for whatever life still holds for us. Now, in the winter of my own life, I am thankful for the awareness letting go brings. I know that my job is willingness. When I am truly willing, life dances me, romances me, and helps me pack and unpack, sort what is worth keeping and let go of what is not life-giving. For this I am most grateful.
Carol Ann, the line about willingness over willfulness stands out to me. There’s a lady onthe Soothing Pod App Ngoc introduced me back in 2023 from a meditation exercise where she has a line of “Whatever I resist persists.”
I was Vietnam’s national athlete. That was the most beautiful time of my life. This experience taught me about resiliency, patience, and teamwork. Plus, living with other athletes under the same training school was an opportunity to improve my capacity for adaptation. We shared public spaces and took care of our own stuff. I’m glad I had this experience while I was quite young.
Sometimes,
dear Ngoc,
fame or notoriety that comes when we are young,
casts a pall on the future . . .
this happened to my son,
who gained status when he was a child,
and it is hard for him
now that he is ‘just’ an ordinary human being.
I am grateful for who you are today. ♥
Ngoc’s extended out of town absence strengthened my capacity to adapt in the face of challenges. I learned to trust my root people and developed social connections.
Both my first divorce and then the unexpected end of my relationship with my finance. I had to start over both times – relied on inner strength.
Wishing everyone a peaceful relaxing Sunday.
https://nationaltoday.com/sisters-day/ – I don’t have a sister, but enjoyed sending this to my girls who are having a sibling adventure in Costa Rica rn.
Everything has helped me to become more flexible to adapt to changes. I’m still a work in progress and I fall often flat on my face and I try to dust myself off and get back up again. Somethings take more time than others. Thank you .
Oh boy, so many of them! Running events, my divorce, multiple moves. Managing a business, whether my own or someone else’s, and now managing a yoga studio. Also, the healing modalities I have been utilizing over the years.
I think every move to a new place has helped me adapt to change. Each age brought challenges, feelings and learning how to start again. I think lost friendships and natural “ outgrowing” people and things have helped me adapt and grow.
A life is always faced with challenges. That is how it is. From bristlecone pines high above timberline to small rodents, including humankind. One such life lesson was herding a band of 1000 ewes on horseback for 3 years. “80”, “81” & “82”. My capacity to adapt to the challenges of living life out of doors, with a canvas wall tent and small wood stove for cooking and warmth, for extended periods, moving camp with pack horses and two donkeys, made young Joseph comfortable and content. It was more difficult for me to re-adapt to rural life when we trailed the sheep and lambs back to the valley for sorting and marketing of the lambs. To this day I look at that period of challenges, life, fondly. Even the foul weather days.
Peace, Love & Light.
Challenges like that,
early in life,
dear Joseph,
have built a firm foundation of self-sufficiency in you.
I know they were filled with hard work,
pain, and deprivation . . .
the life of a cowboy.
This song
always gives me a thought of you . . . https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8QIlRt_c2ik ♥
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I consider myself a very resilient person and have adapted to all kinds of things in my life. The big one I always point to is when I got laid off from my job as a proofreader/librarian at a daily newspaper. I thought that I would work there for a long time, climbing up in the ranks and becoming a famous local writer. Haha. That did not happen of course, the newspaper downsized in 2005 and I went to work in the public relations area of the dot com world. I made a lot of money during that career shift, but destroyed my soul. Eventually I ended up dumping the internet business, teaching English overseas and loving my life. COVID changed all of that and here I am, back at home, reinventing myself one more time. I’m kind of afraid of the workplace environment I will face once I get my nursing licence, but at least I have the freedom to leave any job that I don’t like. Luckily, that one job I had back in the dot com bubble gave me the nest egg I need to be able to withstand almost anything this uncaring global economy throws at me.
You are right Louise. The global economy has no feelings.
25 years ago I almost died from non-Hodgkin lymphoma. I had to adapt. I accepted that I could die. The gift I had was that I wasn’t in pain. I try to work acceptance today.
Glad you’re here, Christina.
That’s a pretty big thing to go through when you are young,
dear Christina . . .
it happened to my niece when she was 19,
and I think
it changed her forever.
Going through it as you did
you must know now
that you are a strong woman. ♥
I would have to say caregiving.
I hope you have had adequate support for that,
dear Yram . . .
caregiving,
especially with one you love
is heart rending.
I think often
of when you were going through that
with your husband
with love . . . ♥
The experiences that forced me to slow down and re-evaluate have led to the greatest strength and adaptability. Moving through injuries, illness, deaths of loved ones, estrangements, and identity loss have all compelled me to rebuild from within. Each time, I become more humble, open, curious, and also confident. Difficulty as invitation to alchemy, perhaps.
Coming here,
dear Drea,
hearing the stories of others,
reminds me of a quote,
whose author has been disputed . . .
“Be kind,
for everyone is fighting a hard battle.” ♥
Very true, Sparrow.
So many!
Winning an election.
Winning another one.
Losing one.
Winning another one.
Losing another one.
Divorce #1, as a self-employed mother of two toddlers.
Divorce #2, with teenagers and the realization that fundamental incompatibilities weren’t ever going to change.
Marriage #3, 19 years heading toward 20 now, and all the challenges that go with living into love and growing older with someone.
The various trials and tribulations of my daughters.
Taking on big career changes that both excited and intimidated me.
As an adult, moving from Post Falls, Idaho, to Coeur d’Alene, to Spokane, Washington, to Seattle, to Olympia, where I plan to stay for good.
My mother’s dementia.
Breaking an elbow in a bike crash.
Breaking a wrist in a trip and fall incident. (Pro tip: Don’t back up without looking behind yourself for obstacles.)
A home remodel that took nearly 6 months and involved living in two different short-term rentals, during which time I had another bike crash (black ice under snow) and sprained my knee.
Many, many things about doing my job under the current federal administration.
Going from being a student in improv classes to performing on stage in front of audiences.
Living with my aging body.
Life, basically!
I would say the biggest one was my divorce after 35 years of marriage. I wrote a poem which I have shared here before but the poem did not come until several years after the event. That said, it has definitely strengthened my capacity to adapt in the face of challenges. I’ve learned that Life is trustworthy and so am I.
A Time to Let Go by Carol Ann Conner
What is grief?
But a passage — a letting go
that comes draped in confusion
and seems too harsh for me to face
without protection.
But protection doesn’t come
as the anger of loss pulses
through my body
like a fire raging out of control,
a fire that can only be contained
if accepted and felt.
The internal storm begins.
A primal scream
fuels the burning flames.
I smolder like a chard building
stark against the horizon.
My shelter gone,
I bargain with my ghosts,
with bolts of emotional lightning
that I am convinced
are trying to destroy me.
I desperately look
for a place to hide.
Finally, I surrender.
I seek haven in my humanity,
clinging to the dust of creation.
A gentle rain of tears begins to fall
and I release my pain.
Embracing life’s cleansing ritual,
I look at my wound.
I grant it permission to heal.
Peering into the mist
of new beginnings,
I sense that I am not alone,
Just lonely and afraid
as I start all over again.
This time
I will embrace willingness
instead of willfulness.
Love instead of fear.
Life instead of death.
Only then will the path widen,
the storms cease,
and the fires light
the way
to my new home.
This poem is reflective of my own journey, of my capacity for denial, for fighting and fleeing from life when I experience loss, even though every religious discipline teaches us to flow, to let go, to release our hurt so it can be transformed and provide us with renewed energy for whatever life still holds for us. Now, in the winter of my own life, I am thankful for the awareness letting go brings. I know that my job is willingness. When I am truly willing, life dances me, romances me, and helps me pack and unpack, sort what is worth keeping and let go of what is not life-giving. For this I am most grateful.
I love your poem – thank you for sharing again.
”Just lonely and afraid
as I start all over again.”
Hello,
sister of my heart . . .
I have felt this way many times in my life,
dear Carol Ann. ((( ♥ )))
Carol Ann, the line about willingness over willfulness stands out to me. There’s a lady onthe Soothing Pod App Ngoc introduced me back in 2023 from a meditation exercise where she has a line of “Whatever I resist persists.”
Thank you Carol. Your sharing is profound.
Parenting. Work.
I was Vietnam’s national athlete. That was the most beautiful time of my life. This experience taught me about resiliency, patience, and teamwork. Plus, living with other athletes under the same training school was an opportunity to improve my capacity for adaptation. We shared public spaces and took care of our own stuff. I’m glad I had this experience while I was quite young.
Sometimes,
dear Ngoc,
fame or notoriety that comes when we are young,
casts a pall on the future . . .
this happened to my son,
who gained status when he was a child,
and it is hard for him
now that he is ‘just’ an ordinary human being.
I am grateful for who you are today. ♥
My Ngoc, teamwork extends off the field as well. Athletes are living under the same roof. There’s backstage politics. It’s the game within the game.
That’s amazing! What sport(s)?
Ngoc’s extended out of town absence strengthened my capacity to adapt in the face of challenges. I learned to trust my root people and developed social connections.
Both my first divorce and then the unexpected end of my relationship with my finance. I had to start over both times – relied on inner strength.
Wishing everyone a peaceful relaxing Sunday.
https://nationaltoday.com/sisters-day/ – I don’t have a sister, but enjoyed sending this to my girls who are having a sibling adventure in Costa Rica rn.
I have sisters, Michele, and consider my sister-in-law a bonus sister. Thanks for posting the day!
Everything has helped me to become more flexible to adapt to changes. I’m still a work in progress and I fall often flat on my face and I try to dust myself off and get back up again. Somethings take more time than others. Thank you .
Agreed,
dear Antoinette. ♥
Oh boy, so many of them! Running events, my divorce, multiple moves. Managing a business, whether my own or someone else’s, and now managing a yoga studio. Also, the healing modalities I have been utilizing over the years.
I think every move to a new place has helped me adapt to change. Each age brought challenges, feelings and learning how to start again. I think lost friendships and natural “ outgrowing” people and things have helped me adapt and grow.
My therapist has definitely given me tools.
Deann, buddy systems change overtime. It’s man made.
A life is always faced with challenges. That is how it is. From bristlecone pines high above timberline to small rodents, including humankind. One such life lesson was herding a band of 1000 ewes on horseback for 3 years. “80”, “81” & “82”. My capacity to adapt to the challenges of living life out of doors, with a canvas wall tent and small wood stove for cooking and warmth, for extended periods, moving camp with pack horses and two donkeys, made young Joseph comfortable and content. It was more difficult for me to re-adapt to rural life when we trailed the sheep and lambs back to the valley for sorting and marketing of the lambs. To this day I look at that period of challenges, life, fondly. Even the foul weather days.
Peace, Love & Light.
Challenges like that,
early in life,
dear Joseph,
have built a firm foundation of self-sufficiency in you.
I know they were filled with hard work,
pain, and deprivation . . .
the life of a cowboy.
This song
always gives me a thought of you . . .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8QIlRt_c2ik ♥
All life experiences have strengthened me to adapt to challenges.