Many times. Sometimes I will be sitting on the sofa feeling sad. Then I will look to the right and see the staircase and then think about my home and the fact that I have a home. I’ll look around and see my furniture and think how well it has served me as well as family and friends who have gathered in my home. I will usually see a few of my four cats and immediately feel love and gratefulness for their sweetness as well as their persnicketiness. Yes, their persnicketiness, too. Lol
I have much to feel grateful for and that does make me happy.
Peace to all on this Saturday.
This reminds me of a post or word for the day I read here a while ago…joy is the emotion that doesn’t depend on happiness.
Yet I do find when I am grateful, there is a deep sense of joy – and sometimes that produces a feeling of happiness too.
Many many years ago I read somewhere that happiness is a choice. This bit of wisdom resonated with me on a very deep level & stayed with me. I chose happiness in the midst of much turmoil in my marriage, in my life, in the world.
I found having an “attitude of gratitude” contributed to my happiness.
Being in a state of gratitude makes me happy.
I have made a choice to be happy.
And along with my happiness comes my gratitude for All.
Being grateful & happy are my intentions.
Thank you Br. David for your wisdom, kindness, compassion, generosity. 🙏🏻
🕊️♥️
Something about this question makes me feel as if there’s an expectation that gratitude leads to happiness. Gratefulness is what it is, for its own sake. It doesn’t have to produce anything..
Sometimes my gratefulness is on the quiet side. This morning I’m grateful for fresh, hot coffee that my sweetheart made for me in our usual routine. I didn’t move to, “Oh, I’m happy!”; I sat with the appreciation.
If I’m outdoors and feeling grateful for the beauty around me I often feel an uplift of energy. That’s as much from being outside and paying attention as it is from gratefulness directly. Things that I note as moments of delight are delightful for me with or without a specific pause for gratitude.
The other day I saw an eagle soar overhead. I’m so grateful to live where bald eagles fly and yes, seeing one makes me happy. And today being Saturday makes me feel both grateful and happy for sure. I have the gift of time.
When I read today’s question, I thought I don’t know that gratefulness has ever made me happy. I say that because for me, happy has never been an easy word to define. I lean more toward the word, joy. Gratefulness has helped me to find myself filled with joy from time to time but mostly gratefulness has helped me stop fighting and fleeing from what is. I read this meditation from Miribai Starr this morning on Richard Rohr’s site and I found myself smiling, feeling real, being grateful for the “Yes” gratefulness has brought into my life. 🙂
Saying Yes to Our Lives
Mirabai Starr recounts how she came to say yes to God in her life as it is instead of how she imagined it should be:
All my life, I have been enamored of the God-intoxicated ones. Those rarified souls who slip into ecstatic states and spontaneously utter poetry. The ones who exude deep stillness, embody equanimity, listen more than they speak. The initiated and the ordained, the monastics…. I wanted to be one of them. Until I didn’t.
I want you not to want that as well…. I want you to want to be exactly who you are: a true human person doing their best to show up for this fleeting life with a measure of grace, with kindness and a sense of humor, with curiosity and a willingness to not have all the answers, with reverence for life.
You do not need to chant all night in a temple in the Himalayas. You don’t have to be the newest incarnation of Mary Magdalene. It is not necessary to read or write spiritual books. You are not required to know the difference between Mahayana and Theravada Buddhism or memorize the Beatitudes. All you have to do to walk the path of the ordinary mystic is to cultivate a gaze of wonder and step onto the road. Keep walking. Rest up, and walk again. Fall down, get up, walk on. Pay attention to the landscape. To the ways it changes and the ways it stays the same. Be alert to surprises and turn with the turning of the seasons. Honor your body, train your mind, and keep your heart open against all odds. Say yes to what is, even when it is uncomfortable or embarrassing or heartbreaking. Hurl your handful of yes into the treetops and then lift your face as the rain of yes drops its grace all over you, all around you, and settles deep inside you.
Reference: Mirabai Starr, Ordinary Mysticism: Your Life as Sacred Ground (HarperOne, 2024), 214–215.
I am truly just pondering out load here… but I have noticed that several responses today are struggling with the “happy”… I know I almost discarded it for the day when I first read happy.
Are we not allowing ourselves to be happy? Why are we uncomfortable with happy on deep level? Is being happy being too much? I am sure we wish for others to be happy. But are not able or allowing to be happy within ourselves?
Kelli Lynn, I found Joseph’s answer that defined happiness and I paraphrase..’.happiness is when we stop striving for happiness…’Maybe, many of us just don’t want to be disappointed and find chasing happiness not very productive.
Carol Ann, this is so good. It definitely reminds me of when I started to say yes. When I stopped resisting. When things started to open up for me. Catching myself automatically saying no or that’s not for me, and questioning my motives behind the resistance.
I appreciate, and have benefited from, the inspiration that you offer here. 🙏
I remember meditating on water and being grateful for the easy access of clean water. Then as I kept at it, I was reminded of swimming in a lake. Being surrounded by water. Floating. And then I remember swimming in a beautiful river. The temperature was perfect. It felt so good. And then I remembered playing in the sprinkler on a super hot day. This made me smile.
What started as simple gratitude practice, became a feeling of playfulness and happiness.
This was early, in my gratitude practice. This may have been when I really felt the immediate impact of this practice. Until then, I was just kinda taking the steps and not really noticing much difference. This experience has stuck with me and kept me on this path.
Charlie, this reminds me that I go swimming at LA fitness everyday. It makes me grateful to have a place for exercising to burn down calories helping me with my type 2 diabetes.
Once again- some inspiring reflections here for my learning benefit. Thank you for taking the time to put your knowledge and experience into words. A Grateful attitude is MAGIC. Absolutely magic. It amazes me everytime I choose it and I’ll be 100 💯 honest- its not always. But I do catch myself faster and faster. For me, It turns an unhappy marriage into a blissful one, a stressful career into a lucky choice, a worrisome adult child into a capable man finding his way among just a few. My gratitude is also contagious as I watch it effecting those around me. Yesterday, we got an expensive ticket – we were actually conned by the police officer. The entire row of cars were speeding but the officer chose our car . He gave us a choice- 1) he takes my husband’s license and we pay the 2600 peso fine in court on Monday to get the license back. We would have to abandon our vehicle or have towed. Or 2)we could give the officer 1500 peso and go on our way. My husband was terribly upset, feeling like life had the odds against him (over the last week, a few things went wrong) I don’t know if this is being Grateful but I just couldn’t stay bitter longer than a couple of seconds against this policeman. I kept thinking – What if he spends that money on his family at Christmas? How wonderful! I also thought – that it is wonderful that this will slow my husband down even if only for today and I won’t have to “nag”. Have a wonderful day today my Grateful gurus and I am going to stay in the slow lane – thats where all the beauty can be seen.
Heather, Your response to today’s question is very helpful to me. It says so much about forsaking judgment, accepting what is, placing our egoic mind in our heart. Thank you.
When I see a crisp blue sky on a wintery day I’m grateful and a happy grin covers my face. It’s a paradox as I know those blue skies mean the temps are minus X iand there’s probably a wind chill! LOL. After 30+ years in MN I’ve learned to just add more clothes. Have a cozy warm restful weekend all. 🌬️☮️
Gratefulness is making me happy right now. Life has its problems but I look upon my Christmas tree filled with ornaments of love, memories and faith and even through some sad nostalgia of lost ones my heart is so full of gratefulness and happiness I feel it smiling.
DeAnn, You’ve tapped a bunch of childhood memories of Christmas trees for me. Mama always had to buy the tree when they had been marked half price and were a bit droopy! But, we decorated it together as a family with such love.
As my team prepared yesterday to host a Holiday party our families with a child with special needs I wrote them a message. I was emotional all day, couldn’t really put a name to it but I believe it was joy from the gratefulness I was trying to express.
“Team,
It’s Christmas party day! I’ll be honest—I’m digging deep to find some extra energy today, but I know it will be worth it. After 22 years of Christmas Peds parties, I’m reminded that for someone out there, this is their first—and maybe their only—experience like this.
Today is our chance to pour a little fun and holiday spirit into these families. I hope each of you can take a moment at some point to let it all soak in and fill you up.
“Thank you” doesn’t feel like enough, but please know it comes from the deepest part of my heart. If all you can do is show up today, that is enough. And if you’ve spent hours working on a piece of this, know that it is deeply appreciated.
Let’s make it a day to remember—and let’s show these families the magic that happens when we come together with purpose and heart!“
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Many times. Sometimes I will be sitting on the sofa feeling sad. Then I will look to the right and see the staircase and then think about my home and the fact that I have a home. I’ll look around and see my furniture and think how well it has served me as well as family and friends who have gathered in my home. I will usually see a few of my four cats and immediately feel love and gratefulness for their sweetness as well as their persnicketiness. Yes, their persnicketiness, too. Lol
I have much to feel grateful for and that does make me happy.
Peace to all on this Saturday.
This reminds me of a post or word for the day I read here a while ago…joy is the emotion that doesn’t depend on happiness.
Yet I do find when I am grateful, there is a deep sense of joy – and sometimes that produces a feeling of happiness too.
Many many years ago I read somewhere that happiness is a choice. This bit of wisdom resonated with me on a very deep level & stayed with me. I chose happiness in the midst of much turmoil in my marriage, in my life, in the world.
I found having an “attitude of gratitude” contributed to my happiness.
Being in a state of gratitude makes me happy.
I have made a choice to be happy.
And along with my happiness comes my gratitude for All.
Being grateful & happy are my intentions.
Thank you Br. David for your wisdom, kindness, compassion, generosity. 🙏🏻
🕊️♥️
I love what you’ve written here. A long time ago I also had to redefine my definition of happiness. Was it the same for you?
I get so much more out of the dwarf “happy” instead of “grumpy.”. Is there a grateful dwarf? Maybe the 8th one?
😂 Love this, Yram! 🥰 Lol
😂 made me giggle – thank you!
Me too, Cathie. 😄
🙂
Lol…love this idea!!!
Something about this question makes me feel as if there’s an expectation that gratitude leads to happiness. Gratefulness is what it is, for its own sake. It doesn’t have to produce anything..
Sometimes my gratefulness is on the quiet side. This morning I’m grateful for fresh, hot coffee that my sweetheart made for me in our usual routine. I didn’t move to, “Oh, I’m happy!”; I sat with the appreciation.
If I’m outdoors and feeling grateful for the beauty around me I often feel an uplift of energy. That’s as much from being outside and paying attention as it is from gratefulness directly. Things that I note as moments of delight are delightful for me with or without a specific pause for gratitude.
The other day I saw an eagle soar overhead. I’m so grateful to live where bald eagles fly and yes, seeing one makes me happy. And today being Saturday makes me feel both grateful and happy for sure. I have the gift of time.
I feel in a similar way,
dear Barb,
and don’t count ‘happy’ as a goal anymore.
Maybe I’m getting old,
but I’m quite settled in being content. ♥
I think feeling content is more important, more lasting. Although given the choice, I choose both. 😊
When I read today’s question, I thought I don’t know that gratefulness has ever made me happy. I say that because for me, happy has never been an easy word to define. I lean more toward the word, joy. Gratefulness has helped me to find myself filled with joy from time to time but mostly gratefulness has helped me stop fighting and fleeing from what is. I read this meditation from Miribai Starr this morning on Richard Rohr’s site and I found myself smiling, feeling real, being grateful for the “Yes” gratefulness has brought into my life. 🙂
Saying Yes to Our Lives
Mirabai Starr recounts how she came to say yes to God in her life as it is instead of how she imagined it should be:
All my life, I have been enamored of the God-intoxicated ones. Those rarified souls who slip into ecstatic states and spontaneously utter poetry. The ones who exude deep stillness, embody equanimity, listen more than they speak. The initiated and the ordained, the monastics…. I wanted to be one of them. Until I didn’t.
I want you not to want that as well…. I want you to want to be exactly who you are: a true human person doing their best to show up for this fleeting life with a measure of grace, with kindness and a sense of humor, with curiosity and a willingness to not have all the answers, with reverence for life.
You do not need to chant all night in a temple in the Himalayas. You don’t have to be the newest incarnation of Mary Magdalene. It is not necessary to read or write spiritual books. You are not required to know the difference between Mahayana and Theravada Buddhism or memorize the Beatitudes. All you have to do to walk the path of the ordinary mystic is to cultivate a gaze of wonder and step onto the road. Keep walking. Rest up, and walk again. Fall down, get up, walk on. Pay attention to the landscape. To the ways it changes and the ways it stays the same. Be alert to surprises and turn with the turning of the seasons. Honor your body, train your mind, and keep your heart open against all odds. Say yes to what is, even when it is uncomfortable or embarrassing or heartbreaking. Hurl your handful of yes into the treetops and then lift your face as the rain of yes drops its grace all over you, all around you, and settles deep inside you.
Reference: Mirabai Starr, Ordinary Mysticism: Your Life as Sacred Ground (HarperOne, 2024), 214–215.
I am truly just pondering out load here… but I have noticed that several responses today are struggling with the “happy”… I know I almost discarded it for the day when I first read happy.
Are we not allowing ourselves to be happy? Why are we uncomfortable with happy on deep level? Is being happy being too much? I am sure we wish for others to be happy. But are not able or allowing to be happy within ourselves?
Kelli Lynn, I found Joseph’s answer that defined happiness and I paraphrase..’.happiness is when we stop striving for happiness…’Maybe, many of us just don’t want to be disappointed and find chasing happiness not very productive.
I think I was trying to say something along these lines,
dear Carol Ann,
when I responded to Barb’s post.
Thank you for posting this here. ♥
Wow! Thank you. I am going to read this a few times. Your words are packed with wisdom
I saw her in person a few years back. She definitely lives this. Thank you for posting it..
What a wonderful piece. Thank you for sharing it, Carol Ann.
Barb, You are most welcome…It is one of the most helpful and life-giving things I’ve read recently.
Carol Ann, this is so good. It definitely reminds me of when I started to say yes. When I stopped resisting. When things started to open up for me. Catching myself automatically saying no or that’s not for me, and questioning my motives behind the resistance.
I appreciate, and have benefited from, the inspiration that you offer here. 🙏
Charlie, it’s just like me with looking past my agendas to protect my basic desire for autonomy and learning to trust my root people more.
I remember meditating on water and being grateful for the easy access of clean water. Then as I kept at it, I was reminded of swimming in a lake. Being surrounded by water. Floating. And then I remember swimming in a beautiful river. The temperature was perfect. It felt so good. And then I remembered playing in the sprinkler on a super hot day. This made me smile.
What started as simple gratitude practice, became a feeling of playfulness and happiness.
This was early, in my gratitude practice. This may have been when I really felt the immediate impact of this practice. Until then, I was just kinda taking the steps and not really noticing much difference. This experience has stuck with me and kept me on this path.
I enjoyed your memories and how your dominoes fell to link the 2 feelings☺️thank you for a visible connection.
Charlie, this reminds me that I go swimming at LA fitness everyday. It makes me grateful to have a place for exercising to burn down calories helping me with my type 2 diabetes.
“…a feeling of playfulness and happiness.” Your post brings me joy, dear Charlie.
Once again- some inspiring reflections here for my learning benefit. Thank you for taking the time to put your knowledge and experience into words. A Grateful attitude is MAGIC. Absolutely magic. It amazes me everytime I choose it and I’ll be 100 💯 honest- its not always. But I do catch myself faster and faster. For me, It turns an unhappy marriage into a blissful one, a stressful career into a lucky choice, a worrisome adult child into a capable man finding his way among just a few. My gratitude is also contagious as I watch it effecting those around me. Yesterday, we got an expensive ticket – we were actually conned by the police officer. The entire row of cars were speeding but the officer chose our car . He gave us a choice- 1) he takes my husband’s license and we pay the 2600 peso fine in court on Monday to get the license back. We would have to abandon our vehicle or have towed. Or 2)we could give the officer 1500 peso and go on our way. My husband was terribly upset, feeling like life had the odds against him (over the last week, a few things went wrong) I don’t know if this is being Grateful but I just couldn’t stay bitter longer than a couple of seconds against this policeman. I kept thinking – What if he spends that money on his family at Christmas? How wonderful! I also thought – that it is wonderful that this will slow my husband down even if only for today and I won’t have to “nag”. Have a wonderful day today my Grateful gurus and I am going to stay in the slow lane – thats where all the beauty can be seen.
Heather, Your response to today’s question is very helpful to me. It says so much about forsaking judgment, accepting what is, placing our egoic mind in our heart. Thank you.
When I can stop-look-go, I forget about what was making me unhappy and shift gears to feeling happy.
Gratefulness always makes me happy and also thankful too.
Enjoy the weekend everyone.
Michele, Your powerful, caring, compassionate energy travels over the miles to my door daily. I give thanks for you.
When I see a crisp blue sky on a wintery day I’m grateful and a happy grin covers my face. It’s a paradox as I know those blue skies mean the temps are minus X iand there’s probably a wind chill! LOL. After 30+ years in MN I’ve learned to just add more clothes. Have a cozy warm restful weekend all. 🌬️☮️
Very cold here in WI also. You are so right about layering clothing. I even find a scarf and a hat keep me warm in the house.
Carla, it’s a real winter here in Minnesota this year. A white Christmas is set and stone.
Carla, It’s suppose to get to 40 degrees today in Kansas and I’m so excited! Can you tell that I lived in the deep south most of my adult life???
Gratefulness is making me happy right now. Life has its problems but I look upon my Christmas tree filled with ornaments of love, memories and faith and even through some sad nostalgia of lost ones my heart is so full of gratefulness and happiness I feel it smiling.
DeAnn, You’ve tapped a bunch of childhood memories of Christmas trees for me. Mama always had to buy the tree when they had been marked half price and were a bit droopy! But, we decorated it together as a family with such love.
As my team prepared yesterday to host a Holiday party our families with a child with special needs I wrote them a message. I was emotional all day, couldn’t really put a name to it but I believe it was joy from the gratefulness I was trying to express.
“Team,
It’s Christmas party day! I’ll be honest—I’m digging deep to find some extra energy today, but I know it will be worth it. After 22 years of Christmas Peds parties, I’m reminded that for someone out there, this is their first—and maybe their only—experience like this.
Today is our chance to pour a little fun and holiday spirit into these families. I hope each of you can take a moment at some point to let it all soak in and fill you up.
“Thank you” doesn’t feel like enough, but please know it comes from the deepest part of my heart. If all you can do is show up today, that is enough. And if you’ve spent hours working on a piece of this, know that it is deeply appreciated.
Let’s make it a day to remember—and let’s show these families the magic that happens when we come together with purpose and heart!“
What an inspiring sentiment you wrote,
dear Kelli Lynn . . .
may your Christmas party be blessed
with love . . . ♥
Kelli, Thank you…
So lovely to inspire and share this event with your team. The world would be a better place if more leaders like you were at the reigns.
Today! My cups is running over! Thank you universe! 💯🌱🙌💯
A natural byproduct of gratefulness is happiness, and my overall happiness has increased with the practice 🙂
Sunnypatti, I’ve noticed that too with a purer heart as my agendas are steadily decreasing.