Reflections

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  1. c
    carol

    As I gave thought to the previous reflections the themes of acceptance as the path to forgiveness, the unleashing of love that forgiveness provides, forgiveness of our unconsciousness that precipitated past now undesirable behaviours and how ” it is what it is’ brings peace resonated within me.
    After watching the video of the polar bear shake out the trauma in its body due to being chased by a helicopter and being tranquilized as part of monitoring health of the population ( the video is called Polar Bear Shaking Trauma) I decided that i too, as a mammal must have that capacity. So, as I read what resonated I shook out what was embodied in the resonance.
    And so gratitude for the kindness and sincerity and good will of the contributions herein, arises within.

    11 months ago
  2. Robin Ann

    I think of the serenity prayer “Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” Forgiveness usually comes easier to me with my Faith but sometimes takes a little time.

    11 months ago
  3. M
    Mohana Puvvada

    In my opinion, forgiving and accepting people/ situations are the great paths to make life grateful. When we question ourselves, the answer always lies behind. Suppose, if in a given situation, can we change someone for the way they are? sometimes the answer is NO. Do you have control over their behavior? the answer is always NO. When you do not have control over others behavior, we just have to accept the way they are and the way we are, brings us great peace. When you forgive someone, you will be at peace by letting things and situation go. By forgiving ourselves we make a greater peace and then our point of view towards life is a bliss.

    11 months ago
  4. luv-1-nutter

    Learn To trust myself which is difficult at first. But, I have to trust others who accept the journey. keep moving forward. Take one step to God and he takes 10 steps to towards you. Do I think or do thoughts think me ? Whatis this reality what is illusion how to clear
    away the illusion which has both my arms and legs bound together?

    11 months ago
  5. Charlie T

    By attempting to see things clearly and
    as they are, and not as a projection of my
    Inner world, I can begin to invite
    compassion and kindness into the
    situation. It’s seems to be the most
    difficult, when someone is unaware
    of their effect, and are hardened against
    any change. This requires a reminder that
    we are all on our own journey and we
    all have our own stories and experiences.

    11 months ago
  6. Yram

    Be aware of the possibility that the situation brings growth.

    11 months ago
  7. MzJerri

    One must first forgive themself. I know because I have a hard time forgiving myself and all that causes is pain to me not anyone else. how can someone forgive you if you can’t forgive yourself? it poses the same question how can someone love you if you have a hard time loving yourself. the two got stand in hand. that’s the fight I have with me. will I ever find true happiness and will I ever know the reason people love me? lots of questions but not many answers.

    11 months ago
    1. A
      Ana Maria

      What a beautiful comment! May you find in your lifetime many reasons to love yourself. Sometimes is hard to receive the love of others thinking we are not worthy of their gift. It is easier to give than to receive. But you deserve to be love! You are love! Blessings to you.

      11 months ago
  8. Carol

    There is a folk saying, “what we resist persists” or as Eckhart Tolle says, “Don’t turn a situation into a problem.” These are daily mantras for me and they helps me deal lovingly with whatever or whoever enters my day to day existence. Accepting “what is” frees me in so many ways.

    Forgiveness can be complicated. I share some forgiveness meditations, prayers, and poems that I have written over the years.

    “Forgiveness means letting go of the hope for a better past.” LAMA SURYA DAS

    That’s Life by Carol Ann Conner
    Life is for giving not for getting.
    Memories are for lessons worth learning.
    Wishes are possibilities worth having.
    Expectations are Judgments in disguise.
    With hands and heart open, I greet this day.

    “Mistakes are the portal to discovery” James Joyce

    From RE to BE by Carol Ann Conner
    Re-member-ing
    Re-al-izing
    Re-lat-ing
    Re-ceiv-ing
    Re-triev-ing
    Re-joic-ing
    In this moment
    This awesome gift
    of Be-ing

    Be-ing open
    Be-ing willing
    To see more
    Than the little Me

    Evolution stirring
    Breathing greater
    Awareness
    Re-creating
    Opportunities
    Challenges
    Blessings
    From my miss-takes

    Cellular passions
    growing from within
    motivating and inviting
    me to rise from their ashes
    Re-newed.

    Forgiveness Meditations by Carol Ann Conner

    Many years ago my mentor stated, “Only God can forgive.” That has swirled around in this analytical brain of mine every since and after many years of not being terribly successful at this thing called forgiveness, I have had some personal realizations:

    In my own experience, all we can do is make a decision to forgive. By that I mean that we choose to be willing to forgive. We “cast the bread upon the water.” We decide to forgive. It may take a day, a week, a year or it might happen instantly. Our job is willingness and that willingness unleashes a love that is transformative.

    Forgiving involves letting go of the past and beginning again. Sometimes, it is necessary to grieve; sometimes that is scary because it requires us to feel emotions we have stuffed but we must allow ourselves to feel so we can heal.

    When I have the courage to ask myself, who is the forgiving for? I realize the answer is me. It is for me so that I can be free. Freedom is the payload.

    Some of us carry a life-limiting belief that we must be able to forgive totally to experience the transformative love forgiveness offers. I have not found that to be true. In my experience, even when I succeed in letting go of the anger and resentment I hold toward the other, I often hold myself hostage because I fail to forgive myself. Willingness, willingness, willingness is my mantra in all things.

    11 months ago
    1. Mary

      There is so much wisdom in what you have written Carol.
      The quote by Eckhart Tolle, “Don’t turn a situation into a problem, was helpful for me to read today. Many things just are what they are. I don’t have to spend so much of my energy being concerned. Anyway, thank you for taking the time to write.
      Also, what we resist, persists. So true! Thanks again. ♥️♥️♥️

      11 months ago
  9. Nannette

    I have to start by keeping one foot in front of the other….and keeping promises to myself. By letting go of old patterns of behavior and grasping onto a bright new path. Today is my Birthday…I enter my 71st year…I cannot believe that.. How Blessed I have been in many, many ways. Some trauma’s along the way- but that is the gift of my journey in life. We never stop learning …and we never stop making mistakes- no matter how old we are. But forgiving others and forgiving ourselves is the only way forward. I am back home again after four months of travel…and how Blessed I feel to be back in the “woods”…We are all at peace, my husband, my dog and two cats….as they say “Life is Good”….and life is better because of this site and all of your here. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

    11 months ago
    1. Michele

      Happy birthday Nannette! 🎂

      11 months ago
    2. Robin Ann

      Love what you wrote and Happy BIrthday!!

      11 months ago
    3. Joseph McCann

      Have a nice rest of the day commemorating your birth Nannette!

      11 months ago
    4. sunnypatti

      Many blessings for your 71st trip around the sun!

      11 months ago
    5. Dolores Kazanjian

      Happy Birthday, Nannette and thank you for sharing. You are just a child. Dolores (88)

      11 months ago
    6. pkr

      Dear Nannette, Happy Happy Birthday to You….wishing you a blessed beautiful peace-filled day….🎂🙏🏻✨
      Celebrate You, Cheers…🥂

      11 months ago
    7. Yram

      Happy birth-day!
      Thankfulness for the past
      Courage for the present
      Hope for the future!
      My wish for you!

      11 months ago
      1. Nannette

        Yram, Thank you…How very beautiful. I am going to write this down and always remember this…a lovely gift!!

        11 months ago
    8. Carol

      Happy Birthday, dear Nannettte. Blessings to you and yours always and all ways.

      11 months ago
      1. Nannette

        Thank you so very much, Carol!!

        11 months ago
  10. Joseph McCann

    I must accept that my past alcoholic behaviors have caused my wife mental anguish and trauma. Even though I have been abstinent for 13 1/2 months this go around, every once in a while something I say, a mannerism or date in time sets her off. The last one was about a week ago. I must remember my breathing skills on the fly as the bad adrenalin as I call it, fight, flight or fear, can make me defensive. I told her last week I have accepted my past behaviors, not forgotten them, just I have accepted the fact that I deeply scared her psyche. We have had some couples therapy and Cheryl knows that in order for me to grow I must leave my baggage behind as all I have is the present, the now. I am grateful for all the help and guidance I have sought out including the daily reflection on this site and the support of everyone who participates on these pages. Thank you all.

    11 months ago
    1. Carol

      Joseph, Today’s quote from Jane Goodall says so much to me about the here and now. “You cannot get through a single day without having an impact on the world around you.”

      What you do makes a difference, and you have to decide what kind of difference you want to make.” We can’t change the past all(both you and Cheryl have is the present. May you both be able to put your burdens down but take the lessons they offer with you. May you both take every opportunity in the “now” presents to make amends to each other.

      I can look through the rear view mirror and see so many ways I chose to react not respond to my husband’s alcoholism. Trust me, she suffers from that same fight, flight and fear syndrome that you do. Alcoholism impacts and requires healing for the whole family.

      I love that song by the Judds: “Love can build a Bridge.” In 1996, My husband and I divorced after 35 years of marriage. He passed away in 2010 but I still find myself building that bridge. I’m still gaining self awareness from that baggage I laid down long ago.

      Sincerely, Carol

      11 months ago
    2. Nannette

      Joseph, You are a good man and your wife understands your trials…together you are growing stronger. Be kind to yourself…you have come such a long way…a journey that continues. Every day- you give me and others encouragement and wisdom. Many Blessings to you and your wife.

      11 months ago
  11. EJP

    By letting go……

    11 months ago
  12. Avril

    Acceptance is the prerequisite for real forgiveness. This question hit me in the heart because I’m resistant to my stepdaughter at an atomic level. Our disharmony pervades the home. It’s “the thing”. But, I’m not giving up. I need to accept her mental illness will always be. I can love her through this or be constantly blown away with shock and pissed off. I don’t want that. I’m choosing nonresistance. It requires lots of 4,7,8 breathing and prayer.

    11 months ago
    1. c
      carol

      Thank you, your reflection has added some light to my path.

      11 months ago
  13. Michele

    Start with a deep breath and then a smile. TGIF:)

    11 months ago
  14. sunnypatti

    By remembering I’m not in control. By pausing, breathing and knowing that everything changes. And also knowing that there is a lesson somewhere in the situation!

    11 months ago
  15. Kevin

    Give it time, and bring it to prayer.

    11 months ago
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