Reflections

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  1. D
    Deann

    The “what ifs,” if onlys” and the impatient “when?”

    2 weeks ago
  2. Robin Ann

    I try to retrain my brain to think of the positives or focus on the positives. It isn’t always easy though but I try!

    2 weeks ago
    1. D
      Deann

      Yes!

      2 weeks ago
  3. O.Christina

    To be in the present moment needs awareness, where i have to find back to for example when allowing too intense emotions to distract me from the moment being,. To take a little distance from them in order to look at them as what they are and not to allow them to carry me away and letting go of this kind of unhelpful clinging to a kind of adopted habit will help to come back to the present moment. Thank you for this question, friends. May you all have a good night´s sleep and a fresh new day full of light may be yours then.

    2 weeks ago
  4. Dolores Kazanjian

    Are there any habits or beliefs that keep me from beiing present? No, not really.

    2 weeks ago
    1. L
      Loc Tran

      Dolores, responding to your answer and your comment on my post, I totally see where you’re going. From 2nd hand and some 1st hand experience, we become more at peace and have an easier time being present and expressing ourselves authentically as we age. There’s nothing to lose. Our careers are behind us.
      At this point in my life, I’m semi-retired. Having a few part-time piano jobs helps a lot. Music relaxes the mind. I come in, play the piano for people, and come home. There’s nothing to lose. Most other fields, especially the more social ones, have many variables, put simply.

      2 weeks ago
      1. Dolores Kazanjian

        You nailed it, Loc Tran. BTW, I have a number of friends who are professional musicians and I know it’s not an easy life.

        2 weeks ago
  5. Antoinette

    Of course it’s worrying about what if’s! Thoughts of the future. Thoughts are what make us stray from the present moment . Thankful due to the meditation method of discarding we have a way to deal with these thoughts .

    2 weeks ago
  6. Emmaleah

    I have a habit of ruminating on certain thoughts, worries, or memories. It often traps me in my mind and prohibits me from being present. I have good days and bad days when it comes to stepping away from these thoughts; today I will try my best to stay present rather than worry about what is to come or what has recently occurred.
    Mahalo for the question 🙏💓

    2 weeks ago
  7. Nannette

    My mind gets busy and it seems difficult to turn off negative thoughts. It is funny how a bad interaction with a market person can impact you (me!). But I am trying to look at all the good in my world…and stay present and focused.

    2 weeks ago
    1. L
      Loc Tran

      Nannette, responding to your answer and comment from mine, I’m learning with you. There’s been improvement on my end over the last year, but old tendencies still remain at times. Another key bullet point I learned from “Zen Mind; Beginner’s Mind” is that a calm and constant mind keeps us stable under chaos. In terms of dealing with people more effectively, the best answer I can find comes in this quote. “The best teacher in life is experience” LeBron James. There’s no cure all for anything, but we’ll take 50%. Any bit of progress is always better than 0.

      2 weeks ago
  8. Charlie T

    There are many habits and a few beliefs
    that take me out of the present moment.
    I consider them all distractions. And some
    of these I have removed from my life.
    Awareness, is the key though. Simply being
    aware that I have drifted off, and like a
    meditation, coming back to the present
    moment with gentleness and non judgement.

    2 weeks ago
    1. Josie

      My process, too, Charlie. “With gentleness & non- judgment” is a good reminder. Thanks.

      2 weeks ago
    2. L
      Loc Tran

      Charlie, I tried the traditional version of silent meditation. I only lasted for 6 minutes. It’s that busy impure mind again looking for gaining idea or improvement. I switched back to the guided version, and it felt much more relaxing. I love how the Soothing Pod App makes us feel comfortable when bringing us back to the present through breath awareness. The lady has a sweet-sounding voice. Those people are well-trained professionals.

      2 weeks ago
  9. Kevin

    There have been times when I have needed to remind myself to be present to what is happening or going on at a particular moment, though I don’t believe that it has ever risen to a problem level.

    Conversely, though, I will say that there are things, many things perhaps, that I do not feel the need to be present to at all for various reasons… or, no reason at all!

    To be sure, there are many things that I am laser focused on, to which I pay close attention, because they are important and hold meaning for me. This, I feel, is human nature and thus contributes to the very make up of our personality and what we are known for among friends and family members.

    2 weeks ago
  10. Avril

    I still subscribe to the idea time is a limited resource. I am working on slowing down–when I rush I lose presence and joy.

    2 weeks ago
    1. Josie

      Slowing down is my challenge, too. Again, awareness is key for me in this transformation process.

      2 weeks ago
  11. pkr

    I guess there are a few habits that keep me from being in the present moment like worrying & future tripping. However, the one that I am currently struggling with, is my addiction to the internet. I spend way too much time on my devices. I am trying to be more conscious of putting my phone down. Giving myself time limits, timeouts. It’s hard. I am a work in progress.

    2 weeks ago
  12. Barb C

    Reading online is a habit that can easily tip over into following links without a lot of thought or intention. This space isn’t like that; any links you all share are always valuable. It’s the “filler” reading that can be a bit of a rabbit hole and eat time without me having an actual intention to use my time that way. I’m going to try to shift so that if I open the computer on a weekend it’s with a specific purpose–“I am doing my morning poetry reading and gratefulness time” rather than “I’m sitting here with my computer and after that, let’s see where it takes me.” If I decide it’s a lazy morning with random reading that would be fine–and it would be intentional rather than accidental.

    2 weeks ago
    1. L
      Loc Tran

      Barb, I’m too familiar with filler reading. Here are 3 questions that jump out.
      1. How many responses does this daily living question have?
      2. How many loves do I have?
      3. Who, how many, and what kind of comments do I have?
      This brings me up to Suzuki. Humility is the main lesson I take from reading “Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind” It’s helped me gain the right understanding of zen in its purest form and the lifestyle of a zen munk. I never plan on being one and am happy with where I am in life. A couple things I know for sure about purity are that everything in its purest form is always different from our perceptions of purity. I’m also not as pure as I often think I am which can certainly be said for many other people as well.

      2 weeks ago
    2. Elaine

      Barb, will you share what poetry you receive online? I really enjoy Rosemary Wahtola Trommer’s daily offering, also a lovely weekly blog called Heart Poems. Any gems you’ve discovered?

      2 weeks ago
      1. Barb C

        Rosemerry is one of my favorites! She’s in my morning routine. I’m in my third year of reading through the poems posted on each day’s date at https://www.ayearofbeinghere.com/, curated by Phyllis Cole-Dai. They’re all worth revisiting. I also go to poetryfoundation.org and poets.org; they post a poem every day. I find various sites to read my way through where others have collected poems; right now that includes https://www.americanlifeinpoetry.org/, https://poetrying.wordpress.com/, and https://readalittlepoetry.com/. I don’t necessarily get to all of these every morning; those last three tend to be saved for weekends. When I read something by a poet I really like I also do a quick search to find out if they have a site where they’re sharing more of their work, so right now I have tabs open for Mark Nepo, David Whyte, and William Ayot.

        And then there are the physical books….

        Came back to add one more: Maya Stein’s 10-Line Tuesdays. She has an archive https://mayastein.com/poetry and you can sign up to receive the new one each week via email. It takes her a while to update the archive.

        2 weeks ago
    3. Avril

      The rabbit hole!

      2 weeks ago
  13. Ngoc Nguyen

    One habit that prevents me from being present is my smartphone addiction. I didn’t realize that flowers had already bloomed in my garden. I wasn’t aware that my father-in-law just got back from chemotherapy. I didn’t know there might be some rain tomorrow. To overcome this distraction, the best way to return to the present is to reduce my smartphone usage as much as possible and spend more time engaging in outdoor activities, especially during the summer. It’s a bit challenging for me, but I must make a change.

    2 weeks ago
    1. L
      Loc Tran

      My Ngoc, I enjoy walking with you so much. Love you.

      2 weeks ago
  14. Yram

    I tend to shut a person off because I think it will be the same old response.

    Dear friends,
    Due to some major medical issues I am experiencing, I will limit my daily responses. I fully intend to read the quote, question, and responses. Your collect wisdom is amazing and my day is not complete without it.
    Thank you!

    2 weeks ago
    1. sunnypatti

      Sending comfort & healing.

      2 weeks ago
    2. Michele

      Loving kindness and healing to you Yram.

      2 weeks ago
    3. D
      Deann

      Will be thinking and praying for you

      2 weeks ago
    4. Joseph McCann

      Loving Kindness your way dear Yram.

      2 weeks ago
    5. Anna

      Dear Yram, I wish you the best for a quick recovery. I hope you can soon take part in this sacred community, bringing us your deep wiseness. Be careful and gentle with yourself.

      2 weeks ago
    6. Betsy Rodman / Grateful Living

      Dear Yram,
      Best wishes to you for healing, wellness, and joy from all of us at Team Grateful. We are grateful for your presence!

      2 weeks ago
    7. O.Christina

      Dear Yram, wishing you all the best for healing and being well soon! May all good winds of fortune and cure be with you. May you be blessed, dear friend.✨

      2 weeks ago
    8. Nannette

      Dear Yram, I am so very sorry to hear this. You will be missed as you always have very valuable responses. You are in my prayers that soon you will be on the mend. Best wishes, my friend.

      2 weeks ago
    9. Charlie T

      🙏❤️

      2 weeks ago
    10. Avril

      Dear Yram,
      I am sending you love and light. I am holding you in my heart.

      2 weeks ago
    11. L
      Loc Tran

      Yram, wishing you well. In terms of your habit, I’ve certainly been there done that before. I’m continuing to work on reducing irritability to a more manageable level. Even within a few months, I can certainly say that I’ve made improvements on that, especially based on my emotional response making the switchover to the traditional Asian base.

      2 weeks ago
    12. Barb C

      Wishing you a successful recovery, Yram. Thank you for letting us know you’re here in spirit.

      2 weeks ago
  15. L
    Loc Tran

    A strong desire to do things my way jumps out. In terms of fixing this, there’s a backstory. It’s all water under the bridge now. We can all laugh about this when looking back. It was my LGBT response on the inspiration question from a couple months ago. If the time comes closer and I go to page 61 and look at the same question, I wouldn’t delete my controversial response despite opposition in the heat of the moment. It’s best to use it as a learning moment. Deletion is a form of cutting the thorns off the roses. Like Nannette said on my apology post a couple days later, we all are learning no matter how old we may be that some things are better left unsaid.
    A couple nights, especially the 2nd one, leading up to my sincere apology post, particularly for Michele, I was faced with two doors spiritually. Door 1 was to continue with the modern base I’ve been comfortable with throughout my life but have to be a part of societal norms. Door 2 is the traditional door bringing me closer to my family and culture requiring me to sacrifice short term comfort. I was in tears and came to my senses of choosing the 2nd door.
    Fast forward a month later, I can say for certain that I chose the right door for myself. Embracing my roots more has continued to give me the best of all worlds. My conservative base has strengthened while gaining acceptance for others for who they are. Life becomes simpler, and I feel more protected under a family system. Desires to do things my way has been reduced which is the best one can ask for.
    Doing things the “My way” is “High risk; high reward.” When it works, it’s pleasurable. When it doesn’t, the pain is greater. Another thing I learned that recently jumped out is the less we try to do things our way, the less likelier we are to say things that are better off left unsaid. Therefore, I plan on using my mistake to help raise awareness for future members, especially my generation and younger.
    I agree with the narrative that we have stronger desires to change the world when we’re younger and often find ourselves taking on more than what we can handle. I’m certainly one of them. Recently, especially over the last year, I’ve been trending towards working on myself more. That’s most of us as we age. We just happen to get to that point at different points in our lives.

    2 weeks ago
    1. Dolores Kazanjian

      What a beautiful post, Loc Tran. It is really from the heart. You are a beautiful soul. And, as I said before, IMO no apology was necessaty.

      2 weeks ago
    2. Nannette

      What a great post Loc Tran…WOW…you sure have learned a great deal in a short time. The important aspect is ..you are happy within your family, they give you protection and comfort…and what a wonderful feeling that is. You are on the path best meant for you. Be good to yourself!! I am so glad you joined this Community. I look forward to your thoughts daily.

      2 weeks ago
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