Good morning from southern Spain! Since my (much older) husband has become terminally ill, we have a new appreciation for the simplest things. Being home in our own space after weeks in hospital, playing with our two dogs and caring for them; planning and cooking good food, shopping in our local small town; coffee with friends…our ‘normal, boring’ routine is now something to aspire to and give thanks for. I no longer take wellness, or even mobility, for granted. It’s all a gift!
Being terminally ill,
dear Lydia,
certainly is a wake up call
to re-evaluate your priorities.
I am sorry
that you and your husband are going through this,
but it sounds
as if you are finding gratitude
for what you both share
and for what you DO have . . .
it’s all a gift.
Blessings to you both . . .
I will hold you in my heart
with love . . . ♥
sparrow
Hardships and loses have shaped my life’s experiences in so many ways and I am grateful for the various lessons learned and still learning. Hardships and losses break down my rigidity and allow me to be curious, attentive, present, courageous, and not fear, persevere, and not give up easily, accept impermanence, continue to love, and not hate, …. “Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift.” Mary Oliver
During times of hardship and loss; I merely struggled to survive. As a child; I just wondered how could this happen to me.. Being grateful during that time was not something I could identify. Although in my heart…when I was given a safe home..I knew joy and love. Perhaps in that way of thought I was indeed grateful. Now as a very old adult, I look back and can see how those times did indeed make me who I turned out to be and how grateful I am. If I did not go through some of the pain, loss, sorrow and hardship…I would not have walked the journey that brought me to a very good life. I now am so very grateful for so much in my life…and for new chances – for each new day brings more reason to be grateful…a bonus!!
There are different kinds of poverty . . .
that of the body,
and that of the spirit.
Anne Frank and Etty Hillesum
both lived lives of abject poverty and want
after they were incarcerated in concentration camps
during World War II.
Anne first,
and later Etty,
spoke to me about living with gratitude and hope
in the midst of deprivation.
Throughout the dark years of my own life
I wore a badge of guilt on my heart,
hating myself
because they had suffered so much more
and were still able to find grace and compassion.
After all,
their suffering was so much greater than mine . . .
I did not deserve to sink into my own grief,
sorrow,
and poverty of spirit,
while they were such shining examples of endurance,
both physically and spiritually.
But somehow,
that flower of hope,
that tiny bud of gratefulness
seeded itself in the hard, packed earth of my pain,
and opened me up
to what eventually became my journey to healing.
and started to grow.
The hardship,
after it was suggested to me
to write five thankful things every day,
became the reason to notice what I had
more than what I had not,
and the sullen, obligatory words I wrote in my journal . . .
‘I am grateful for this,
I am grateful for that’,
eventually worked their way into my consciousness.
Yes,
my physical life might be meager
and full of despair,
but the sun still shone on me and warmed my face,
people still smiled at me and warmed my heart.
I could buy and orange from time to time,
fill up a styrofoam plate with a week’s supply of food
at a Wendy’s salad bar,
and those were things to be truly grateful for.
Now,
most days
I don’t have to dig so deep . . .
my life is good,
but I know that pain and suffering will return again.
This time
I am armed with years of a deeper gratitude
than I have ever known,
and it will guide me through
the dark places
with Love. ♥
Thank you dear Sparrow, for reminding me that pain and suffering are like rust . . . they never sleep. I also, am better prepared to travel with the inevitable.
Thank yoou dearly for sharing your heart, dear Sparrow, and letting us know. So much love and so much pain. It is the jewel of your loving heart that is sparkling through each of your words and all of your pain. May His Love embrace you always. May all blessings be.
Dear Sparrow, What a heartfelt experience and post. Thank you so very much for this sharing of your life. What a learning reflection for me. Thank you from my heart. I am grateful for you and your words. Blessings my friend.
I am grateful for the dark times…not for what took me into them, but for the time there, even for the pain – physical, emotional and spiritual. I am thankful for the confusion, the disorientation, and the depth that led to the seeking, the reorientation and the places, people and insights for which I will always be grateful. I am not the person I was before entering that or any dark time, and that is a good thing. I learned not only gratitude, but compassion, empathy, patience, and hope. And most of that I saw in and learned from people who were helping or living with me during that season.
I have a retrospective understanding of the connections now that I wouldn’t have had in my younger years. Hardship and losses shaped who I am, certainly, and who I am in my inner core shaped how I responded in the moment. I’m fortunate to have had a happy, stable childhood with loving parents, which likely made me the “pragmatic optimist” I am.
My general attitude is that things have a way of working out over the long run, even if where they land in the moment isn’t where I’d hoped for, and all I can do is keep going forward from the new reality. Doesn’t do any good to keep digging the ruts deeper by dwelling on what did or didn’t happen–definitely something I did as a younger woman that I can recognize and mostly shut down now.
Current Me is more aware of gratefulness and more able to find it in difficult moments. Thanks to all of you and the people who operate the site who have helped me develop this practice.
For me it is important to see “how far I have come” in dealing with hardship and loss. The experience is more of a lesson than a burden. Recently, gratefulness, acceptance, surrender, and confidence are more prevalent than dread and fear.
The fact that you see the experience of hardship
as ‘more of a lesson than a burden’,.
dear Yram,
is a perception that is dear to my heart . . .
thank you. ♥
I don’t know that periods of hardship and loss shaped my experience of gratefulness but they led me to this site and the daily quote, the daily question, the articles, the poetry, the programs and videos have definitely shaped my experience and understanding of gratefulness.
Well, hardship and loss brought me here.
I have been shaped by all the events in my life, but the difficult experiences have provided the most opportunities for change. And at this point, my third phase of life, I can even find gratitude for my own suffering and this has expanded my ability to be compassionate.
And like most things, it’s a practice. I practice compassion.
“…the difficult experiences have provided the most opportunity for change.” It’s true! Gotta remember those difficult experiences are rich in opportunity. Thanks Charlie.
For the existence of periods of hardship and loss, my gratefulness grows for the blessings of the ability to overcome the hardship and for the values of what and whom I have lost in my life. It is just like how I am grateful for sunny days during excessive rainy days, and vice versa. Happy Monday, everyone! 🌸
In most situations of hardship and loss throughout my life, there have been other people who propped me up, supported me in moving through and beyond difficult times. My deep appreciation for how we can make a difference in others’ lives by showing up was elevated through those experiences. ♥️
Mary Mantei, people come into our lives at different stages for various reasons. Not all are meant to stay. We can certainly appreciate the purpose they served while moving forward.
As the ocean, life has its crest’s and troughs. Impermanence of all life and all manner of things in this dimension. At 68 I have experienced great joy, great loss and gratefulness. These past four years experiencing and practicing gratefulness has made the light and dark of my so called life much more understandable. May we all have enough. Peace, Love & Light.
It seems to me,
from what you wrote,
dear Joseph,
is that your Practice
has taught you well
how to navigate the valleys
as well as the peaks.
Life is good. ♥
From the last time we had this type of question to this time, not only my life hasn’t changed much but has remained stable for a few years now. The hard times taught me to be humble. Pride comes before fall. Combining both helps me balance humility with comfort. I can certainly remain grounded while enjoying the easy times for as long as it lasts.
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Good morning from southern Spain! Since my (much older) husband has become terminally ill, we have a new appreciation for the simplest things. Being home in our own space after weeks in hospital, playing with our two dogs and caring for them; planning and cooking good food, shopping in our local small town; coffee with friends…our ‘normal, boring’ routine is now something to aspire to and give thanks for. I no longer take wellness, or even mobility, for granted. It’s all a gift!
Being terminally ill,
dear Lydia,
certainly is a wake up call
to re-evaluate your priorities.
I am sorry
that you and your husband are going through this,
but it sounds
as if you are finding gratitude
for what you both share
and for what you DO have . . .
it’s all a gift.
Blessings to you both . . .
I will hold you in my heart
with love . . . ♥
sparrow
Hardships and loses have shaped my life’s experiences in so many ways and I am grateful for the various lessons learned and still learning. Hardships and losses break down my rigidity and allow me to be curious, attentive, present, courageous, and not fear, persevere, and not give up easily, accept impermanence, continue to love, and not hate, …. “Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift.” Mary Oliver
Indeed,
we do have must to learn from our hardships
if we choose.
You have chosen well.
Thank you,
dear Kansha,
for including Mary Oliver’s quote . . .
it fits in so beautifully
with most of our observations. ♥
During times of hardship and loss; I merely struggled to survive. As a child; I just wondered how could this happen to me.. Being grateful during that time was not something I could identify. Although in my heart…when I was given a safe home..I knew joy and love. Perhaps in that way of thought I was indeed grateful. Now as a very old adult, I look back and can see how those times did indeed make me who I turned out to be and how grateful I am. If I did not go through some of the pain, loss, sorrow and hardship…I would not have walked the journey that brought me to a very good life. I now am so very grateful for so much in my life…and for new chances – for each new day brings more reason to be grateful…a bonus!!
Your reflection placed gladness in my heart, Nannette.
I’m so very grateful,
dear Nanette,
for the life you have earned
and for new chances
every day. ♥
There are different kinds of poverty . . .
that of the body,
and that of the spirit.
Anne Frank and Etty Hillesum
both lived lives of abject poverty and want
after they were incarcerated in concentration camps
during World War II.
Anne first,
and later Etty,
spoke to me about living with gratitude and hope
in the midst of deprivation.
Throughout the dark years of my own life
I wore a badge of guilt on my heart,
hating myself
because they had suffered so much more
and were still able to find grace and compassion.
After all,
their suffering was so much greater than mine . . .
I did not deserve to sink into my own grief,
sorrow,
and poverty of spirit,
while they were such shining examples of endurance,
both physically and spiritually.
But somehow,
that flower of hope,
that tiny bud of gratefulness
seeded itself in the hard, packed earth of my pain,
and opened me up
to what eventually became my journey to healing.
and started to grow.
The hardship,
after it was suggested to me
to write five thankful things every day,
became the reason to notice what I had
more than what I had not,
and the sullen, obligatory words I wrote in my journal . . .
‘I am grateful for this,
I am grateful for that’,
eventually worked their way into my consciousness.
Yes,
my physical life might be meager
and full of despair,
but the sun still shone on me and warmed my face,
people still smiled at me and warmed my heart.
I could buy and orange from time to time,
fill up a styrofoam plate with a week’s supply of food
at a Wendy’s salad bar,
and those were things to be truly grateful for.
Now,
most days
I don’t have to dig so deep . . .
my life is good,
but I know that pain and suffering will return again.
This time
I am armed with years of a deeper gratitude
than I have ever known,
and it will guide me through
the dark places
with Love. ♥
❤️
We are all connected,
dear SunnyPatti . . .
you and I
as well. ♥
Thank you dear Sparrow, for reminding me that pain and suffering are like rust . . . they never sleep. I also, am better prepared to travel with the inevitable.
You are right,
dear Joseph . . .
‘rust never sleeps’
Neither does pain . . .
our scars
teach us to be more resilient
in the future . . .
namaste. ♥
Thank yoou dearly for sharing your heart, dear Sparrow, and letting us know. So much love and so much pain. It is the jewel of your loving heart that is sparkling through each of your words and all of your pain. May His Love embrace you always. May all blessings be.
I am honored,
dear Ose,
that my words speak to you,
because I feel the same way about you
with love . . . ♥
Dear Sparrow, What a heartfelt experience and post. Thank you so very much for this sharing of your life. What a learning reflection for me. Thank you from my heart. I am grateful for you and your words. Blessings my friend.
Thank you so much,
dear Nanette,
for your kindest words,
and for the feeling behind them.
I hold them like a treasure
to my heart
with love . . . ♥
I am grateful for the dark times…not for what took me into them, but for the time there, even for the pain – physical, emotional and spiritual. I am thankful for the confusion, the disorientation, and the depth that led to the seeking, the reorientation and the places, people and insights for which I will always be grateful. I am not the person I was before entering that or any dark time, and that is a good thing. I learned not only gratitude, but compassion, empathy, patience, and hope. And most of that I saw in and learned from people who were helping or living with me during that season.
I have a retrospective understanding of the connections now that I wouldn’t have had in my younger years. Hardship and losses shaped who I am, certainly, and who I am in my inner core shaped how I responded in the moment. I’m fortunate to have had a happy, stable childhood with loving parents, which likely made me the “pragmatic optimist” I am.
My general attitude is that things have a way of working out over the long run, even if where they land in the moment isn’t where I’d hoped for, and all I can do is keep going forward from the new reality. Doesn’t do any good to keep digging the ruts deeper by dwelling on what did or didn’t happen–definitely something I did as a younger woman that I can recognize and mostly shut down now.
Current Me is more aware of gratefulness and more able to find it in difficult moments. Thanks to all of you and the people who operate the site who have helped me develop this practice.
“Doesn’t do any good . . . . by dwelling on what did or didn’t happen . . . . ” Thank you for the reminder to stay with presence Barb.
Barb, we’re thinking on the same wavelength. There are many different ways a cookie can crumble.
For me it is important to see “how far I have come” in dealing with hardship and loss. The experience is more of a lesson than a burden. Recently, gratefulness, acceptance, surrender, and confidence are more prevalent than dread and fear.
The fact that you see the experience of hardship
as ‘more of a lesson than a burden’,.
dear Yram,
is a perception that is dear to my heart . . .
thank you. ♥
I don’t know that periods of hardship and loss shaped my experience of gratefulness but they led me to this site and the daily quote, the daily question, the articles, the poetry, the programs and videos have definitely shaped my experience and understanding of gratefulness.
I realize there is love all around me, and that I am still here, alive.
Well, hardship and loss brought me here.
I have been shaped by all the events in my life, but the difficult experiences have provided the most opportunities for change. And at this point, my third phase of life, I can even find gratitude for my own suffering and this has expanded my ability to be compassionate.
And like most things, it’s a practice. I practice compassion.
❤️
This is a gift beyond measure,
dear Charlie . . . ♥
“…the difficult experiences have provided the most opportunity for change.” It’s true! Gotta remember those difficult experiences are rich in opportunity. Thanks Charlie.
For the existence of periods of hardship and loss, my gratefulness grows for the blessings of the ability to overcome the hardship and for the values of what and whom I have lost in my life. It is just like how I am grateful for sunny days during excessive rainy days, and vice versa. Happy Monday, everyone! 🌸
My Ngoc, as the old saying goes, opposites attract. It is through god that everything balances out.
Lots of tears and crying followed by dusting yourself off and beginning again. Each new day is a chance to start anew.
In most situations of hardship and loss throughout my life, there have been other people who propped me up, supported me in moving through and beyond difficult times. My deep appreciation for how we can make a difference in others’ lives by showing up was elevated through those experiences. ♥️
Mary Mantei, people come into our lives at different stages for various reasons. Not all are meant to stay. We can certainly appreciate the purpose they served while moving forward.
Amen, Loc.♥️
As the ocean, life has its crest’s and troughs. Impermanence of all life and all manner of things in this dimension. At 68 I have experienced great joy, great loss and gratefulness. These past four years experiencing and practicing gratefulness has made the light and dark of my so called life much more understandable. May we all have enough. Peace, Love & Light.
It seems to me,
from what you wrote,
dear Joseph,
is that your Practice
has taught you well
how to navigate the valleys
as well as the peaks.
Life is good. ♥
From the last time we had this type of question to this time, not only my life hasn’t changed much but has remained stable for a few years now. The hard times taught me to be humble. Pride comes before fall. Combining both helps me balance humility with comfort. I can certainly remain grounded while enjoying the easy times for as long as it lasts.