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“What you focus on grows……. when you are faced with a negative condition, withdraw your attention from it by building the opposite”….. Emmet
She found the song in her heart and began to sing along.
I can love by letting go. Sometimes I think love means holding onto something or someone. While it can in certain instances, I have also learned love is letting go as well. Letting go of my ideas of what love should be so that it will make me feel better is what I will be letting go. Loving in truth is what matters. Loving God can mean letting certain things and people go in life. Loving a partner can mean letting certain things and people go in life. Loving myself can mean letting go of certain people, behaviors, thoughts, and things . When I let go of things, thought, behavior and people that don’t align with my values I am saying that I won’t operate in a space that doesn’t help me grow into my best self. I’m grateful for that
Thank you for this question. Letting go of the mind of expectations is necessary in order to love. I noticed lately that I carry a lot of expectations and it’s a habit!
How can I love truly when I hold this ? Lately I have been doing a lot of repentance and praying/meditation. I see the things that I hold and many of them are not at all beautiful. This has been very difficult to look at because I have always expected way more out of myself! Here it is – more expecting! When I truly take a deeper look at the mind I can see much more of the garbage which needs to be taken out and let go of .
I appreciate that this question adds letting go gracefully and I would add gracefully.
I have to do this with patience with myself and others. Otherwise I try to shove it out with an attitude of hate and disgust. This is not true letting go. I think letting go with gratitude and grace is repentance. Each baby step closer to truth.
People change over time and being in a long term relationship means evolution and learning to accept those changes with gratitude and love. By doing so love flourishes when acceptance and support is Present and learning to let go of the past.
By coming back to the Truth. Some say they don’t see it. Maybe they generally mean they don’t feel it. The inner landscape leaves them cold. But of course it does! Thank God for that. This is a matter of fact and not of feeling, of one’s eternal and natureless Nature and not of the ever-changing kaleidoscope of thoughts and emotions it gives rise to. It’s the truth that sets us free – the Truth that couldn’t be more plain – plain in the sense of cool and undecorated, and plain in the sense of unhidden.
Love is what we are in essence. So you are love, I am love. Arenˋt we one and the same then? What to let go ? If love is mixed with emotion then pain will come . Making Someone emancipated and free may cause sweet pain. There is a sufiprayer which I like very much:
Give me the freedom to fly without a shadow
Give me the freedom to sing without an echo
And the freedom to love without leaving traces
“Wisdom tells me I am nothing. Love tells me I am everything. Between these two banks the river of my life flows.” Nisargadatta Maharaj
Practicing mindfulness helps me let go with love and gratefulness. When I read the quote above several years ago (2015), the following phrases came to me:
Paradox, always the sign of a greater truth.
Blessing, a double edged sword.
Loneliness, the belief in separation.
Worry, the way we waste the moment.
Stillness, a moment to cherish.
Flesh, a gift we often waste.
Spirit, respect for the unseen.
Wisdom, the oneness of creation.
Awareness, Awareness, Awareness,
the only hope for humankind.
Thank you for your observations, Carol. I will be adding them to my notebook of wise words.
A couple of things came to mind with this question…
Our children are an example of loving and letting go. My children are now grown up. The youngest just turned 20, the eldest is 25. They are still, SO young! We want to wrap them up in cotton balls, don’t we? Almost daily I remind myself to let them be ~ whoever they choose to be! I remind myself to reign back unsolicited advice. And how can I do this? By being grateful of them, and by being grateful for the chance to be their mom (particularly poignant as they all came to me only 11 years ago!)
The other thing this question brought to mind is of our losses of loved ones. I have lost so many in my life – a sister, each parent, close friends taken too young, two dear friends just recently. Some days I don’t even want to make new friends, I just get a numbness knowing how impermanent life can be. Other days I mourn. But sometimes, when I am grateful for them, somehow it is both letting go and feeling closer to them at the same time. I’m not sure how to explain it. Yes – sort of like finishing a beloved book. You never forget, you think of it often, but the story came to its conclusion, but it is still with you.
This. Our children are also grown and yet young. My oldest, who is now 31, said something recently about how she was “almost adulting” with a decision, so she also feels that sense of youth and not being ready and yet having to forge ahead. I’ve let go of giving advice unless asked–mostly.
I love the analogy of reading a beloved book. Thank you for this.
Thank you, Barb! 🤗
Practice. Practicing gratitude openly, deliberately and for all will naturally lead to both love and letting go, gratefully.
By loving with my whole heart and embracing impermanence at the same time. Fear of change is a big one for me. Being grateful for the love I’ve had in my life, is part of my practice.
hmm– my pondering led me to consider the concept of the 4 facets through which the light of love falls – good will, being happy for others, compassion, and to have a steadfast open heart -mind free of any conditions– and that maybe as these strengths are built the letting go would diminish, and the loves would be passing through.
It seems to me that loving and letting go are intertwined. People evolve, grow and change, just as I do. Letting go in this sense doesn’t necessarily mean the end of a relationship but the acceptance of its changing nature. The love doesn’t stop. It expands to include the changes. I can be grateful to be part of the process.
I agree. You put into words what I was struggling with-thank you!
Love without expectations, with presence and heart focus. Love without allowing the ego to get in the way.
Let go gratefully by accepting that this particular chapter is over and trusting the next step.
Love with my whole heart and soul and let go with my faith and trust.
Seems to me that in order to answer today’s Daily Question with some degree of accuracy, knowing what kind of love we are talking about letting go would be helpful. Some love is torn away or suddenly lost for reasons many of us know too well. Trying to apply gratefulness to that kind of lost love would be insensitive if not cruel. Still other forms of love we may “let go” of in order to get healthier in our hearts, and eventually find love that is reciprocal and sustainable. Letting our children go, so that they can breathe, thrive and grow, even as we know that doing so sometimes brings uncertainty and discomfort, we do because we love enough to know we must let go.
Today, I choose to focus on all the love in all its forms that surrounds me. And for this, in its totality, I am grateful.
Love, love your comment. I thank you for expanding my understanding of today’s question.
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