Let go of trying too hard to please people. Regaining poise and balance within and turning to face the unfolding with an openness, warmth and loving mindset.
Something more what currently is needed is to let go of any expectations concerning the future and especially concerning the friends who might want to or need to go on without me joining. It needs giving it completely free from my side. This is extremely painful. To acknowledge that if it is not meant to be there is nothing to be done about, nothing could and can change it, and zero control. It simply is not in my hands at all, and there is nothing left to do about. To face that it simply is like that. Due to old traumatic stuff, the most frightening and most painful what could happen was to not be allowed to be part of where I felt I belong, with real friends and family in one kindred spirit and heart. And so it is. This gets to be faced by me. What will be? I don´t know.
Producing more unsprouted seeds of karma, and while other seed remaining unfructified, just as a fan spins after it’s unplugged, it takes awhile to let go of questions, like how did I get like this way.
Well, this one’s obvious. My past. Growing up with my mother left a hole in me wanting to be cared for and cherished, and a lot of fear of letting people down. This is all in the past now that she’s gone, and for the last 10 years I have had my own life. How do I let it go? I still get upset out of proportion to little things that happen at work, with friends, with my husband, and I can be a miserable ball of anxiety at times. It’s definitely better than it was. I just keep trying to enjoy each day and remind myself to be aware of the current moment.
The future. If I’m looking past the moment I’m in toward what comes next, I miss the here and now.
I’m currently reading Go Slowly, Breathe and Smile: Dharma Art by Rashani Réa with the Wisdom of Thich Nhat Hanh. It’s a beautiful book of collage art with quotations and readings. This one fits today’s question for me:
The good news
They do not print.
The good news
We do print.
We have a special edition every moment.
The good news is that you are alive.
-Thich Nhat Hanh
I need to let go of my fears and anxieties.
Especially around housing and my need
for things to be solid and for me to be
in control. When in reality, things are
always in flux. Fear of change?
This may be the real obstacle.
Again, coming back to the present moment
with gratitude.
The Beatles song “Let it Be” comes to mind. Acceptance helps me let go of the things I can’t change. Let it Be and work with what is. Let go of the need to produce and embrace the process. Life is not product. It is process. Nurture it.
I need to let go of the wish to have done things differently. The wish to have been stronger, more confident, to have handled things with ease. It just wasn’t my experience. I will have to add that to the list of things to grieve. That’s not the experience I had, no matter how much I want it to be. And I can feel disappointed, but also be compassionate and forgive myself.
Letting go of who I was and how I was. Letting go of judgment and punishment towards myself. Letting go of wanting control. Control of another, control of outcomes, control of pain, control of my own internal experiences.
Well, this is a lighter and less emotional answer but one I am trying to handle without regret. I just dropped Direct TV cable service. I signed up for Youtube TV, got faster internet, and brought a Roku streaming device. Now I have to learn to use it all without thinking I made the wrong decision. I am constantly trying to control myself judging nature.
I have done a fair amount of self-employed endeavors SunnyPatti, none as complicated as a restaurant. It all seems to work out one way or another. Namaste
I know that I am getting older- things will and are changing. How I go about my daily activities may alter. I cannot go and go as I used to- if I do- at the end of the day I am exhausted. Perhaps I just have to let go of thinking I am still 40…and live NOW…and accept all that is. Our time on this earth is a journey…and I know there are crossroads….I just need to be in the moment and preparing.
I can sure relate to this Nannette. I find myself so weary at the end of the day and am ready to go to bed at 8pm and sometimes sooner. Maybe I need better pacing. Thanks for letting me know that I am not alone. A wonderful gift we give to each other in life.
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Expectations can get in my way of receiving what is happening toward an outcome I didn’t expect.
Let go of trying too hard to please people. Regaining poise and balance within and turning to face the unfolding with an openness, warmth and loving mindset.
Something more what currently is needed is to let go of any expectations concerning the future and especially concerning the friends who might want to or need to go on without me joining. It needs giving it completely free from my side. This is extremely painful. To acknowledge that if it is not meant to be there is nothing to be done about, nothing could and can change it, and zero control. It simply is not in my hands at all, and there is nothing left to do about. To face that it simply is like that. Due to old traumatic stuff, the most frightening and most painful what could happen was to not be allowed to be part of where I felt I belong, with real friends and family in one kindred spirit and heart. And so it is. This gets to be faced by me. What will be? I don´t know.
Fear. Perfectionism. Wanting things to be different or a certain way, rather than accepting them as they are.
Producing more unsprouted seeds of karma, and while other seed remaining unfructified, just as a fan spins after it’s unplugged, it takes awhile to let go of questions, like how did I get like this way.
Well, this one’s obvious. My past. Growing up with my mother left a hole in me wanting to be cared for and cherished, and a lot of fear of letting people down. This is all in the past now that she’s gone, and for the last 10 years I have had my own life. How do I let it go? I still get upset out of proportion to little things that happen at work, with friends, with my husband, and I can be a miserable ball of anxiety at times. It’s definitely better than it was. I just keep trying to enjoy each day and remind myself to be aware of the current moment.
The future. If I’m looking past the moment I’m in toward what comes next, I miss the here and now.
I’m currently reading Go Slowly, Breathe and Smile: Dharma Art by Rashani Réa with the Wisdom of Thich Nhat Hanh. It’s a beautiful book of collage art with quotations and readings. This one fits today’s question for me:
The good news
They do not print.
The good news
We do print.
We have a special edition every moment.
The good news is that you are alive.
-Thich Nhat Hanh
Oh but they DO print good news: https://www.goodnewsnetwork.org/
Thanks for this, Barb. Such simple wisdom. The book sounds gently inspiring! Warmly, KC
I need to let go of my fears and anxieties.
Especially around housing and my need
for things to be solid and for me to be
in control. When in reality, things are
always in flux. Fear of change?
This may be the real obstacle.
Again, coming back to the present moment
with gratitude.
The Beatles song “Let it Be” comes to mind. Acceptance helps me let go of the things I can’t change. Let it Be and work with what is. Let go of the need to produce and embrace the process. Life is not product. It is process. Nurture it.
I have a copy of that song on my fridge as it was read as my mother’s funeral. She loved the Beatles (and Elvis too)
Those four young men from Liverpool sure have had longevity with their music!
I need to let go of the wish to have done things differently. The wish to have been stronger, more confident, to have handled things with ease. It just wasn’t my experience. I will have to add that to the list of things to grieve. That’s not the experience I had, no matter how much I want it to be. And I can feel disappointed, but also be compassionate and forgive myself.
Letting go of who I was and how I was. Letting go of judgment and punishment towards myself. Letting go of wanting control. Control of another, control of outcomes, control of pain, control of my own internal experiences.
Well, this is a lighter and less emotional answer but one I am trying to handle without regret. I just dropped Direct TV cable service. I signed up for Youtube TV, got faster internet, and brought a Roku streaming device. Now I have to learn to use it all without thinking I made the wrong decision. I am constantly trying to control myself judging nature.
Rabbit, I hear you!
Fear & Control. I was good at not letting those things get in the way until I became self-employed.
I have done a fair amount of self-employed endeavors SunnyPatti, none as complicated as a restaurant. It all seems to work out one way or another. Namaste
‘it is what it is’ comes to mind when I read the question.
Trust the Universe.
Have a wonderful relaxing weekend everyone.
I know that I am getting older- things will and are changing. How I go about my daily activities may alter. I cannot go and go as I used to- if I do- at the end of the day I am exhausted. Perhaps I just have to let go of thinking I am still 40…and live NOW…and accept all that is. Our time on this earth is a journey…and I know there are crossroads….I just need to be in the moment and preparing.
I can sure relate to this Nannette. I find myself so weary at the end of the day and am ready to go to bed at 8pm and sometimes sooner. Maybe I need better pacing. Thanks for letting me know that I am not alone. A wonderful gift we give to each other in life.
My preoccupations with what was and what might be rather than being present to what is.
Hell is timely, for hell is the thought
that hell will go on, on and on, without end.
Heaven is only present, instantaneous and eternal,
a mayfly, a blue dayflower, a life entirely given,
complete forever in its hour.
— Wendell Berry
Thank you Laura for sharing.
Love the Berry quote. Best definition of heaven I’ve ever heard. Makes me think of my mentor who always said, “I’ll see you in paradise.”
Beautiful. Thank you 🙏