Robin, it goes to show that importance and urgency don’t have to go together. Back when I was in an Adult Day Treatment(ADT) program back in 2019 into 2020 for 8 weeks, I learned about the 4 quadrants.
1. Important and urgent
2. Important but not urgent
3. Not important but urgent
4. Neither important nor urgent
The 2nd one is the healthiest of all. We have enough responsibilities to go around that don’t have to be finished immediately.
When my Life was in full swing
I could be the busiest person you would ever meet . . .
rushing through everything
just following bullet points in my head —
teeth brushed
cats fed
coffee
keys
diapers
baby
blanket
and run out the door
without a thought to anything else,
usually skipping breakfast,
making the bed,
and other little chores that most people take the time to do.
I spread myself so thin
that my days just floated by in a cloud of chaotic energy
that neither made me a better person
nor a happier, more content person.
All that had to go,
and it did,
not exactly by choice,
but by necessity.
I don’t know how I would be
if I had to live my youth again,
but I hope that growing older
and more spiritually in tune with my world,
I would not fall into the old ways.
Now,
I have made myself less busy
and hold myself in the moment when I stray,
by stopping to breathe,
really B-R-E-A-T-H-E . . .
sit if I have to
and breathe,
and then the moment becomes clear to me again.
I make an effort
to fully engage in the task of the moment
and pay attention to the flower I am planting,
or the dishes I am washing,
the cats I am feeding
or the supper I am cooking.
It takes a little longer,
but what is time?
The time I spend in a moment
is food for my soul . . .
it releases me from the chaos of a busy mind,
and I am much more content at day’s end. ♥
There are always moments, even during the busiest days, to slow down, take a breath, and come back to my senses. What am I seeing, hearing, feeling, smelling? It only requires the intention to take notice. Again and again and again.
Winter break is over, and I’m starting to get busy with schoolwork. I spend most of my time on the computer. Standing up, walking downstairs for some water, simply spinning my chair to look through the window, or looking at my cute succulent plants helps me return to the present moment. May everyone have a wonderful day filled with peace and joy. 🌿
you too – I thought of you and Loc the other day – my Dad has Vietnamese neighbors and brought back a couple of beautiful salad bowls for him. – I wish the Grateful Team would let us post pics here – I know they do on the other tab/community forum but I don’t have time to go on both.
My Ngoc, that winter break was fun while it lasted. One good thing about this semester is that we have more time at home together even though you’ll probably be busier.
When life gets busy that IS the present moment. I immerse completely in my work at times and am very present, in flow state. Yes, at times I divide my attention and finish an email while I’m also starting a meeting, or I’m talking to my husband while cooking. I’m living the one life I have to live even then.
Just thinking about returning to the present moment gets me most of the way there. It’s always about remembering. (Re- again, Membering- becoming a member of all). Once I remember to be conscious and to live in the present moment, I look around, see with gratefulness, hear the sounds around me, put my hands on something and feel the reality of an object, take a deep breath, and then continue with my day. Thank you for this question, and the reminder to get out of my head and live through my body with love, joy, and gratefulness.
Happy Friday to all!
Thank you for this reading of the word “remember”, Mary. I’m thinking of what it means to dismember–to tear apart. To remember is to reassemble, to bring back together. Remembering: Bringing our attention back to reunite it with the here and now when it has been pulled away.
Stop, look, go. Box breathing. Using one or more of the five senses. (It just occurred to me that stop, look, go could just as easily be: stop, listen, go; stop, touch, go, etc.)
Before I address today’s question I want to thank you for all your uplifting messages. I’m gaining strength and will attempt to take a short walk today. I crave fresh air! As for the question, the last couple of weeks its been very hard for me to stay in the present moment. I find that many times the voices that fight for attention in my head can be delivering such negative, hateful and fear based messages. They go all the way back to childhood and the bullying I endured. My practice of gratefulness has helped me a lot as it has planted a life-giving voice in the midst of them. I am so thankful for that voice! But I have found that often times the dialogue going on in my head is beneath the radar so I have to deliberately check in/pause and listen to the inner dialogue–what those voices are saying to me. My mentor told me years ago that there is a part of me that has never been afraid. That makes sense to me because I believe there is a part of me and you that is whole–one with creation. I can call her forth and actually feel her arms around me, telling me that together we can make it. I found the following mindfulness meditation in my journals. It’s a reminder of the importance of accepting “what is.”
Mindfulness Exercise: Befriending The Life You’re Living
1. Pause for a moment and sense what is happening in your body and mind, what is happening around you. Quite intentionally adopt a posture that has a sense of openness, care, and dignity.
2. Attending to your body, sense how your body feels touching the chair, the touch of the air on your skin, any sensations in the face and shoulders. You might begin to sense what your mood is—perhaps tired, restless, or calm. The background whisper of thoughts or images becomes discernible. You may discover yourself becoming sensitized to the sights and sounds of the moment.
3. Take a moment to stand back, be still, turning your attention to the life of the body with curiosity, patience, and care. Sense how the air and your clothing are touching your skin, the sounds you are hearing. Sense the posture of your spine, the expression on your face, the placing of your hands. Be mindful of the places in your body that are well and sense the easefulness of those places.
4. Expand your attention to the places in the body that feel contracted or painful. Explore what it is to tend to those places with care, curiosity, and kindness.
5. Now, if it is helpful, say a few phrases under your breath—not trying to change anything—just saying the phrases and seeing how things are for you: “Safe and well.” “Contented and peaceful.” “Caring and kind.”
6. Continue with this for as long as it feels appropriate, with your body as an anchor. Be mindful of how sensations are moment to moment, ebbing and flowing. Explore what it is to steady the attention within the body—standing or sitting—the body sensing, breathing. When your attention is drawn elsewhere, bring the same simple knowing—a thought as a thought, an image as an image—returning once more to an awareness of the body of the moment, just as it is, without demand or expectation.
7. Sense what it is to expand your attention to include the thoughts, images, and mood present in this moment, including the difficult, unpleasant ones that you are prone to become lost in or judge. Explore what it is to be mindful of all of this with the same caring attentiveness.
8. If it is helpful, again bring forward the same simple articulated intentions:
“Safe and well.” “Contented and peaceful.” “Caring and kind.”
9. Remember, this is not about changing what is present, but about cultivating our capacity to befriend what is present. It is not about having a particular feeling, but about strengthening our capacity to care for what is present.
10. As you bring the practice to a close, form an intention to continue to practice in the midst of your day‐to‐day life.
Excerpted from Mindfulness: Ancient Wisdom Meets Modern Psychology by Christina Feldman and Willem Kuyken. Copyright (c) 2019 The Guilford Press.
Thank you for the beautiful mindfulness practice, Carol Ann. I will copy this and keep it, and look forward to using it.
Sending love and peace your way, Mary
It is all part of the healing process,
dear Carol Ann . . .
I know that when I feel weakened and vulnerable
those voices come to me too.
It happened before I received my new hip.
Once healing really took hold,
and I felt more hopeful,
the voices settled down.
You are strong and beautiful and wise,
dear one . . .
you will survive
with love . . . ♥
sparrow
Charlie, I did get to walk. I made it 4 blocks! Considering how cold and windy it is, I thought that was pretty good. We are suppose to have snow showers and possible ice on raised services this afternoon. Glad you enjoyed the piece. I found it very helpful.
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Visiting our website and reading your reflections. It helps me slow down from this busy world and think about what is important 💕
Robin, it goes to show that importance and urgency don’t have to go together. Back when I was in an Adult Day Treatment(ADT) program back in 2019 into 2020 for 8 weeks, I learned about the 4 quadrants.
1. Important and urgent
2. Important but not urgent
3. Not important but urgent
4. Neither important nor urgent
The 2nd one is the healthiest of all. We have enough responsibilities to go around that don’t have to be finished immediately.
When my Life was in full swing
I could be the busiest person you would ever meet . . .
rushing through everything
just following bullet points in my head —
teeth brushed
cats fed
coffee
keys
diapers
baby
blanket
and run out the door
without a thought to anything else,
usually skipping breakfast,
making the bed,
and other little chores that most people take the time to do.
I spread myself so thin
that my days just floated by in a cloud of chaotic energy
that neither made me a better person
nor a happier, more content person.
All that had to go,
and it did,
not exactly by choice,
but by necessity.
I don’t know how I would be
if I had to live my youth again,
but I hope that growing older
and more spiritually in tune with my world,
I would not fall into the old ways.
Now,
I have made myself less busy
and hold myself in the moment when I stray,
by stopping to breathe,
really B-R-E-A-T-H-E . . .
sit if I have to
and breathe,
and then the moment becomes clear to me again.
I make an effort
to fully engage in the task of the moment
and pay attention to the flower I am planting,
or the dishes I am washing,
the cats I am feeding
or the supper I am cooking.
It takes a little longer,
but what is time?
The time I spend in a moment
is food for my soul . . .
it releases me from the chaos of a busy mind,
and I am much more content at day’s end. ♥
“and I am much more content at day’s end.” Me too, me too.
♥
Gratefulness of having the method to let go of this mind world ! I’m so grateful to be able to come back and let go ! Thank you universe!
Taking deep breaths, looking at the natural world, listening to music all bring me to the present moment.
There are always moments, even during the busiest days, to slow down, take a breath, and come back to my senses. What am I seeing, hearing, feeling, smelling? It only requires the intention to take notice. Again and again and again.
“Again and again and again.”
It’s and ongoing process,
and I never grow tired of the reminders . . .
I don’t think you do either.
They are our salvation. ♥
Winter break is over, and I’m starting to get busy with schoolwork. I spend most of my time on the computer. Standing up, walking downstairs for some water, simply spinning my chair to look through the window, or looking at my cute succulent plants helps me return to the present moment. May everyone have a wonderful day filled with peace and joy. 🌿
you too – I thought of you and Loc the other day – my Dad has Vietnamese neighbors and brought back a couple of beautiful salad bowls for him. – I wish the Grateful Team would let us post pics here – I know they do on the other tab/community forum but I don’t have time to go on both.
Ever since you mentioned getting your little succulents,
dear Ngoc,
I always think of you
with them in the picture. ♥
My Ngoc, that winter break was fun while it lasted. One good thing about this semester is that we have more time at home together even though you’ll probably be busier.
When life gets busy that IS the present moment. I immerse completely in my work at times and am very present, in flow state. Yes, at times I divide my attention and finish an email while I’m also starting a meeting, or I’m talking to my husband while cooking. I’m living the one life I have to live even then.
Well said,
dear Barb . . . 🙂
My breath.
Focusing on what is right in front of me.
Happy Friday All. 🙏🏻
🕊️♥️
Focusing on what is right in front of you
is indeed,
presence,
dear PKR. ♥
Happy Friday PKR!
Just thinking about returning to the present moment gets me most of the way there. It’s always about remembering. (Re- again, Membering- becoming a member of all). Once I remember to be conscious and to live in the present moment, I look around, see with gratefulness, hear the sounds around me, put my hands on something and feel the reality of an object, take a deep breath, and then continue with my day. Thank you for this question, and the reminder to get out of my head and live through my body with love, joy, and gratefulness.
Happy Friday to all!
Thank you for this reading of the word “remember”, Mary. I’m thinking of what it means to dismember–to tear apart. To remember is to reassemble, to bring back together. Remembering: Bringing our attention back to reunite it with the here and now when it has been pulled away.
Happy Friday Mary!
Stop, look, go. Box breathing. Using one or more of the five senses. (It just occurred to me that stop, look, go could just as easily be: stop, listen, go; stop, touch, go, etc.)
I really like your introduction of other senses, Drea! The exercise of identifying one thing you can see, one you can hear, and so on comes to mind.
In another context I read the sequence Pause-Clarify-Decide (FranklinCovey advice on making sure we prioritize the “big rocks” https://www.franklincovey.com/courses/the-5-choices/choice-1/). I immediately thought of Stop-Look-Go.
You always provide such interesting reference material,
dear Barb . . . ♥
Drea, I know the box breathing. Usually, it’s 4 seconds hold inhale hold exhale.
Yes, that’s the one. I was taught to hold a little longer after the out breath. Good practice however you do it.
My life isn’t busy yet, but when it does, I’m sure something will come up. “I make it up as I go” Indiana Jones.
What helps me is taking a deep breath, relaxing my shoulders, relaxing the muscles in my face and jaws and then closing my eyes and smiling.
“smiling” . . . 🙂
☀️
Sit down and take in a moment of quiet.
Love the perfect act of simplicity- just stop and be quiet 🤫 . Peace ☮️
Before I address today’s question I want to thank you for all your uplifting messages. I’m gaining strength and will attempt to take a short walk today. I crave fresh air! As for the question, the last couple of weeks its been very hard for me to stay in the present moment. I find that many times the voices that fight for attention in my head can be delivering such negative, hateful and fear based messages. They go all the way back to childhood and the bullying I endured. My practice of gratefulness has helped me a lot as it has planted a life-giving voice in the midst of them. I am so thankful for that voice! But I have found that often times the dialogue going on in my head is beneath the radar so I have to deliberately check in/pause and listen to the inner dialogue–what those voices are saying to me. My mentor told me years ago that there is a part of me that has never been afraid. That makes sense to me because I believe there is a part of me and you that is whole–one with creation. I can call her forth and actually feel her arms around me, telling me that together we can make it. I found the following mindfulness meditation in my journals. It’s a reminder of the importance of accepting “what is.”
Mindfulness Exercise: Befriending The Life You’re Living
1. Pause for a moment and sense what is happening in your body and mind, what is happening around you. Quite intentionally adopt a posture that has a sense of openness, care, and dignity.
2. Attending to your body, sense how your body feels touching the chair, the touch of the air on your skin, any sensations in the face and shoulders. You might begin to sense what your mood is—perhaps tired, restless, or calm. The background whisper of thoughts or images becomes discernible. You may discover yourself becoming sensitized to the sights and sounds of the moment.
3. Take a moment to stand back, be still, turning your attention to the life of the body with curiosity, patience, and care. Sense how the air and your clothing are touching your skin, the sounds you are hearing. Sense the posture of your spine, the expression on your face, the placing of your hands. Be mindful of the places in your body that are well and sense the easefulness of those places.
4. Expand your attention to the places in the body that feel contracted or painful. Explore what it is to tend to those places with care, curiosity, and kindness.
5. Now, if it is helpful, say a few phrases under your breath—not trying to change anything—just saying the phrases and seeing how things are for you: “Safe and well.” “Contented and peaceful.” “Caring and kind.”
6. Continue with this for as long as it feels appropriate, with your body as an anchor. Be mindful of how sensations are moment to moment, ebbing and flowing. Explore what it is to steady the attention within the body—standing or sitting—the body sensing, breathing. When your attention is drawn elsewhere, bring the same simple knowing—a thought as a thought, an image as an image—returning once more to an awareness of the body of the moment, just as it is, without demand or expectation.
7. Sense what it is to expand your attention to include the thoughts, images, and mood present in this moment, including the difficult, unpleasant ones that you are prone to become lost in or judge. Explore what it is to be mindful of all of this with the same caring attentiveness.
8. If it is helpful, again bring forward the same simple articulated intentions:
“Safe and well.” “Contented and peaceful.” “Caring and kind.”
9. Remember, this is not about changing what is present, but about cultivating our capacity to befriend what is present. It is not about having a particular feeling, but about strengthening our capacity to care for what is present.
10. As you bring the practice to a close, form an intention to continue to practice in the midst of your day‐to‐day life.
Excerpted from Mindfulness: Ancient Wisdom Meets Modern Psychology by Christina Feldman and Willem Kuyken. Copyright (c) 2019 The Guilford Press.
Thank you so much Carol – I really needed that today. 💗🤗
I am sharing this with my kids too
Thank you muchly, dear Carol Ann.
I second that- “Safe and well.” “Contented and peaceful.” “Caring and kind.”
Thank you for the beautiful mindfulness practice, Carol Ann. I will copy this and keep it, and look forward to using it.
Sending love and peace your way, Mary
You are such a gift to all of us.
What a precious thing to say, Deann. It lifted my spirit! I’ve felt so limited and challenged for the last two weeks.
It is all part of the healing process,
dear Carol Ann . . .
I know that when I feel weakened and vulnerable
those voices come to me too.
It happened before I received my new hip.
Once healing really took hold,
and I felt more hopeful,
the voices settled down.
You are strong and beautiful and wise,
dear one . . .
you will survive
with love . . . ♥
sparrow
Thank you!
Thank you for this, Carol Ann.
I resonate with all of it.
I hope you can get outside for a walk today.
Charlie, I did get to walk. I made it 4 blocks! Considering how cold and windy it is, I thought that was pretty good. We are suppose to have snow showers and possible ice on raised services this afternoon. Glad you enjoyed the piece. I found it very helpful.
Glad you’re feeling stronger, Carol Ann.
My breath. Pausing. Allowing. And sometimes things like my dogs wanting attention 🙂
I saw the drone footage of the Walk for Peace in Charlotte, I thought of you and hoped you were there.