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Letting things go, time can’t be back for making changes. Even though it was wonderful, I can’t stay there forever for cheerful, and if it was terrible, I can’t get back to make it better. The present moment is a present. I wasn’t here for a few days because I was busy with a concert and schoolwork. Just now, I am still feeling bad for my math midterm exam because I didn’t do well, and I even missed a chance to get five more points extra because I couldn’t finish the extra credit exercise. And then I became aware that I still have another subject homework to work on, I still have many things to do. I can’t let only math score hold me down in all my tasks. That was not a big life lesson that I have an opportunity to learn. However, it is difficult to learn. Because not only me, but us, we easily get stuck in the past or desire for the future rather than live in the current moment.
That I can enjoy life, moment with friends, staying in nature, singing, playing tennis,even if I am not at my best with my health, or I am passing through challenging circumstances.
Very early in life I learned not to let worry ruin the present moment.
I was in 3rd/4th grade-ish. My family was at an outing with friends that lasted much longer than expected – well into the evening, and I was enjoying the outing, but I had a test Monday AM for which I hadn’t yet studied. While swinging I realized that it wouldn’t be the end of the world if I did poorly on my test. So I continued to enjoy the evening and not worry. It was an amazing moment that has stayed with me.
Many chores that I had to do because I didn’t have a choice, are now life activities I enjoy doing. One of them is doing the dishes. I remember in high school, washing dishes after dinner and thinking, “Well, I’ll have to do this for the rest of my life, so maybe I need to just enjoy it.” And I do. It is a satisfying and often a calming, centering activity for me.
“I might not be right”. The hurley burley of corporate life tends to build an arrogance and haste to quick “answers”. But pausing and reflecting on the right/wrong thinking clears a space to recognize that in my haste, I may not be right.
There are so many, and I am grateful for them all. If I have to pick one, it is learning to take care of myself – physically, emotionally and spiritually. At a very young age, I looked around and saw that I was not getting the nurturing I needed, and made a decision “I guess I have to take care of myself. It has served me well. This is not to say that I reject help and support – I welcome it. But I recognize that only I am responsible for my life
I’ve learned so many lessons. Some I’ve had to learn over and over. As I’ve gotten older, and more sober, they seem to have a better chance of affecting my behaviors. I guess if I had to pick one, it might be that I should trust life. Outcomes are not totally in our control and we are at the mercy of the cosmos. If I let the river carry me, and work with the current, I will eventually get to the other side. It might not be exactly where I planned and it might not be like I imagined. Through gratitude, I am able to see more clearly, just how lucky I am.
I want to answer “all of them” but I appreciate the specificity of asking for just one. I’ll go with “this too shall pass”. The knowledge that I’ve gotten through incredibly difficult and painful times tells me that I can get through the next whatever-it-is and come out the other side still me, possibly somewhat stronger or wiser or more aware of what matters most or more aware of the fragility of things we count on and how much it matters that we love and are loved.
This question has brought to mind a book that I read a few years ago called The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. Based on ancient Toltec wisdom, he offered these 4 “life lessons” to me:
1. Be Impeccable With Your Word.
2. Don’t Take Anything Personally.
3. Don’t Make Assumptions.
4. Always Do Your Best.
Lately, God and Spirit have been reminding me of this little book. I passed on my copy to a friend…perhaps it is time for me to get another for myself.
~Blessings on your day everyone 🙏
I love this book, and am glad to be reminded of its wisdom once again. Thank you.
Diane, I was introduced to Toltec Wisdom while living in AZ and attended Toltec gatherings. I found that if I practiced being impeccable with my word, the other three agreements just automatically followed. It’s hard to be impeccable with your word if you take things personally, make assumptions and do not commit to doing your best! I keep Ruiz’s books on my bookshelf and turn to them periodically.
Diane, Thank you for calling out the name of that book. I just (re-)ordered it. When I moved here so many of my books did not come with me. I’m grateful for this reminder!
Those pithy statements have stuck with me and come to mind when I need them. Possibly time to reread in case they’re NOT coming to mind at other times when I also need them!
Several years ago I and husband, moved into his childhood home to take care of his mom. I gave her great care. It was exhausting and fulfilling at the same time.
I am now in a caregiving situation also.
What I am learning is, I can only be as strong as I take care of myself. I cannot give what I don’t have.
I was grateful to learn that everything is temporary. You’ll never be as you are today ever again, every day is a new chance. So take it in your hands.
What is one life lesson I am grateful I had the opportunity to learn?
I am so grateful for the day when I realized that Life is trustworthy…Why? Because that was the day I began to trust myself.
We all are life. Franciscan priest Richard Rohr often says, “We offer our prayer together in all the Holy Names of God.” He’s not preaching or teaching dogma. He’s honoring and claiming the wisdom of all paths that lead this sacred mystery called Life to fruition and promise.
This site is a perfect example of caring and sharing our one Life. Breathing in and breathing out this infinite spirit that our finite mind cannot define. This Breath of Life that is calling us all forth to honor and embrace hundreds of years of evolutionary experience and growth. It is doing its best to assure us that if we go with the flow, roll with the punches, we will be shown a way. When I read the story of creation from various religious disciplines I always come away forsaking victimhood. There is no “Why me?” There is only “May I learn from this situation and not turn it in to a problem.
Life, for me, is trustworthy.
I share a poem I wrote:
That’s Life by Carol Ann Conner
Life is for giving not for getting.
Memories are for lessons worth learning.
Wishes are possibilities worth having.
Expectations are judgments in disguise.
With hands and heart open, I greet this day.
Thank you, Carol for this beautiful poem and your wise words. I need to write this down. Blessings and thank you.
“Expectations are judgments in disguise”.
I love this. Thank you, Carol.
And welcome, Peter. As Carol said, there is much compassion and also wisdom here.
Thank you, Carol. Your thoughts always hit the mark and are exactly what I needed to read this morning. Yesterday I I received an unexpected medical diagnosis.
Welcome, Peter. We are all here to support you. Please don’t hesitate to share your concerns with us. The people who visit this site are good and wise and trustworthy. Blessings to you,
Peter, The folks who frequent this site are caring and compassionate folk so don’t hesitate to share your journey with us. Sending loving energy your way. Sincerely, Carol
“Expectations are judgements in disguise”. Profound wisdom Carol that went straight to my heart. Thank you.
Active “recovery” takes many forms.
For me..one of life’s greatest lessons is to be aware and be grateful. Everything can be taken away in an instant…To be grateful for this new day, for all that has been given to me, and I am especially grateful that for right now…I live in a peaceful place. I am grateful that I have this site to come to daily and interact with such a wonderful group of people. Being grateful is my life’s lesson.
I think one of my greatest lessons has been learning to pause.
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