There is a little seed of a dream
that lies buried deep within me,
but I thought I had let it go
many years ago,
along with a small garden of other dreams.
Unexpectedly
a few have become possibilities
that have bloomed
despite my denial and neglect . . .
they have been coaxed out of me,
just like the sun
kindly seduced a man to take off his coat
after a brutal wind
couldn’t.
One of these
was to have a house
to make into a home
and just enough land to till
and nurture.
Others
are now taking root
and making their way to the surface,
and they frighten me beyond measure.
I’ve played wac-a-mole with them,
but they keep cropping up.
Possibility sits on its mushroom
and blinks its eyes blandly,
as if to say,
“I not thinking what you think I am”
but I know better.
Anna Moses found possibility,
as did Tom Allen,
Dawn Blackman,
and other people
who had lived their lives
and who may have thought they were ‘done’,
but who nurtured their seeds,
many of which had been tucked away like mine.
I’m not speaking of success or fame,
but of realizing
that the life force
the energy that drives us
doesn’t really die . . .
it may go dormant
while we go about the business
of working,
raising children,
finding our place in the world.
It’s still there
somewhere
in that juicy little parlor
of lost dreams.
I think I’m ready now
to listen to those voices,
encourage them to speak a little louder,
and allow them to wrap their tender green leaves
of my being. ♥
Oh my,
dear Drea . . .
hard to explain,
but to me
a juicy parlor
is where dreams that excite me
and get my creative juices flowing,
becoming a bit of a sad place
when they are lost or let go . . .
does that help? ♥
I’m stretching to understand. The way I relate to what you wrote is — I need to grieve the dreams that I was clamoring onto so that I can open for something new and fresh. It feels like a big loss, followed by a big release. But there is this midwifing aspect to letting go. But once they’re let go, they are gone, they are images without emotional attachment. So I hear your words as perhaps dreams somewhere in this process? A shadow of grief for the dream that was lost, or is still in the process of being lost?
Perhaps that’s part of it,
dear Drea . . .
I don’t know.
There is juicy anticipation
and the shedding of tears in there somewhere . . .
perhaps a bit of the bitter
and the sweet. ♥
1
L
Louise
2 weeks ago
Today I am trying not to piss too many people off so that I can have a reference for future job opportunities!
I’ve been writing in my journal each morning with a reflection on one of yoga’s yamas and niyamas, working my way through how I relate to and practice them, specifically with respect to social justice. They are a good expression of my values and this work of self-examination will contribute to future writing for a bigger audience than me, myself and I.
Other than that, mostly I need to take of the existing possibilities and commitments in my life.
I saw a Zumba class that is close to home on weds evenings on our town facebook page and I can try the first class for free. I did zumba with my other insurance 2 yrs ago so it has been awhile but it is definitely worth looking in to!
Well, I notice others have mentioned yoga so I will too. I started stretching exercises a few weeks back. I can’t afford the gym where my friends go. So this is my solution. I have a book that I like and hope to continue in it.
I wasn’t going to answer today’s question, because I didn’t want to make a commitment. So I was just going to read the everyone else’s response instead. M2’s response inspired me to take a small step. I have been away from yoga for many years. I would like to add 1 yoga posture to my physical therapy exercises. Attaching it to my pt exercises will make it much more likely that I will actually do it. Now I get to decide which posture (is the word asana?) that I will do. It will be fun to choose one. 😀
Mary, now you have inspired me! I never thought of approaching yoga this way and I certainly could. I stretch every morning before anything else, even before coffee, which speaks to its place in my life. Thank you for the idea. 🌺
I’m heading to the land of my birth to gather with members of my youth, now all chronological adults, to celebrate the anniv of our high school reunion. I’ve been engaging in a few phone calls and online communication with a couple people. Perhaps there’s some new friendships that are taking roots. even after all these years. Those closest to me died years ago due to health inequity in their lives. and no one knew it at the time. Have a great day all–I have heard it said, the best is yet to come. Bring it on Universe! ☮️🌻💕
Well, besides working today, I will be putting the final touches on my raised bed garden. So I’ll have the possibility of gardening in the future.
I could also visit the local ashram and see what that’s all about. Ive read good things. I’ve been meaning to check it out for a while now. Something to help reinforce and grow my (atrophied) meditation practice. We’ll see.
I can show up as my best human self to a driving rehabilitation assessment this morning. The aim is to return to being able to drive on the highway. When/ as I work towards this, blessed with support to do so, I will hold the gift of the support and the possibility of the return of many freedoms it offers. It has been three and a bit years. I pray for the inner and outer readiness and capacity to take this on, and be open to where it leads and the possibility it may offer in the future. It is only as I write this that I realize what a huge loss this has been.
A dear friend of mine takes up most of the conversational time in our relationship, and I just haven’t had it in me to tell her that I need more reciprocity. This has been going on for years. I finally need to tell her–I have grown dissatisfied with our relationship. To nurture a new possibility in our friendship, I can do some self-examination and be clear on what I need, and then tell her.
That is a difficult one. It happened to my sister and she told me about the confrontation (her friend felt like what you are describing). They are no longer friends.
Oh, darn it, I’m sorry that happened to your sister. But then again, maybe it ended up being for the best. Friendship needs to have some balance, otherwise it’s one person benefitting at the expense of the other.
That’s a big one, Drea. Do you think she has sensed your dissatisfaction?
Good idea to do some self examination so you are clear within yourself about what you want in this relationship.
Oh boy,
dear Drea . . .
this is a tough one.
I wish you the best
in working it out.
I tend to be non-confrontational about these things,
and accept what the friend has to offer,
finding reciprocity in other friendships,
but I don’t think this is an ideal solution.
Godspeed. ♥
One new possibility for my life is to trust the now and what is unfolding. What is currently unfolding is amazing and it’s full of love and support. I feel so blessed and grateful. I can’t believe how fortunate I am. I will do my best to focus on the universe and its enduring energy and light. I’m working on sharing this love and letting go of my minds that can’t believe or trust- letting go of the past frees up the present moment which is pregnant with possibilities. Shine like the sun ! ☀️
Sounds good to me, M2.
When I was in 3rd grade in Catholic school, my teacher started calling me and the other 2 Marys in my class Mary1, Mary2, and Mary3. I’m not sure how long this lasted. 🧐 🩵
Mary, I’m feeling humorous today, and I hope my warped humor is taking lightly. I’m hearing the phrase from a spooky movie, “whatever happened to baby jane.” In it there’s a line “You are what you are Blanche!” Go for it M2!
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There is a little seed of a dream
that lies buried deep within me,
but I thought I had let it go
many years ago,
along with a small garden of other dreams.
Unexpectedly
a few have become possibilities
that have bloomed
despite my denial and neglect . . .
they have been coaxed out of me,
just like the sun
kindly seduced a man to take off his coat
after a brutal wind
couldn’t.
One of these
was to have a house
to make into a home
and just enough land to till
and nurture.
Others
are now taking root
and making their way to the surface,
and they frighten me beyond measure.
I’ve played wac-a-mole with them,
but they keep cropping up.
Possibility sits on its mushroom
and blinks its eyes blandly,
as if to say,
“I not thinking what you think I am”
but I know better.
Anna Moses found possibility,
as did Tom Allen,
Dawn Blackman,
and other people
who had lived their lives
and who may have thought they were ‘done’,
but who nurtured their seeds,
many of which had been tucked away like mine.
I’m not speaking of success or fame,
but of realizing
that the life force
the energy that drives us
doesn’t really die . . .
it may go dormant
while we go about the business
of working,
raising children,
finding our place in the world.
It’s still there
somewhere
in that juicy little parlor
of lost dreams.
I think I’m ready now
to listen to those voices,
encourage them to speak a little louder,
and allow them to wrap their tender green leaves
of my being. ♥
Sparrow, I am intrigued. What is in the juicy parlor of lost dreams??
Oh my,
dear Drea . . .
hard to explain,
but to me
a juicy parlor
is where dreams that excite me
and get my creative juices flowing,
becoming a bit of a sad place
when they are lost or let go . . .
does that help? ♥
I’m stretching to understand. The way I relate to what you wrote is — I need to grieve the dreams that I was clamoring onto so that I can open for something new and fresh. It feels like a big loss, followed by a big release. But there is this midwifing aspect to letting go. But once they’re let go, they are gone, they are images without emotional attachment. So I hear your words as perhaps dreams somewhere in this process? A shadow of grief for the dream that was lost, or is still in the process of being lost?
Perhaps that’s part of it,
dear Drea . . .
I don’t know.
There is juicy anticipation
and the shedding of tears in there somewhere . . .
perhaps a bit of the bitter
and the sweet. ♥
Today I am trying not to piss too many people off so that I can have a reference for future job opportunities!
I’ve been writing in my journal each morning with a reflection on one of yoga’s yamas and niyamas, working my way through how I relate to and practice them, specifically with respect to social justice. They are a good expression of my values and this work of self-examination will contribute to future writing for a bigger audience than me, myself and I.
Other than that, mostly I need to take of the existing possibilities and commitments in my life.
I saw a Zumba class that is close to home on weds evenings on our town facebook page and I can try the first class for free. I did zumba with my other insurance 2 yrs ago so it has been awhile but it is definitely worth looking in to!
Well, I notice others have mentioned yoga so I will too. I started stretching exercises a few weeks back. I can’t afford the gym where my friends go. So this is my solution. I have a book that I like and hope to continue in it.
Christina – ‘Improved Heath’ – on YouTube – over 500 free workouts, from Very gentle to intense!!
Yes, Youtube has some wonderful videos… came to say the same! It’s what got me through CoVid when everything shut down.
I wasn’t going to answer today’s question, because I didn’t want to make a commitment. So I was just going to read the everyone else’s response instead. M2’s response inspired me to take a small step. I have been away from yoga for many years. I would like to add 1 yoga posture to my physical therapy exercises. Attaching it to my pt exercises will make it much more likely that I will actually do it. Now I get to decide which posture (is the word asana?) that I will do. It will be fun to choose one. 😀
Yep, asana 🙂 So many to choose from, too!
Mary, now you have inspired me! I never thought of approaching yoga this way and I certainly could. I stretch every morning before anything else, even before coffee, which speaks to its place in my life. Thank you for the idea. 🌺
I’m heading to the land of my birth to gather with members of my youth, now all chronological adults, to celebrate the anniv of our high school reunion. I’ve been engaging in a few phone calls and online communication with a couple people. Perhaps there’s some new friendships that are taking roots. even after all these years. Those closest to me died years ago due to health inequity in their lives. and no one knew it at the time. Have a great day all–I have heard it said, the best is yet to come. Bring it on Universe! ☮️🌻💕
Have a good time catching up at your high school reunion 🙂
Oh that sound like fun Carla!
Well, besides working today, I will be putting the final touches on my raised bed garden. So I’ll have the possibility of gardening in the future.
I could also visit the local ashram and see what that’s all about. Ive read good things. I’ve been meaning to check it out for a while now. Something to help reinforce and grow my (atrophied) meditation practice. We’ll see.
Bravo
on the raised garden bed,
dear Charlie . . .♥
At my age, perhaps at any age, to nurture one new possibility for my life, I need to stay in and with the present moment.
Possibility,
dear Carol Ann,
might surprise you
when you least expect it.
When it taps on your shoulder
give it a think. ♥
Hugs, dear Sparrow
I can show up as my best human self to a driving rehabilitation assessment this morning. The aim is to return to being able to drive on the highway. When/ as I work towards this, blessed with support to do so, I will hold the gift of the support and the possibility of the return of many freedoms it offers. It has been three and a bit years. I pray for the inner and outer readiness and capacity to take this on, and be open to where it leads and the possibility it may offer in the future. It is only as I write this that I realize what a huge loss this has been.
Best for a beautiful autumn day, all …
You are courageous KC. And your attitude will support you all the way.🌸
M2,
Thank you so much!
Warmly, KC
Good luck KC!
Michele,
Thank you so much! One breath at a time …
Warmly, KC
I am excited for you, KC. Sending love. 🩵
Mary Thank you so much. With huge appreciation for your kind words.
KC sending loving energy your way!
Carol Ann, Thank you so much for your kind words. Huge appreciation!
Take action in the ways that I can. There is a time to go, and a time to stop. For me, this is a time to go.
A dear friend of mine takes up most of the conversational time in our relationship, and I just haven’t had it in me to tell her that I need more reciprocity. This has been going on for years. I finally need to tell her–I have grown dissatisfied with our relationship. To nurture a new possibility in our friendship, I can do some self-examination and be clear on what I need, and then tell her.
Drea, gaining clarity regarding what you want to say and how to say it is so wise. It may be a gift for both of you.🌺
Thank you Mary. I hope it is a gift to both of us. It’s a little scary for sure, but sometimes these things need to happen.
You are welcome, Drea.
Having been through this before, I know how difficult it is and the frustration it causes. I wish you all the best, Drea.
Thank you Sunnypatti, appreciate you understanding!
That is a difficult one. It happened to my sister and she told me about the confrontation (her friend felt like what you are describing). They are no longer friends.
Oh, darn it, I’m sorry that happened to your sister. But then again, maybe it ended up being for the best. Friendship needs to have some balance, otherwise it’s one person benefitting at the expense of the other.
true
That’s a big one, Drea. Do you think she has sensed your dissatisfaction?
Good idea to do some self examination so you are clear within yourself about what you want in this relationship.
Thanks Mary. I think she has a blind spot about this. So, on with the self-examination so I can get clarity before the conversation with her.
Oh boy,
dear Drea . . .
this is a tough one.
I wish you the best
in working it out.
I tend to be non-confrontational about these things,
and accept what the friend has to offer,
finding reciprocity in other friendships,
but I don’t think this is an ideal solution.
Godspeed. ♥
Ditto to what Sparrow said, Drea
Thanks. I’m glad to hear others have been through this. It’s hard! But I need to take the risk and see what happens, this person is precious to me.
Drea, I hear you.
One new possibility for my life is to trust the now and what is unfolding. What is currently unfolding is amazing and it’s full of love and support. I feel so blessed and grateful. I can’t believe how fortunate I am. I will do my best to focus on the universe and its enduring energy and light. I’m working on sharing this love and letting go of my minds that can’t believe or trust- letting go of the past frees up the present moment which is pregnant with possibilities. Shine like the sun ! ☀️
You go Girl! Your energy is palpable.🌺
Thanks you .
Keep on keeping on, dear Antoinette!
Your energy for this,
dear Antoinette,
is contagious. ♥
Thanks sparrow hugs 🤗
If I want to win the lottery, I have to buy a ticket.
If I want tranquility, I will practice it now.
Yes!!
Wisdom!
Great observation,
dear Yram!
It certainly makes the point. ♥
FYI All, I am changing my public name from Mary Mantei to M2 Let’s see if it works. 🌺
when I first saw M2, I was like, oh a new person, I wonder what the M2 stands for, lol.
It is the initials of my first and last names.🌺
Cute! Funny I always seem to work with Robin’s. So now it is Robin C and Robin S and at one point it was young Robin but that was her last name haha
Sounds good to me, M2.
When I was in 3rd grade in Catholic school, my teacher started calling me and the other 2 Marys in my class Mary1, Mary2, and Mary3. I’m not sure how long this lasted. 🧐 🩵
Mary, I’m feeling humorous today, and I hope my warped humor is taking lightly. I’m hearing the phrase from a spooky movie, “whatever happened to baby jane.” In it there’s a line “You are what you are Blanche!” Go for it M2!
Ha Ha! I’m still here, Carla.🌺
It works,
dear M2 . . . 🙂