To stay centered if ever possible. Allow to happen what happens and to feel what needs to be felt when it is not in my hands to do something about it and stay connected with the moment as good as possible.
Wow!! That is so powerful Sparrow. I love reading your comments. It is always so thoughtful, often moving, motivating and imparts wisdom. You certainly have a flair for writing and should look into publishing or hosting your own blog so that others will benefit from your writings. But then, you may feel comfortable doing just as you’re doing now. So, no pressure.
I can’t find my car keys
and am late for a very important appointment.
The cellar is filling up with fuel oil from a broken pipe
and my in-laws are due to arrive from Iowa this afternoon.
I wake up on a beautiful spring morning
to find my infant son is dead in his crib.
My husband is bringing co-workers home for supper
and the house is a mess because I’ve been out in the garden all day.
Sudden interferences disrupt the normalcy of my life
and I can’t breathe . . .
I feel the panic rise in my throat
like a great wad of sodden wool,
and my instincts tell me to run away–
escape the situation
and go back to the way things were
before . . .
but even if I run
(which I don’t actually DO)
the situation
is still there,
waiting for me to give my attention to it.
It can’t be changed.
It can’t go away.
It sits there like a patient dog,
like the hard reality that it is,
and I am forced to become present to it.
I am a grown up now
and there is no one to go to
to fix it for me.
I have to handle it myself.
I stand up
and I breathe . . .
b-r-e-a-t-h-e.
Survey the scene
and start over,
only this time without the panic,
acknowledge what can’t be undone,
and then I do what must be done.
Once I do that,
sanity
and the energy return . . .
I face the demon before me
and look for those keys,
call our fuel supplier,
telephone the doctor,
clear up what I can and look in the freezer
for something to provide for a dinner.
I’ve had to learn
how to manage what is in front of me . . .
breathe,
go through the motions,
move my body
and get back to myself . . .
the tears can come later,
and they usually do. ♥
Every so often I say Sparrow should publish a book!
2
sparrow
1 week ago
No,
dear Claire . . .
I do not have a website. ♥
1
sparrow
1 week ago
Thank you,
dear Mary,
thank you so much
for explaining
that I just write what is in me
in response to each Daily Question . . .
I wasn’t quite sure
what to say.
This web site
wouldn’t be the same without you either. ♥
3
Mary
1 week ago
This is Sparrow responding in her own words to today’s questions, Claire.
Sparrow is quite amazing. I have asked her before if she has thought about starting a blog or her own website.
Speaking your own truth is always moving, and always speaks to me, Sparrow.
Sparrow will always answer very modestly. But you are quite amazing, dear Sparrow, and this website would not be the same without you.
5
L
Loc Tran
1 week ago
I first came in with a SuperMario Kart dream when headed to sleep excited feeling myself that I was going to breeze right through the night. In the dream, I saw the lord and decided to hang out with him instead of racing with the characters. He had me lift weights for fun. I did a set of 15-20 pressers. I did the last 2 counts showing off my lateral moves. Lions came and breathed fire on me. I died, thanked the lord, and said that I’ll live again.
I woke up from the dream having a harder time falling asleep than anticipated rooted in excessive pride from knowing it was just a dream and not being scared of those lions breathing fire on me. It ended up taking around 3hrs of sleep.
I woke up just before 7am to go get my blood draw for my depekote levels concerning my mental health and psych meds at 8am. Returning home, I was able to eat my breakfast and get in my daily morning walk. It helped me get my ducks lined up in a row so I can tell my stories and use humor more out of inspiration rather than covering up for my vulnerabilities.
Storytelling and humor are commendable. The right roots can still turn into the wrong branches. Levity has a more connotation than distractions. The former can quickly turn into the ladder. This all points back to my reply to Michele the other day on appreciating simpler pleasures.
I had to finally face the fact that I miss Ngoc by admitting it flat out. It took manning up to do so. Luckily, it’s just 2-3 weeks left. There’s an error in my approach to the gentleman don’t tell philosophy. I searched the correct saying, and it’s “A gentleman never kiss and tell.” Every now and then, bringing up “Missing Ngoc” is considered innocent standards.
Missing Ngoc is natural, Loc. Of course you miss her when she is away. It’s part of loving her.
I miss my husband, Mark when he is away. And I always look forward to his return. ♥️
Very true, Mary. I’m slowly and steadily coming out of my ego by opening up more to my root people at gatherings, especially when they ask and embracing their affection.
Stepping away from the overwhelm to take a walk, sit outside, look at the sky–something that takes me away from whatever is overwhelming me into the natural world that is both timeless and ever-changing.
I still remember a day years ago in which I felt particularly overwhelmed. I had two young children, a more than full-time job that involved a commute driving nearly an hour each way, a husband who wasn’t particularly tuned in to my needs and how he could be a partner instead of another person needing things from me (not the husband I have now!), aging parents whose problems I was on point for as the one of six children living closest to them geographically. I lay awake in bed, unable to sleep, thinking of how my mom used to get up in the middle of the night and iron clothes when she couldn’t sleep. I asked why and she told me there was always ironing to do and she could feel she’d accomplished something without having to finish everything about it. It was also soothing because it was warm and repetitive, and the house was so quiet. When she stopped she had evidence of what she had done.
I didn’t have ironing (I don’t buy things that need to be ironed!). What I did that night that really, really helped: I got up, took my journal, and instead of making a list of all the things I hadn’t done yet I made a list of everything I *had* done that day. Everything. From making my girls’ lunches and packing them with a loving note to getting to work to all the tasks moved forward there to the things I’d done when I got home.
It was a long, long list. Through this I told myself that while there’s always more to do, I did a lot in each day.
In any given day we make a thousand, thousand decisions. Every one of those requires some element of brainpower if we haven’t built them into habits. What do I wear today? A decision. What do I eat for breakfast, lunch and dinner? More decisions. No wonder we’re overwhelmed–and this was long enough ago that I didn’t have social media tugging at my attention or streaming TV offering up many ways to postpone doing something else.
This week’s poem by James Crews in his “Weekly Pause” provides a refuge from overwhelm.
Instead of AI
Let’s use our hands to do
real things—whisking eggs
for banana bread that rises
in its pan like a miracle,
the teeth of a serrated knife
cutting each perfect slice.
Let’s write our own sentences,
stringing together words
as they come, bead by bead,
to make a necklace that fits.
Let’s pause on the forest trail
when we come upon a flock
of finches gathered like
parishioners around a patch
of open ground, worshipping
seeds exposed after a season
spent smothered by ice.
Let’s watch when they fly up,
flapping all at once, with a
sudden flutter of wonder
no machine will ever know.
Barb, it’s getting warmer in Minnesota now. Nice to be able to go on a walk without having to put on long pants and a jacket. As far as AI goes, I’m guilty of it too. For example, I have a lot of NBA conspiracy theories that are easier to cover with them. That can turn addicting. Ultimately, nothing replaces human interactions. With real NBA fans, it’s easier to get straight to the point with conspiracy theories or what if simulations, because they know the scoop and aren’t circling us with 200 questions to control our minds.
I feel overwhelmed when my routines are thrown off or my days do not have much structure. The best way to relieve that is to remind myself to be patient with my mind, reset and refocus for the day, and simply venting about it (as it is a release for me).
Mindfulness which always shows me that I am dwelling on the past or the future. Like YRAM said–“reaching out to others.” I’ve done that often and it helps to check on someone else and listen to their thoughts and feelings. And always, practicing gratefulness nurtures a healthy perspective in any situation. As Eckhart Tolle says, “Don’t turn a situation into a problem!”
Reaching out to others in some sort form.
My friend had this idea: she wrote on slips of paper what needed to be done. Then at random picked one and did it. She said the sense of accomplishment helped to calm the feeling of being overwhelmed.
I like this as a way of getting going, then once you’re going it’s easier to continue.
I do a form of this heading into some weekends. I make a list of “possibilities”–things I might do. The list always includes pleasant things like read, go for a bike ride, take a nap or a bath, as well as the endless list of household and garden tasks. It’s always longer than I can possibly accomplish and that’s fine. By design these are possibilities, not assignments. Just having the list motivates me to be able to do something on it and fill in the little circle bubble next to the task. I don’t sort the list, I just keep writing as things occur to me. Seeing the items written down also lets me recognize that some are short-term, some really don’t need to be done right now.
Since it’s Friday I think I’ll do this in today’s journal. Thanks for inspiring this.
Yes, feeling overwhelmed can really take it out of me and leave me feeling so tired and drained.
I don’t feel overwhelmed as often as I used to, but it can still hit me pretty hard.
I think, coming back to the present moment and reminding myself that in this moment, I am safe and I have what I need, really helps.
Also, doing something, anything, seems to be helpful. Some kind of action. In fact, getting outside and moving my body, seems to be the best antidote.
Sleep helps. Getting outdoors and walking helps. Reflecting on all that I am grateful for helps. Anything that helps me get out of small thinking and into a more expansive way of viewing life helps me to shift my mind from overwhelm to being in awe. Thank you for this question. 🩷🩷🩷
I was thinking in a small way this morning. Being here has opened me up to feeling awe. I am grateful. 🩷
Mary, this reminds me of my evolution over my handling over Ngoc’s absence. Being able to be upfront and honest feels 10,000 times lighter than playing politics and pulling strings for personal desires, especially for autonomy.
I am participating in the Gratefulness 100 Day Challenge. Today’s challenge is about using play and humor when “standing up” for something. I also think that works when feeling overwhelmed. Just keep a list of playful activities, connections or ideas at hand and pull one out for those times of feeling overwhelmed. Or remember not to take life too seriously by finding something silly or ridiculous about the situation, or a funny memory. Breathing also helps, and I’m also learning through a podcast I listen to at night that thoughts are thoughts, but they are just thoughts. At midnight or 3 am the only power they hold is keeping me awake. I have slept much better with that in mind. Thinking of us all as we ride into this weekend in all our own situations. May we find joy.
I appreciate how many have suggested focus on breathing, I forget to do that. I do know how deep breathing from my diaphragm re-centers me. Praying to the Divine to be blanketed with supportive, nurturing Love and guidance works too, What always helps is a call to a supportive friend. I’m in a challenging emotional landscape these days of needing to know I’m not alone. Gentle restful weekend thoughts to all. 🫶🏽☮️
I hope you feel cared for and supported here at this gratefulness site Carla. I care about you and know that others here also care about you and want the very best for you. Sending my love and support. Mary ♥️💕☀️✨
Give yourself the gift of free bi-monthly inspiration including uplifting articles, diverse stories, supportive practices, videos, and more, delivered with heart to your inbox.
To stay centered if ever possible. Allow to happen what happens and to feel what needs to be felt when it is not in my hands to do something about it and stay connected with the moment as good as possible.
Wow!! That is so powerful Sparrow. I love reading your comments. It is always so thoughtful, often moving, motivating and imparts wisdom. You certainly have a flair for writing and should look into publishing or hosting your own blog so that others will benefit from your writings. But then, you may feel comfortable doing just as you’re doing now. So, no pressure.
I can’t find my car keys
and am late for a very important appointment.
The cellar is filling up with fuel oil from a broken pipe
and my in-laws are due to arrive from Iowa this afternoon.
I wake up on a beautiful spring morning
to find my infant son is dead in his crib.
My husband is bringing co-workers home for supper
and the house is a mess because I’ve been out in the garden all day.
Sudden interferences disrupt the normalcy of my life
and I can’t breathe . . .
I feel the panic rise in my throat
like a great wad of sodden wool,
and my instincts tell me to run away–
escape the situation
and go back to the way things were
before . . .
but even if I run
(which I don’t actually DO)
the situation
is still there,
waiting for me to give my attention to it.
It can’t be changed.
It can’t go away.
It sits there like a patient dog,
like the hard reality that it is,
and I am forced to become present to it.
I am a grown up now
and there is no one to go to
to fix it for me.
I have to handle it myself.
I stand up
and I breathe . . .
b-r-e-a-t-h-e.
Survey the scene
and start over,
only this time without the panic,
acknowledge what can’t be undone,
and then I do what must be done.
Once I do that,
sanity
and the energy return . . .
I face the demon before me
and look for those keys,
call our fuel supplier,
telephone the doctor,
clear up what I can and look in the freezer
for something to provide for a dinner.
I’ve had to learn
how to manage what is in front of me . . .
breathe,
go through the motions,
move my body
and get back to myself . . .
the tears can come later,
and they usually do. ♥
❤️☀️
Poem author?
What poem,
dear Claire? ♥
Your reflection you posted here. You wrote this? Do you have a website 🧡🧡
Every so often I say Sparrow should publish a book!
No,
dear Claire . . .
I do not have a website. ♥
Thank you,
dear Mary,
thank you so much
for explaining
that I just write what is in me
in response to each Daily Question . . .
I wasn’t quite sure
what to say.
This web site
wouldn’t be the same without you either. ♥
This is Sparrow responding in her own words to today’s questions, Claire.
Sparrow is quite amazing. I have asked her before if she has thought about starting a blog or her own website.
Speaking your own truth is always moving, and always speaks to me, Sparrow.
Sparrow will always answer very modestly. But you are quite amazing, dear Sparrow, and this website would not be the same without you.
I first came in with a SuperMario Kart dream when headed to sleep excited feeling myself that I was going to breeze right through the night. In the dream, I saw the lord and decided to hang out with him instead of racing with the characters. He had me lift weights for fun. I did a set of 15-20 pressers. I did the last 2 counts showing off my lateral moves. Lions came and breathed fire on me. I died, thanked the lord, and said that I’ll live again.
I woke up from the dream having a harder time falling asleep than anticipated rooted in excessive pride from knowing it was just a dream and not being scared of those lions breathing fire on me. It ended up taking around 3hrs of sleep.
I woke up just before 7am to go get my blood draw for my depekote levels concerning my mental health and psych meds at 8am. Returning home, I was able to eat my breakfast and get in my daily morning walk. It helped me get my ducks lined up in a row so I can tell my stories and use humor more out of inspiration rather than covering up for my vulnerabilities.
Storytelling and humor are commendable. The right roots can still turn into the wrong branches. Levity has a more connotation than distractions. The former can quickly turn into the ladder. This all points back to my reply to Michele the other day on appreciating simpler pleasures.
I had to finally face the fact that I miss Ngoc by admitting it flat out. It took manning up to do so. Luckily, it’s just 2-3 weeks left. There’s an error in my approach to the gentleman don’t tell philosophy. I searched the correct saying, and it’s “A gentleman never kiss and tell.” Every now and then, bringing up “Missing Ngoc” is considered innocent standards.
Missing Ngoc is natural, Loc. Of course you miss her when she is away. It’s part of loving her.
I miss my husband, Mark when he is away. And I always look forward to his return. ♥️
Very true, Mary. I’m slowly and steadily coming out of my ego by opening up more to my root people at gatherings, especially when they ask and embracing their affection.
♥
Journaling
Sleep
Exercise
Selfcare
Stepping away from the overwhelm to take a walk, sit outside, look at the sky–something that takes me away from whatever is overwhelming me into the natural world that is both timeless and ever-changing.
I still remember a day years ago in which I felt particularly overwhelmed. I had two young children, a more than full-time job that involved a commute driving nearly an hour each way, a husband who wasn’t particularly tuned in to my needs and how he could be a partner instead of another person needing things from me (not the husband I have now!), aging parents whose problems I was on point for as the one of six children living closest to them geographically. I lay awake in bed, unable to sleep, thinking of how my mom used to get up in the middle of the night and iron clothes when she couldn’t sleep. I asked why and she told me there was always ironing to do and she could feel she’d accomplished something without having to finish everything about it. It was also soothing because it was warm and repetitive, and the house was so quiet. When she stopped she had evidence of what she had done.
I didn’t have ironing (I don’t buy things that need to be ironed!). What I did that night that really, really helped: I got up, took my journal, and instead of making a list of all the things I hadn’t done yet I made a list of everything I *had* done that day. Everything. From making my girls’ lunches and packing them with a loving note to getting to work to all the tasks moved forward there to the things I’d done when I got home.
It was a long, long list. Through this I told myself that while there’s always more to do, I did a lot in each day.
In any given day we make a thousand, thousand decisions. Every one of those requires some element of brainpower if we haven’t built them into habits. What do I wear today? A decision. What do I eat for breakfast, lunch and dinner? More decisions. No wonder we’re overwhelmed–and this was long enough ago that I didn’t have social media tugging at my attention or streaming TV offering up many ways to postpone doing something else.
This week’s poem by James Crews in his “Weekly Pause” provides a refuge from overwhelm.
Instead of AI
Let’s use our hands to do
real things—whisking eggs
for banana bread that rises
in its pan like a miracle,
the teeth of a serrated knife
cutting each perfect slice.
Let’s write our own sentences,
stringing together words
as they come, bead by bead,
to make a necklace that fits.
Let’s pause on the forest trail
when we come upon a flock
of finches gathered like
parishioners around a patch
of open ground, worshipping
seeds exposed after a season
spent smothered by ice.
Let’s watch when they fly up,
flapping all at once, with a
sudden flutter of wonder
no machine will ever know.
https://mailchi.mp/8eb13006f548/weekly-pause-instead-of-ai?e=4660b7819e
I sent this to my son who uses AI all the time.
Thank you for your reflections from your life and for the wonderful poem, Barb.
Both touched my heart.
I just love what your mother used to do,
dear Barb,
and do similar things
when I can’t sleep.
ps. Ironing
is one of my favorite tasks.
And I love, love, love
the poem by James Crews.
It’s a beautiful ode
to life before AI
and I think I will sit with it here
for awhile.
Namaste . . . ♥
Barb, it’s getting warmer in Minnesota now. Nice to be able to go on a walk without having to put on long pants and a jacket. As far as AI goes, I’m guilty of it too. For example, I have a lot of NBA conspiracy theories that are easier to cover with them. That can turn addicting. Ultimately, nothing replaces human interactions. With real NBA fans, it’s easier to get straight to the point with conspiracy theories or what if simulations, because they know the scoop and aren’t circling us with 200 questions to control our minds.
I feel overwhelmed when my routines are thrown off or my days do not have much structure. The best way to relieve that is to remind myself to be patient with my mind, reset and refocus for the day, and simply venting about it (as it is a release for me).
Mindfulness which always shows me that I am dwelling on the past or the future. Like YRAM said–“reaching out to others.” I’ve done that often and it helps to check on someone else and listen to their thoughts and feelings. And always, practicing gratefulness nurtures a healthy perspective in any situation. As Eckhart Tolle says, “Don’t turn a situation into a problem!”
Reaching out to others in some sort form.
My friend had this idea: she wrote on slips of paper what needed to be done. Then at random picked one and did it. She said the sense of accomplishment helped to calm the feeling of being overwhelmed.
I like this as a way of getting going, then once you’re going it’s easier to continue.
I do a form of this heading into some weekends. I make a list of “possibilities”–things I might do. The list always includes pleasant things like read, go for a bike ride, take a nap or a bath, as well as the endless list of household and garden tasks. It’s always longer than I can possibly accomplish and that’s fine. By design these are possibilities, not assignments. Just having the list motivates me to be able to do something on it and fill in the little circle bubble next to the task. I don’t sort the list, I just keep writing as things occur to me. Seeing the items written down also lets me recognize that some are short-term, some really don’t need to be done right now.
Since it’s Friday I think I’ll do this in today’s journal. Thanks for inspiring this.
Good advice! Thanks
I love this,
dear Yram,
and think that this practice
could be something that helps me as well.
Thank you. ♥
Yes, feeling overwhelmed can really take it out of me and leave me feeling so tired and drained.
I don’t feel overwhelmed as often as I used to, but it can still hit me pretty hard.
I think, coming back to the present moment and reminding myself that in this moment, I am safe and I have what I need, really helps.
Also, doing something, anything, seems to be helpful. Some kind of action. In fact, getting outside and moving my body, seems to be the best antidote.
Sleep helps. Getting outdoors and walking helps. Reflecting on all that I am grateful for helps. Anything that helps me get out of small thinking and into a more expansive way of viewing life helps me to shift my mind from overwhelm to being in awe. Thank you for this question. 🩷🩷🩷
I was thinking in a small way this morning. Being here has opened me up to feeling awe. I am grateful. 🩷
Mary, this reminds me of my evolution over my handling over Ngoc’s absence. Being able to be upfront and honest feels 10,000 times lighter than playing politics and pulling strings for personal desires, especially for autonomy.
A nap, a day off, a hike or run outside, music/dance/singing.
Drea, I’ll certainly be taking a nap today.
All of these things sound wonderful, Drea! 🌻
I am participating in the Gratefulness 100 Day Challenge. Today’s challenge is about using play and humor when “standing up” for something. I also think that works when feeling overwhelmed. Just keep a list of playful activities, connections or ideas at hand and pull one out for those times of feeling overwhelmed. Or remember not to take life too seriously by finding something silly or ridiculous about the situation, or a funny memory. Breathing also helps, and I’m also learning through a podcast I listen to at night that thoughts are thoughts, but they are just thoughts. At midnight or 3 am the only power they hold is keeping me awake. I have slept much better with that in mind. Thinking of us all as we ride into this weekend in all our own situations. May we find joy.
Thank you Katrina! May you find joy as well! 😊
I appreciate how many have suggested focus on breathing, I forget to do that. I do know how deep breathing from my diaphragm re-centers me. Praying to the Divine to be blanketed with supportive, nurturing Love and guidance works too, What always helps is a call to a supportive friend. I’m in a challenging emotional landscape these days of needing to know I’m not alone. Gentle restful weekend thoughts to all. 🫶🏽☮️
Loving kindness to you and a big virtual hug 🤗💗
Loving kindness to you, dear Carla.
Carla, Big Hug coming your way.
Stop in here,
dear Carla,
when you are feeling alone . . .
you are not.
We are all in this together. ♥
We are alone together on life’s journey.
True, Yram. We’re all walking each other home.
I hope you feel cared for and supported here at this gratefulness site Carla. I care about you and know that others here also care about you and want the very best for you. Sending my love and support. Mary ♥️💕☀️✨
Breath work. Conscious rest. Taking a walk.
Conscious rest. Good point, SunnyPatti. ✨☀️