I feel Grateful knowing some of my ancestry. Several family members did research, I love learning about my Celtic background.
My Dad also enjoys talking about his childhood. I am grateful my parents did move from Utica NY to New England also.
Enormous gratitude for all four of my parents (I’m adopted so I have extra). To my biological mother for letting me go (I got to know her when I became an adult and it was a good thing we didn’t have to deal with each other – just saying); my biological father for refusing to get trapped in marriage before he was ready (see comments on my bio mom); most of all, my “real” parents, the folks who raised me, who chose me, who gave up everything so they could love me. Most of all, I am grateful for them.
Dawn– That is really beautiful that you have come to that place of peace of being able to have gratitude to your biological mother for letting you go. So inspiring to hear about your “real” parents, as well!
Pride, sadness, hope, fear. They’re all there. Pride in who they made me become. Sadness because they are no longer with me. Hope to pass on what they’ve instilled in me. And fear that I never will. But overall, happiness that there was a group of people out there to give me the strength to be me and strive forward.
Awe at the ancient ones and their deep knowledge of the land. Humble gratitude for the ones who took risks, some with success, others at the expense of their lives. Disappointment at the ones who followed status and materialism and dismissed dignity and basic humanity. Frustration at the ones who blindly follow an abusive hierarchy. Mercy for the ones who died young as the result of war and poverty. Humble awe at how many have made my life possible, including those whose names I will never know, and those who are part of the more-than-human world.
When I’m using a cell phone to call my family in Vietnam, I’m thankful to the “father of handheld phone,” Martin Cooper. I can’t imagine living far away from my family and it is impossible to contact them.
I feel connected to my ancestors and I claim their strength. I know they want me to succeed. Richard Rohr’s meditation today speaks of kin-dom not kingdoms. It reminds me of what one of my mentors always use to say: “There is nothing more real than a relationship.” And, I am thankful that I feel the relationship of my DNA ancestors and am constantly working on embracing the fact that everyone from every corner of the world who came before me or with me is my kin.
Here’s the link to Rohr’s Daily Meditation: https://cac.org/daily-meditations/in-the-beginning/
I’ve been using Kin-dom for years now. It’s more inclusive and communal of — “we’re” related. Some may be uncomfortable when I use it publicly in a group setting saying the Lord’s Prayer. And I’m ok with that. Words matter how we envision the Divine. 😉
Elizabeth, I identify with every feeling you listed. The list is also a reminder that feelings are not the same thing as thoughts! For me humbled and fragile equate to the willingness to be vulnerable. Open heart and Open mind.
I miss my parents as they were in their younger years. My mom spent many years with vascular dementia so the woman she had been packed up and left a bit at a time. My dad stayed himself but grew quieter and quieter and he was quiet to begin with.
I smile when I picture them and my maternal grandmother, who taught me to knit, tat, and bowl. They gave me a solid foundation and a good start in life. I recognize my good fortune and am so grateful.
I wonder about the lives of the generations before. People made decisions to leave the countries they were from and come to North America. They didn’t have a lot of money and they lived hard lives.
Some of the people who made my life possible are those who stood up for what they believed in and provided examples of courage, persistence, and hope. I’m especially grateful for them as inspiration and model.
Barb, I too derive courage from those who stood up for what they believed in. I think of them when I feel like hiding. They were so much braver than me … but then I think, I come from them, so I can do it too.
Well, this is something I do sometimes when I meditate. It’s a people centered gratitude meditation, and I imagine a tree, and I’m sitting at the base, the branches above me represent all of the people who have helped me in my life that are still living. And then I imagine the roots as all the people and ancestors that have helped me but have passed.
I think of each of them and some in groups and thank them. It’s a long list.
This helps take me out of my thoughts of isolation and self pity and fills me with a sense of connection.
I feel a mixture of appreciation but also sadness and anger, mainly stemming from the injustices and the unfairness of what my family has went through. Also anger and sadness towards myself because I feel like I have disappointed them by not working hard enough or have anything to show.
Jenifer, thank you for your honest and thoughtful post. I feel like if you’re here, if you can name the complicated feelings, if you have the strength to share with vulnerability, that’s already evidence of having done a lot of work.
Jenifer, May you forsake the blame and shame game. It is not easy to do. It took me many years. Always remember, you are enough and have always been enough.
Paw Mu’s advice of not going alone is a game changer. Staying closer to the people she advised me to from my: family, culture, and elders brings a sense of peace and satisfaction.
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The huge sacrifices that were made by especially my mother….she has been gone for many years but the love and respect I have for her will never end.
I feel Grateful knowing some of my ancestry. Several family members did research, I love learning about my Celtic background.
My Dad also enjoys talking about his childhood. I am grateful my parents did move from Utica NY to New England also.
Enormous gratitude for all four of my parents (I’m adopted so I have extra). To my biological mother for letting me go (I got to know her when I became an adult and it was a good thing we didn’t have to deal with each other – just saying); my biological father for refusing to get trapped in marriage before he was ready (see comments on my bio mom); most of all, my “real” parents, the folks who raised me, who chose me, who gave up everything so they could love me. Most of all, I am grateful for them.
Dawn– That is really beautiful that you have come to that place of peace of being able to have gratitude to your biological mother for letting you go. So inspiring to hear about your “real” parents, as well!
Pride, sadness, hope, fear. They’re all there. Pride in who they made me become. Sadness because they are no longer with me. Hope to pass on what they’ve instilled in me. And fear that I never will. But overall, happiness that there was a group of people out there to give me the strength to be me and strive forward.
I missed your name popping up. Good to see it this a.m.
Awe at the ancient ones and their deep knowledge of the land. Humble gratitude for the ones who took risks, some with success, others at the expense of their lives. Disappointment at the ones who followed status and materialism and dismissed dignity and basic humanity. Frustration at the ones who blindly follow an abusive hierarchy. Mercy for the ones who died young as the result of war and poverty. Humble awe at how many have made my life possible, including those whose names I will never know, and those who are part of the more-than-human world.
When I’m using a cell phone to call my family in Vietnam, I’m thankful to the “father of handheld phone,” Martin Cooper. I can’t imagine living far away from my family and it is impossible to contact them.
My Ngoc, it wasn’t too long ago when we were writing letters and putting in quarters at those phone booths to contact loved ones.
Ngoc, thank you for your perspective, thanking those who have made things possible really is humbling. There are so many of them.
I feel connected to my ancestors and I claim their strength. I know they want me to succeed. Richard Rohr’s meditation today speaks of kin-dom not kingdoms. It reminds me of what one of my mentors always use to say: “There is nothing more real than a relationship.” And, I am thankful that I feel the relationship of my DNA ancestors and am constantly working on embracing the fact that everyone from every corner of the world who came before me or with me is my kin.
Here’s the link to Rohr’s Daily Meditation: https://cac.org/daily-meditations/in-the-beginning/
Thank you for spreading the ideas of Richard Rohr. I believe he is a modern prophet.
Kin-dom not kingdom … I love this, Carol.
I’ve been using Kin-dom for years now. It’s more inclusive and communal of — “we’re” related. Some may be uncomfortable when I use it publicly in a group setting saying the Lord’s Prayer. And I’m ok with that. Words matter how we envision the Divine. 😉
I decided to cheat and look at a list of feelings for this one 🙂
(https://www.hoffmaninstitute.org/wp-content/uploads/Practices-FeelingsSensations.pdf )
Present, amazed, intrigued, interconnected, fragile, humbled
Elizabeth, I identify with every feeling you listed. The list is also a reminder that feelings are not the same thing as thoughts! For me humbled and fragile equate to the willingness to be vulnerable. Open heart and Open mind.
I have feelings of regret, that I didn’t ask more questions as to how they handled certain situations.
I have feelings of gratefulness as I can see a bit of me in each one of my relatives.
I have feelings of hope that I can carry on and contribute my small portion to a better me and the world.
I miss my parents as they were in their younger years. My mom spent many years with vascular dementia so the woman she had been packed up and left a bit at a time. My dad stayed himself but grew quieter and quieter and he was quiet to begin with.
I smile when I picture them and my maternal grandmother, who taught me to knit, tat, and bowl. They gave me a solid foundation and a good start in life. I recognize my good fortune and am so grateful.
I wonder about the lives of the generations before. People made decisions to leave the countries they were from and come to North America. They didn’t have a lot of money and they lived hard lives.
Some of the people who made my life possible are those who stood up for what they believed in and provided examples of courage, persistence, and hope. I’m especially grateful for them as inspiration and model.
Barb, I too derive courage from those who stood up for what they believed in. I think of them when I feel like hiding. They were so much braver than me … but then I think, I come from them, so I can do it too.
Well, this is something I do sometimes when I meditate. It’s a people centered gratitude meditation, and I imagine a tree, and I’m sitting at the base, the branches above me represent all of the people who have helped me in my life that are still living. And then I imagine the roots as all the people and ancestors that have helped me but have passed.
I think of each of them and some in groups and thank them. It’s a long list.
This helps take me out of my thoughts of isolation and self pity and fills me with a sense of connection.
Beautifully said, Charlie.
I feel a mixture of appreciation but also sadness and anger, mainly stemming from the injustices and the unfairness of what my family has went through. Also anger and sadness towards myself because I feel like I have disappointed them by not working hard enough or have anything to show.
Jenifer, thank you for your honest and thoughtful post. I feel like if you’re here, if you can name the complicated feelings, if you have the strength to share with vulnerability, that’s already evidence of having done a lot of work.
Jenifer, May you forsake the blame and shame game. It is not easy to do. It took me many years. Always remember, you are enough and have always been enough.
I am deeply grateful & thankful.
Wish I could have spent time with them, to hear their stories.
I am grateful for them.
And I wish I could have known them.
Paw Mu’s advice of not going alone is a game changer. Staying closer to the people she advised me to from my: family, culture, and elders brings a sense of peace and satisfaction.