I find myself resisting this question, which probably means it’s one I need to spend time with. My first inclination is to reply that my life is already quite simple, and if anything, I long for more, not less. After a while, I acknowledge that I am lonely and longing for more connection. And perhaps I’ve become disconnected from myself. And maybe this time all alone, in this empty house, with nothing to do, is not a problem to be solved, but rather an opportunity. And if I can just sit still and stop trying to fill the void, I might recognize the gift that this “boredom and emptiness” offers. For if I can dwell in the moment, without projecting my opinions onto it, there is nothing missing. And in fact, I am held and loved by the One who has always held and loved me, through it all. And so I arrive at a different answer, that quieting my mind, letting go of expectations, and accepting what is, is and always has been, the key to what I seek.
I don´t know. It is much on my plate these days, all of which I feel is required to serve to for the moment being, and so I do. I am fully present to the obligations at hand, and to the people related with. Today, it was possible to clear space on my desk, the physical and the virtual, so this allows space to breathe again more deeply, and offers some relaxation for the weekend, and joy. May you all have a lovely weekend!
I think I have simplified my life over the years. Being retired helped me do that! Now there is plenty of time to get things done, instead of creating endless lists of things that made me very anxious if I didn’t accomplish them.
I have a number of interests and can be obsessive. Sometimes I find myself going down rabbit holes or feeling like I need tomes of data before making a decision. All of this feels like it can be simplified and more intentional. A willingness to trust my intuition or to be more deliberate in the way I seek information would foster more presence and give me more freedom to be present.
Folks razz me when I admit there’s an online program that is my “news source” of minutia as I don’t own a tv. (I made that choice years ago-very freeing). Unfortunately I can slide through many of the scenarios online, commenting supportively, etc. I need to decrease the amount of time the phone’s in my hand watching it.
I’ve been deliberately simplifying my belongings for some time now and can’t think of something material that interferes with being present. Online is another story! I’ve started unsubscribing from email lists that send me things I never read. I used to think I should stay subscribed so they can count me as a supporter, but that creates in-box clutter I have to sweep out. If I’m not giving them real attention I shouldn’t pretend I’m giving them any at all. I’ll set a few more rules for automatic deletion of emails I don’t need or read. Thanks to this question I’m also giving myself permission to delete everything in my “newsletter email” in-box, declare email bankruptcy, and start over. I’ve been thinking about doing it and this is the push I needed. I’ll never miss what’s there that I haven’t read yet because there’s always more.
My life is pretty simple and I attempt
to be present in all the areas of my
life. The things that got in the way
(the “news”, TV, smoking weed, etc) I
have removed from my life and I feel
much more present without those things.
My attempt to be present is a practice
of catching myself drifting into the
past or future, and coming back to this
moment. I do scroll through Facebook
when I’m bored and want to check out.
This is certainly unnecessary and has
Become a habit. Thank you for this
question, as it has allowed me to take an
inventory of sorts and reflect. 🙏
Oh, the scrolling! I’m on FB mostly for my local Buy Nothing group and a couple of other communities, and it’s so easy to slip sideways into seeing what’s up from people I’ve known over the years. I had a lot of FB friends because I’ve been an early adopter of social media (worked in communications, did a lot of testing of things to see if we should use them for my employer). A while back I started an occasional practice of looking at whose birthdays I was being told about on a given day if I’m on FB. If they aren’t someone I feel moved to directly wish “happy birthday” then I delete them as a friend. They’ll never know and I’ve pruned my feed a bit. I also snooze people quite freely.
I need to stop over thinking and just act. Make a decision and stick with it…not side lines, no ifs, ands or buts…JUST DO IT!! I have one decision in mind- one that I have tried over and over again and failed at. But it is simple…just do it….and don’t look back. A great day to start…September 1!! Decision made! Thank you one and all!! Blessings.
Throw my iPhone away! Perhaps not literally, but some form of that. Nine months ago I graduated to an insulin pump system which incorporates my phone as a data collection tool, which also transmits real time data which informs me of my glucose levels and assists me to make decisions so easily. So how can I not love that phone! Like so many things in life, a blessing and a burden. In many ways, it simplifies my life. So my phone is almost always with me. This question has prompted me to consider how I might reduce its presence in other ways so my presence can be enhanced.
My monkey mind and my tendency to compulsive doubting. I can make a solid decision, take a definite direction and still go through a stretch of “Should I or Shouldn’t I” after a decision is made! I call it “The Shackles of Should.” I have learned that it is a process I’m prone to and most of the time, I can just observe it until it passes! If I fight it, it tends to stick around.
I wish I could simplify my worklife, but I’m not sure how to. There’s so much involved with owning a restaurant, and not being able to hire puts a lot of stress on us. I will at least be sure to take breaks and focus on my breath throughout the day. If I can keep my breath calm, I know I can stay grounded and deal with each moment properly.
Sunnypatti, I second Charlie T. I had a geriatrics practice for 10 years, and in the midst of the constant stress of house calls, staffing, being on call, working with dementia patients and families, caregivers, etc, I knew I was doing such holy work. That kept me going. You are too. Nothing more basic and loving than nourishing people.
Sunnypatti, I feel ya. I had my own business
(a bike shop) for 23yrs. and I know all too
well the stresses that come with it. I hope
you are able to savor the act of feeding
people and what you are doing is in fact,
a creative endeavor. I’m root’n for ya!
My ongoing “project” is that my kitchen table is also my office. I live in a fairly small condo, so I seem to always be working on my surfaces – the kitchen table especially, which is more my desk than anything else. I try to contain and sort regularly. The books I am reading/consulting at this point are in a small size holder, I use colored baskets for glasses, rotating holders for lotions and such, a small stand for daily calendar, my planner right in the middle, and my computer at the “head of the table” etc. This helps me to be present (believe it or not) so that when I am reading, I am reading – books or keyboard, etc. This is about as simplified as I get (so far). Always a work in progress.
Shut off my phone! Judging by how often my wife and daughters get after me for NOT picking up their calls and texts the moment they call, I’m far less connected to my cell phone than most people. But still, there are days when I wish that I had left the phone at home for a host of reasons.
I too have been accused of not
being available by phone and have
bristled at being instantly and
constantly connected.
Don’t get me wrong, I am very
attached to my phone and all that
it can do.
I spent a week in a psych ward a
few years ago, and since we weren’t
allowed to have our phones,
we just sat around talking to each
other all day. I met such amazing
people. Best therapy ever!
My theory is I have made it 66 years without one so I believe I can make it for the remainder of my time without one. Cheryl has another theory though. “You just do not want anyone to know where you are or be bothered.” Hmmmmm, may be a bit of truth there!
“I am an old man and have known a great many troubles. most of which never came to pass.” Attributed to Samuel Clemens.
No future tripping. Catastrophizing. Any other adjective to describe being monkey minded. That snake eating its tail worry that brings about the overwhelmed emotion that leads to anxiety for me. This will keep me from being present and has led me back to the dark place of self-medication and active addiction with booze many times in the past. I need to remember to just breathe, take a step back in my mind and breathe in the joy and wonder of just how truly fortunate I have been and be one with the present. It is all I have at each and every moment that I am gifted with another.
Love that quotation. That’s what my mom referred to as “borrowing trouble”. Every once in a while I have to remind myself that I’m creating suffering entirely in my own mind if I’m imagining what might happen, and the stress is just as real as if that event were actually occurring. No need to do that to myself.
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I find myself resisting this question, which probably means it’s one I need to spend time with. My first inclination is to reply that my life is already quite simple, and if anything, I long for more, not less. After a while, I acknowledge that I am lonely and longing for more connection. And perhaps I’ve become disconnected from myself. And maybe this time all alone, in this empty house, with nothing to do, is not a problem to be solved, but rather an opportunity. And if I can just sit still and stop trying to fill the void, I might recognize the gift that this “boredom and emptiness” offers. For if I can dwell in the moment, without projecting my opinions onto it, there is nothing missing. And in fact, I am held and loved by the One who has always held and loved me, through it all. And so I arrive at a different answer, that quieting my mind, letting go of expectations, and accepting what is, is and always has been, the key to what I seek.
I don´t know. It is much on my plate these days, all of which I feel is required to serve to for the moment being, and so I do. I am fully present to the obligations at hand, and to the people related with. Today, it was possible to clear space on my desk, the physical and the virtual, so this allows space to breathe again more deeply, and offers some relaxation for the weekend, and joy. May you all have a lovely weekend!
I think I have simplified my life over the years. Being retired helped me do that! Now there is plenty of time to get things done, instead of creating endless lists of things that made me very anxious if I didn’t accomplish them.
I have a number of interests and can be obsessive. Sometimes I find myself going down rabbit holes or feeling like I need tomes of data before making a decision. All of this feels like it can be simplified and more intentional. A willingness to trust my intuition or to be more deliberate in the way I seek information would foster more presence and give me more freedom to be present.
Folks razz me when I admit there’s an online program that is my “news source” of minutia as I don’t own a tv. (I made that choice years ago-very freeing). Unfortunately I can slide through many of the scenarios online, commenting supportively, etc. I need to decrease the amount of time the phone’s in my hand watching it.
I’ve been deliberately simplifying my belongings for some time now and can’t think of something material that interferes with being present. Online is another story! I’ve started unsubscribing from email lists that send me things I never read. I used to think I should stay subscribed so they can count me as a supporter, but that creates in-box clutter I have to sweep out. If I’m not giving them real attention I shouldn’t pretend I’m giving them any at all. I’ll set a few more rules for automatic deletion of emails I don’t need or read. Thanks to this question I’m also giving myself permission to delete everything in my “newsletter email” in-box, declare email bankruptcy, and start over. I’ve been thinking about doing it and this is the push I needed. I’ll never miss what’s there that I haven’t read yet because there’s always more.
My life is pretty simple and I attempt
to be present in all the areas of my
life. The things that got in the way
(the “news”, TV, smoking weed, etc) I
have removed from my life and I feel
much more present without those things.
My attempt to be present is a practice
of catching myself drifting into the
past or future, and coming back to this
moment. I do scroll through Facebook
when I’m bored and want to check out.
This is certainly unnecessary and has
Become a habit. Thank you for this
question, as it has allowed me to take an
inventory of sorts and reflect. 🙏
Oh, the scrolling! I’m on FB mostly for my local Buy Nothing group and a couple of other communities, and it’s so easy to slip sideways into seeing what’s up from people I’ve known over the years. I had a lot of FB friends because I’ve been an early adopter of social media (worked in communications, did a lot of testing of things to see if we should use them for my employer). A while back I started an occasional practice of looking at whose birthdays I was being told about on a given day if I’m on FB. If they aren’t someone I feel moved to directly wish “happy birthday” then I delete them as a friend. They’ll never know and I’ve pruned my feed a bit. I also snooze people quite freely.
I tend to make relationships very complicated. I want to strive to enjoy the interaction.
I need to stop over thinking and just act. Make a decision and stick with it…not side lines, no ifs, ands or buts…JUST DO IT!! I have one decision in mind- one that I have tried over and over again and failed at. But it is simple…just do it….and don’t look back. A great day to start…September 1!! Decision made! Thank you one and all!! Blessings.
Throw my iPhone away! Perhaps not literally, but some form of that. Nine months ago I graduated to an insulin pump system which incorporates my phone as a data collection tool, which also transmits real time data which informs me of my glucose levels and assists me to make decisions so easily. So how can I not love that phone! Like so many things in life, a blessing and a burden. In many ways, it simplifies my life. So my phone is almost always with me. This question has prompted me to consider how I might reduce its presence in other ways so my presence can be enhanced.
So true. For me as well.
My monkey mind and my tendency to compulsive doubting. I can make a solid decision, take a definite direction and still go through a stretch of “Should I or Shouldn’t I” after a decision is made! I call it “The Shackles of Should.” I have learned that it is a process I’m prone to and most of the time, I can just observe it until it passes! If I fight it, it tends to stick around.
I wish I could simplify my worklife, but I’m not sure how to. There’s so much involved with owning a restaurant, and not being able to hire puts a lot of stress on us. I will at least be sure to take breaks and focus on my breath throughout the day. If I can keep my breath calm, I know I can stay grounded and deal with each moment properly.
Sunnypatti, I second Charlie T. I had a geriatrics practice for 10 years, and in the midst of the constant stress of house calls, staffing, being on call, working with dementia patients and families, caregivers, etc, I knew I was doing such holy work. That kept me going. You are too. Nothing more basic and loving than nourishing people.
Sunnypatti, I feel ya. I had my own business
(a bike shop) for 23yrs. and I know all too
well the stresses that come with it. I hope
you are able to savor the act of feeding
people and what you are doing is in fact,
a creative endeavor. I’m root’n for ya!
My ongoing “project” is that my kitchen table is also my office. I live in a fairly small condo, so I seem to always be working on my surfaces – the kitchen table especially, which is more my desk than anything else. I try to contain and sort regularly. The books I am reading/consulting at this point are in a small size holder, I use colored baskets for glasses, rotating holders for lotions and such, a small stand for daily calendar, my planner right in the middle, and my computer at the “head of the table” etc. This helps me to be present (believe it or not) so that when I am reading, I am reading – books or keyboard, etc. This is about as simplified as I get (so far). Always a work in progress.
Shut off my phone! Judging by how often my wife and daughters get after me for NOT picking up their calls and texts the moment they call, I’m far less connected to my cell phone than most people. But still, there are days when I wish that I had left the phone at home for a host of reasons.
I too have been accused of not
being available by phone and have
bristled at being instantly and
constantly connected.
Don’t get me wrong, I am very
attached to my phone and all that
it can do.
I spent a week in a psych ward a
few years ago, and since we weren’t
allowed to have our phones,
we just sat around talking to each
other all day. I met such amazing
people. Best therapy ever!
My theory is I have made it 66 years without one so I believe I can make it for the remainder of my time without one. Cheryl has another theory though. “You just do not want anyone to know where you are or be bothered.” Hmmmmm, may be a bit of truth there!
Exactly!!!
“I am an old man and have known a great many troubles. most of which never came to pass.” Attributed to Samuel Clemens.
No future tripping. Catastrophizing. Any other adjective to describe being monkey minded. That snake eating its tail worry that brings about the overwhelmed emotion that leads to anxiety for me. This will keep me from being present and has led me back to the dark place of self-medication and active addiction with booze many times in the past. I need to remember to just breathe, take a step back in my mind and breathe in the joy and wonder of just how truly fortunate I have been and be one with the present. It is all I have at each and every moment that I am gifted with another.
Love that quotation. That’s what my mom referred to as “borrowing trouble”. Every once in a while I have to remind myself that I’m creating suffering entirely in my own mind if I’m imagining what might happen, and the stress is just as real as if that event were actually occurring. No need to do that to myself.
Thank you Joseph & Barb. Your reflections this morning really speak to the heart of issues im currently dealing with in my life.
Perfect
Good morning, Joseph. Your reflection is beautiful, tender, and so very real. Thank you.
Ditto!