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The best advice I have ever received is #1-to do all things in the spirit of love. and #2 Have the practice of equanimity in all things. It happens when we let go of control, because we really don’t have control anyway, we just think we do.
Some pithy quotes are coming to mind, but I cannot think of one single aphorism that has made a consistent difference in my life. As others have mentioned, it might be more modeling behavior or being in the presence of people who energize me and provide wisdom.
I have been a member of a women’s community since 1986. We begin our meetings by singing this song “Gathering of women, take your time, go slowly, listen deep inside yourself, simple things are holy.” That refrain comes to me often. I find wisdom and solace in it.
“Simple things are holy.” Love that.
Just being there for someone makes all the difference.
Perfect Don. I really need this one right now. Thank you for your generous attitude, I am sure you have blessed many with it.
I’m anxious to read what others have to say because I have found that sometimes advice is more opinion than it is wisdom. I find it more helpful when someone assists me in seeing my options.
We are bodysoulmindspirit. Every aspect needs nurture and tender loving care.
In light of this I am following my friend’s wise advice and postponing today’s planned gratefulness gathering until I am fully recovered.
Not advice but modeling behavior: my mother’s innate kindness. I was a sarcastic teenager but have become a kind woman and I’m sure I have her to thank for that.
As others have noted, I’ve taken a lot from readings that I wouldn’t label as “advice”.
A counselor for a marriage that didn’t last but that’s not the counselor’s fault said, “You argue like lawyers! You’re each looking for Truth with a capital T. That doesn’t matter. You need to listen to how the other person FEELS about what happened.” I come back to that every so often (possibly not as often as I should)–how others feel matters more than the specific details.
Everyone is too focused on themselves. Nobody really cares.
So why live life thinking about what others might think. Just live fullest, be happiest you ever can be, cherish every moment and create great memories.
Yes, Bevika, some people think they are the center of the Universe. I think that has to do with the aggressive driving these days. Then someone wonderful does a kindness for me or someone else and I am greatly encouraged. There is much encouragement on this site and I am grateful for everyone.
I haven’t had much guidance in my life or been given much traditional advice that I can think of. Sometimes, the advice that has been given, I didn’t understand at the time. It took many years for me to understand.
A friends brother once told me “it’s okay to apologize, even if you think you’re right. How hard is it to say you’re sorry?”
At the time I pushed back. Thinking, if I’m right, I shouldn’t have to apologize. Now, the apology comes first.
This other thing isn’t advice, per se, it’s more of a saying. But it’s helped me a lot.
“The best time to plant a tree, is five years ago”.
“Live a long life but don’t get old.”
Yes Yram. My mother-in-law had a plaques that said old age is not for sissies.
work toward your potential, and in a moment of self-doubt about doing something– say out loud to yourself- I can do hard things like this, then name it; seems all the advice that looks to the good about me/you has been good advice
Rudyard Kipling’s “If” has frequently provided me reinforcing guidance and advice – big difference, not sure. I’ve generally been one who has taken advice but preferred learning through experience.
“Maybe you should try meditating.” ~my youngest sister several years ago, seeing me in a rough place in life. I started a regular practice, and it has made all the difference.
I agree wholly, my practice of meditation each morning has helped my mental sate immensely sunnypatti.
Quote: Enjoy the little things, for one day you will look back and realize they were the Big Things. For me, I have tried to enjoy the smaller moments of spending time with others or nature to enjoy the people and the beauty
I’m grateful to have received lots of great advice. One piece stands out in this moment, “you’re not a victim.”
When I was 18, a friend told me to ‘Judge people on what they DO, rather than what they say.’
The wisdom of this plays out throughout my life.
Maybe we should answer these questions in the morning and see if our answer changes in the evening after we have mulled them over. I think my answer now would be the advice or encouragement anyone ever gave me about getting an education and to continue to learn and grow wisdom and knowledge.
Following the path of gratefulness and living in the present. Meditation and daily practices
The advice or life lesson has been the power of letting go of the past and worries about the future. The prayer of – please Truth make the falseness despair. Keep letting go and let go of all of the falseness has been a life saver.
I can’t think of one piece of advice. It seems that most of the “advice” I received was absorbed, watching the way people I respected lived their lives and watching others for what I should avoid. Then there are all the books that imparted their own nuggets, and conversations with friends. Little by little the experiences and knowledge shaped and molded me, and continue to do so. It’s never too late to turn around if I’m not on a good path or learn something new about how to live life.
Yes Laura, this applies to my life as well.
Love the quotes in books that speak wisdom. I write them down but should go back and read them or better yet use them,
I create quotation pages in my journal where I write down the keepers and highlight each one in a different color. Makes for a colorful page and I can turn back to them and read them again. I’ve been thinking about putting them all into a document and doing some kind of coding around themes but that turns it into work when right now it’s like finding flowers while walking through the woods.
My Uncle introduced me to this idea. When I am in a good/difficult/ confused spot, I will randomly open to a page and a quote will be very helpful. I’m in awe when this happens.
Listen to your heart.
When I was in my early twenties, pushing a shovel flood irrigating a field of young oats in the hot late spring sun, the man I was working for came by with a much older man with him. He was a retired farmer and he spoke to me “Your doing a good job, stick to it. That’s how I got my start..” We now have our own small place and home where we raised our children. I am still pushing a shovel when I irrigate and am grateful for Ralph Hortons advice.
Not this, not this. To practice letting go.
To start meditating. It addressed many aspects, things I may contribute as well as difficult, sometimes very difficult aspects of former behavior and “wrong” ideas and also fixed fears where I had to confront myself with and which had to be sorted out honestly and to let go of, while in the mean time, life offered the opportunity to be there with and for others much deeper than before. It took many years and many tears, but it changed to something where I now begin to feel to be able to contribute more authentically, which seems to be helpful for others on a personal level also. For this, I am deeply grateful, too.
“The mind is not a book, to be opened at will and examined at leisure. The mind is a complex and many layered thing.” —Severus Snape
That sure describes my mind.but not always in a good way. I tend to overthink. I have to have open heart surgery and the worry won’t stop.
I’m sure we will all be sending you healing energy your way … do you have a date for that?
I have a heart catherization next Thursday and I hope that don’t find any more problems. I see the doctor on the 15th and I think they will set a date at that appointment. Thank you Michele. I just can’t seem to find relief for the anxiety. I think it might help a bit if it was at a different time of year given it is Christmas, my birthday, and so many extra things to do.
Rabbit, I”m sure that anyone facing open heart surgery would be having a hard time not worrying. Something that has helped me when facing major medical procedures is to remember that I’m part of the healing team. The doctors and nurses are not doing something to me. They are doing something with me. I, too, am prone to over think things. I’ve found that to be a sign that my mind is in the past or the future and I know that I go there alone because the strength I need is only available in the present moment. Sometimes I have to lie down and do some breath exercises and image myself going with the flow. That settles me down and eases my monkey mind.
Let me share a true story that always brings a smile to my face. Several years ago when I first started understanding my need to control my environment, I was having gall bladder surgery. My mentor had reminded me that I was part of the healing team and so I reminded myself of that fact daily as I awaited the date of the surgery.
When they wheeled me into the operating room, I was wide awake. That had never happened to me before and has never happened since. Usually I was given a shot that made me so groggy I don’t remember being in the operating room at all.
When the doctor walked over to the gurney in his scrubs, mask and gloves, I looked up at him and said, “Before you give me the anesthetic, may I ask a favor?” (You should have seen his face. I doubt that had ever happened to him before.) He said, “Well, okay.” I said, “Can the surgical team gather round me? I want to meet the members of my healing team.” He called everyone over and I got to see their faces and know there names and thank them for being there for me. It calmed me and I think it touched them deeply.
I doubt you will get that opportunity but I do hope and pray that you will remember that you are a member of the healing team. Be kind and be compassionate with yourself one day at a time.
What a lovely story and such good advice. Thank you so much for taking time to type this up for me. I will try to find an opportunity to use it. At least I will be using it in my thoughts. So glad to connect with you here.
I can’t take your worry away but I am with you.
Thank you Yram. I appreciate you here.
If I remember correctly, Mr. Snape was one of the instructors at Hogwarts. Thanks Michele, for the blast to the past when my children were young and I read the books along with them.
yes, I loved, loved, loved those books and movies:)
Heeding a call to ministry.
As a child I was very competitive at school because my parents wanted me to be, it was really stressful so my italian teacher once said to me that it’s okay to not be perfect, that I can’t be perfect, I only can be human.
When I feel things don’t go the way I’ve wanted, I still think at her and her words. I’m so grateful for having her for five years in my life.
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