Human suffering/pain breaks my heart. I work with Medicaid members for my work. I know I am helping the vulnerable population in my state. I also hold Food inequity close to my heart. I try to give in small ways when I can.
The heartfelt and thoughtful outpouring responses today
just blows me away . . .
I didn’t know where to start
in answering the Question,
as so many things break my heart,
including all that has been brought up.
I’ve been feeling the world falling apart,
and it seems
that everyone else
(at least here in this place)
feels it too.
I don’t know really
where to go with it.
We are all so heavy with grief and sorrow . . .
for the world,
for the people and plants,
animals and birds and trees,
the seas and skies,
and the very rock that gives us form
for the planet and what is happening to it,
for our souls,
many of which
are being sucked down the drains
of consumerism and greed.
We seek comfort
over what is right and good . . .
what has happened to us as a people?
We have despoiled our home
at our own peril.
I guess it all boils down to the cry
to ‘keep on keeping on’ . . .
to do our very best
to let the world know that we still love her,
as we do our brothers and sisters,
spread genuine kindness wherever we can
and be grateful
when we can help someone else
to rise above. ♥
The thought of it brings tears to my eyes. So many things come to mind—the suffering and fear that sentient beings experience. Also, any pain born from a failure to communicate, not being seen, and willful ignorance that perpetuates harm. Early wounds, left unhealed, create cycles of hurt, both for the person suffering and for others they encounter. Shame, and the feeling of being trapped without choices, and the paralysis that comes with fear all contribute to profound vulnerability. When those in positions of power act out of selfishness or ignorance, causing harm to those who cannot stand up to their bullying. The injustice, pervasive pain, and vulnerability we all share in these experiences break my heart and deeply move me.
Suzanne, you will never know how helpful your response has been to me this day as I consider how to mediate an ongoing falling apart in my family. Thank you .🩷
Knowing people are suffering breaks my heart. Thinking about people who lost loved ones in tragedies like what happened in NOLA on NYE and the recent plane crashes. Its so sad and truly makes my heart hurt. And then there are people who are suffering from parental trauma that also breaks my heart. I am not a parent, but I cannot imagine having a child and gaslighting and using them to my advantage through their most delicate years and then even into adulthood. Someone close to me is dealing with this now, and while it makes me angry that this “mother” doesn’t think she’s done anything wrong and blames others for everything, knowing my loved one is deeply hurting is heartbreaking.
This moves me in various ways. I cry when I hear about the tragedies, but then I am moved to prayer. And for those I know personally, I offer myself to them as a listener and I pray for them as well. I also am motivated to reach out to my parents more and let them know how much I appreciate them since its such an important relationship at all stages of life.
What breaks my heart?
Everything our new president commands.
The poster child for cruelty and ignorance running our country.
The fact that so many support this man including family members who I dearly love.
What am I missing here?
Also heartbreaking to me is the suffering of children and animals.
Really anyone suffering.
And those who value money and power over kindness
And the trashing of our environment.
The human condition is one of vulnerability
and sadly humans are capable of both inflicting and ignoring great pain
in other beings, both human and animal.
My human vulnerability moves me to imagine myself as the one or the many being the frightened,
terrified, oppressed, unheard, unseen, and unloved, and in great pain.
“Whatever you did for one of these least brothers of mine, you did for me.
Jesus Christ
25: 40
To see my husband suffer from all the affects of the medication meant to prolong his life. And knowing my children (and I) will one day be heartbroken when he’s gone.
Having worked in geriatric healthcare for many years,
I had the opportunity
to participate in many end of life stories.
They are all heartbreaking . . .
many of the people I cared for
spent their last days, months, and years
alone,
except for those of use who saw to their needs.
I know,
dear Carly,
your heartbreak,
but I give you this . . .
you are there for him,
and you are sharing these last precious times with him,
which is the greatest gift
for you both.
You are in my heart
with love . . .
sparrow ♥
Oh, so many things might be the answer. However one specific thing is our culture is mass and over-consumption of unnecessary “stuff” that brings that moment of fleeting happiness. I have read, yet cannot verify this specifically, that 2 of the fasting growing industries in our country are waste management and storage facilities. I understand the need for those industries, however, what this mass consumption is doing to our souls and our Earth is heartbreaking to me. Regarding how this vulnerability moves me is to be a conscious consumer. Reduce, reuse, recycle. And never have an Amazon account!
We recently watched the documentary “Buy Now” which is both heartbreaking and enraging. Mounds of waste. Children picking through those mountains. E-waste dumped out of sight, out of mind. Pretending that plastics are really recycled in a useful way. We shop at a co-op so we can take in glass jars and bottles for refill rather than bringing home yet another plastic jug. That doesn’t stop all waste but we’re doing something rather than nothing. Real solutions are systemic, at the level of laws and regulations, and any hope of those is farther away than ever in the US right now.
Barb, thank you for being a coop member. I am so appreciative of the folks who long ago had the beliefs and values to start our local coop. They offer so many opportunities for reducing our footprint in many ways.
This is a question that that is very personal and I don’t want to answer lightly. It reminds me of how much I and I think we, are used to hardening ourselves in the face of suffering. I often don’t let myself be heartbroken or vulnerable. I spoke to a friend yesterday who is feeling pain over the deportation of families in her area. I feel pain over my niece who has gained so much weight in the past year, maybe due to trauma in childhood caused by my own family truma and pain. Hard to think about.
How do I open myself to be vulnerable in the face of suffering, and still go on with my daily life?
”How do I open myself to be vulnerable in the face of suffering, and still go on with my daily life?”
This would be a good Daily Question in itself,
dear Maeve . . .
long ago
I made a conscious decision to turn away from bitterness,
and although it was very painful,
I kept my broken heart open,
for which I am very grateful now.
I can be vulnerable
without being overwhelmed . . .
it can be a monumental effort,
but it can be done.
I’ve often said,
‘a broken heart is an open heart’,
which I am sure that somebody famous said.
I might add
that an open heart is a compassionate heart as well.
Help where you can,
and in what capacity you can.
Barb has offered some really good insight
that might help guide you.
Doing what we can
is better than doing nothing.
I pray for your broken heart,
dear Maeve
with love . . . ♥
Your last line is such a heartbreaking question in and of itself. This question together with yesterday’s question on refilling our personal well of hope may give part of the answer.
There’s hardening, and there’s being selective about which ones you choose to do something about directly. We can’t all work on everything. We can choose our own priority, like your friend and deportation, and take action in some way, which should lessen some of the heartbreak. (I have to hope she isn’t just saying it’s heartbreaking and not contacting a member of Congress or donating to an immigrant and refugee rights organization or doing whatever is within her own reach.) Then we count on other people whose hearts are breaking in their own particular way to take action on something else we also find heartbreaking. We can’t do everything. We can do something, and that’s more than nothing.
Oh, so many things might be the answer. However one specific thing is our culture’s mass and over-consumption of unnecessary “stuff” that brings that moment of fleeting happiness. I have read, yet cannot verify this specifically, that 2 of the fasting growing industries in our country are waste management and storage facilities. I understand the need for those industries, however, what this mass consumption is doing to our souls and our Earth is heartbreaking to me. Regarding how this vulnerability moves me is to be a conscious consumer. Reduce, reuse, recycle. And never have an Amazon account!
Most recently, AA Flight 5342 flight crash in Washington, DC…. this truly breaks my heart – the video of it is gut wrenching – they were literally so close to landing. I can’t even image those few seconds of horror. So many sad stories of the victims too. There have been many plane crashes on the news now too since this one. My vulnerability is to not let it scare me to fly again… hopefully there will be lessons on these to prevent the same thing from happening again.
In order to clear bad memories, we must be willing to humble ourselves and face our past. This question puts me in the prime position to do that. Long story short. My answer is clearly my past relationships I’ve talked about before here in some past questions concerning a couple women I met from the Minnesota State Academy for the Blind School who happened to be besties; the aggressive and Big Island one.
This vulnerability moves me forward by making me extra grateful for Ngoc. I’m currently in the grade school stage of my healing journey. Not only is my root more stable these days, I have quite a few guy friends that I can share my interests with. I get to do that today going to Vail Place for lunch and meeting up with a couple of them in Aaron and Mike.
We cannot go alone at all. I have my own security team. I name it “Shoc.” It’s Shaq and Loc. This combines my stable root, basketball and football interests, the Lakers, my Loc Angeles Soldiers strong defensive identity, Shaquille O’Neal, and a more traditional way of thinking all into 1.
The way Shoc works is that we have a committee taking on different roles at different times. We focus more on emotional support and well-being. The 2 main animals that represent the Shoc security team are the turtles and butterflies. Turtles are protective while butterflies symbolize social connections. I present myself as: warm, friendly, fun, and simple to make it easier for others to want to be around and help me. No matter how gentle I may be, the firm grip is always there.
I don’t always need to be the driver of my own car. I’ve come to learn that the last thing we want to do when we’re exhausted is to do things our way. It’s like trying to drive drunk. I remember 1 of the Carols talking about how energy can live beyond us. We take turns going through the 2 S groups; Soldiers and social. There’s a lot of Ss: Shaq, soldiers, social, security, strength, safety, and yes, shit.
I have great inner vulnerability. However, my mother-in-law taught me that only immersing myself in my suffering doesn’t help me move forward. So, her teaching uplifted my willingness to help others. Instead of staying in my misfortune, I decided to listen and support people in my Vietnamese community, especially immigrants and those who are in Crisis on the Crisis Text Line. There was a case that I would never forget in my life. I assisted a family in filling out their SSN applications. After they got the SSN cards, they took the bus to see me in the community despite the extremely chilly weather out there. In our culture, giving something to express your gratitude is ordinary. So, the family gave me a bag of cereal which is what they have for their daily meals. I was about to cry when I got the cereal bag. We know that cereals are quite affordable, and we can easily get them on food shelves. But that cereal bag is all that family needed. They have so little but want to thank me for my small help. I was completely touched by their appreciation. It works as a beautiful motivation for me to continue my path of being kind and helpful to someone.
This is such a beautiful story, Ngoc. It says so much about your kindness.
And it says so much about the goodness and gratefulness of this family you helped.
What a beautiful story,
dear Ngoc.
Tears came to my eyes too,
when you told of the family
giving you a bag of cereal . . .
all the more beautiful
because it was given in humility and gratitude. ♥
My Ngoc, I’ve heard the saying from a high school friend in Kaitlin of “Wallow in south piddy.” That’s the same thing our mom is talking about. A saying Sean Coughlin has is “You get what you give.” This is a very fitting 6w7 Team Shoc Slogan from my answer above.
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Human suffering/pain breaks my heart. I work with Medicaid members for my work. I know I am helping the vulnerable population in my state. I also hold Food inequity close to my heart. I try to give in small ways when I can.
Robin Ann, I hold food inequity close to my heart too.
We shouldn’t have people trying to get by on so little in our country.
This breaks my heart.
Thank you for doing this work, Robin. We need people who help and care!
Thanks Barb
So much breaks my heart. I don’t even know where to start.
I just read through all of your responses.
Such a thoughtful and caring group.
So glad I found you all.
I feel the same, Charlie.
The usual dilemmas.
Makes me bark more, moves me in very bad ways.
Do you feel good about this,
Mr. Barksalott? ♥
The heartfelt and thoughtful outpouring responses today
just blows me away . . .
I didn’t know where to start
in answering the Question,
as so many things break my heart,
including all that has been brought up.
I’ve been feeling the world falling apart,
and it seems
that everyone else
(at least here in this place)
feels it too.
I don’t know really
where to go with it.
We are all so heavy with grief and sorrow . . .
for the world,
for the people and plants,
animals and birds and trees,
the seas and skies,
and the very rock that gives us form
for the planet and what is happening to it,
for our souls,
many of which
are being sucked down the drains
of consumerism and greed.
We seek comfort
over what is right and good . . .
what has happened to us as a people?
We have despoiled our home
at our own peril.
I guess it all boils down to the cry
to ‘keep on keeping on’ . . .
to do our very best
to let the world know that we still love her,
as we do our brothers and sisters,
spread genuine kindness wherever we can
and be grateful
when we can help someone else
to rise above. ♥
The thought of it brings tears to my eyes. So many things come to mind—the suffering and fear that sentient beings experience. Also, any pain born from a failure to communicate, not being seen, and willful ignorance that perpetuates harm. Early wounds, left unhealed, create cycles of hurt, both for the person suffering and for others they encounter. Shame, and the feeling of being trapped without choices, and the paralysis that comes with fear all contribute to profound vulnerability. When those in positions of power act out of selfishness or ignorance, causing harm to those who cannot stand up to their bullying. The injustice, pervasive pain, and vulnerability we all share in these experiences break my heart and deeply move me.
You have said so much in just one short paragraph.
Thank you, Suzanne. ♥️
Suzanne, Such powerful words. When will we ever learn?
Suzanne, you will never know how helpful your response has been to me this day as I consider how to mediate an ongoing falling apart in my family. Thank you .🩷
Knowing people are suffering breaks my heart. Thinking about people who lost loved ones in tragedies like what happened in NOLA on NYE and the recent plane crashes. Its so sad and truly makes my heart hurt. And then there are people who are suffering from parental trauma that also breaks my heart. I am not a parent, but I cannot imagine having a child and gaslighting and using them to my advantage through their most delicate years and then even into adulthood. Someone close to me is dealing with this now, and while it makes me angry that this “mother” doesn’t think she’s done anything wrong and blames others for everything, knowing my loved one is deeply hurting is heartbreaking.
This moves me in various ways. I cry when I hear about the tragedies, but then I am moved to prayer. And for those I know personally, I offer myself to them as a listener and I pray for them as well. I also am motivated to reach out to my parents more and let them know how much I appreciate them since its such an important relationship at all stages of life.
What breaks my heart?
Everything our new president commands.
The poster child for cruelty and ignorance running our country.
The fact that so many support this man including family members who I dearly love.
What am I missing here?
Also heartbreaking to me is the suffering of children and animals.
Really anyone suffering.
And those who value money and power over kindness
And the trashing of our environment.
The human condition is one of vulnerability
and sadly humans are capable of both inflicting and ignoring great pain
in other beings, both human and animal.
My human vulnerability moves me to imagine myself as the one or the many being the frightened,
terrified, oppressed, unheard, unseen, and unloved, and in great pain.
“Whatever you did for one of these least brothers of mine, you did for me.
Jesus Christ
25: 40
Thank you for saying this.
Thanks for the acknowledgment, Barb.
I’m always interested in hearing what you have to say.
To see my husband suffer from all the affects of the medication meant to prolong his life. And knowing my children (and I) will one day be heartbroken when he’s gone.
Yes, witnessing diminishment is so tough. You and your children are a blessing to your loved one. We are companions on the journey. You are not alone.
I am so sorry Carly.
Seeing a loved one suffer must be one of the hardest things to endure.
I send you and your family my love.
Having worked in geriatric healthcare for many years,
I had the opportunity
to participate in many end of life stories.
They are all heartbreaking . . .
many of the people I cared for
spent their last days, months, and years
alone,
except for those of use who saw to their needs.
I know,
dear Carly,
your heartbreak,
but I give you this . . .
you are there for him,
and you are sharing these last precious times with him,
which is the greatest gift
for you both.
You are in my heart
with love . . .
sparrow ♥
Thank you, Sparrow
💔
Oh, so many things might be the answer. However one specific thing is our culture is mass and over-consumption of unnecessary “stuff” that brings that moment of fleeting happiness. I have read, yet cannot verify this specifically, that 2 of the fasting growing industries in our country are waste management and storage facilities. I understand the need for those industries, however, what this mass consumption is doing to our souls and our Earth is heartbreaking to me. Regarding how this vulnerability moves me is to be a conscious consumer. Reduce, reuse, recycle. And never have an Amazon account!
We recently watched the documentary “Buy Now” which is both heartbreaking and enraging. Mounds of waste. Children picking through those mountains. E-waste dumped out of sight, out of mind. Pretending that plastics are really recycled in a useful way. We shop at a co-op so we can take in glass jars and bottles for refill rather than bringing home yet another plastic jug. That doesn’t stop all waste but we’re doing something rather than nothing. Real solutions are systemic, at the level of laws and regulations, and any hope of those is farther away than ever in the US right now.
Barb, thank you for being a coop member. I am so appreciative of the folks who long ago had the beliefs and values to start our local coop. They offer so many opportunities for reducing our footprint in many ways.
I feel this deeply too, Mary. 💔
This is a question that that is very personal and I don’t want to answer lightly. It reminds me of how much I and I think we, are used to hardening ourselves in the face of suffering. I often don’t let myself be heartbroken or vulnerable. I spoke to a friend yesterday who is feeling pain over the deportation of families in her area. I feel pain over my niece who has gained so much weight in the past year, maybe due to trauma in childhood caused by my own family truma and pain. Hard to think about.
How do I open myself to be vulnerable in the face of suffering, and still go on with my daily life?
”How do I open myself to be vulnerable in the face of suffering, and still go on with my daily life?”
This would be a good Daily Question in itself,
dear Maeve . . .
long ago
I made a conscious decision to turn away from bitterness,
and although it was very painful,
I kept my broken heart open,
for which I am very grateful now.
I can be vulnerable
without being overwhelmed . . .
it can be a monumental effort,
but it can be done.
I’ve often said,
‘a broken heart is an open heart’,
which I am sure that somebody famous said.
I might add
that an open heart is a compassionate heart as well.
Help where you can,
and in what capacity you can.
Barb has offered some really good insight
that might help guide you.
Doing what we can
is better than doing nothing.
I pray for your broken heart,
dear Maeve
with love . . . ♥
Your last line is such a heartbreaking question in and of itself. This question together with yesterday’s question on refilling our personal well of hope may give part of the answer.
There’s hardening, and there’s being selective about which ones you choose to do something about directly. We can’t all work on everything. We can choose our own priority, like your friend and deportation, and take action in some way, which should lessen some of the heartbreak. (I have to hope she isn’t just saying it’s heartbreaking and not contacting a member of Congress or donating to an immigrant and refugee rights organization or doing whatever is within her own reach.) Then we count on other people whose hearts are breaking in their own particular way to take action on something else we also find heartbreaking. We can’t do everything. We can do something, and that’s more than nothing.
Beautifully said.
Oh, so many things might be the answer. However one specific thing is our culture’s mass and over-consumption of unnecessary “stuff” that brings that moment of fleeting happiness. I have read, yet cannot verify this specifically, that 2 of the fasting growing industries in our country are waste management and storage facilities. I understand the need for those industries, however, what this mass consumption is doing to our souls and our Earth is heartbreaking to me. Regarding how this vulnerability moves me is to be a conscious consumer. Reduce, reuse, recycle. And never have an Amazon account!
Most recently, AA Flight 5342 flight crash in Washington, DC…. this truly breaks my heart – the video of it is gut wrenching – they were literally so close to landing. I can’t even image those few seconds of horror. So many sad stories of the victims too. There have been many plane crashes on the news now too since this one. My vulnerability is to not let it scare me to fly again… hopefully there will be lessons on these to prevent the same thing from happening again.
Many things break my heart. Injustices are truly hurtful.
Accepting and giving help, even the simplest act, can require openness.
In order to clear bad memories, we must be willing to humble ourselves and face our past. This question puts me in the prime position to do that. Long story short. My answer is clearly my past relationships I’ve talked about before here in some past questions concerning a couple women I met from the Minnesota State Academy for the Blind School who happened to be besties; the aggressive and Big Island one.
This vulnerability moves me forward by making me extra grateful for Ngoc. I’m currently in the grade school stage of my healing journey. Not only is my root more stable these days, I have quite a few guy friends that I can share my interests with. I get to do that today going to Vail Place for lunch and meeting up with a couple of them in Aaron and Mike.
We cannot go alone at all. I have my own security team. I name it “Shoc.” It’s Shaq and Loc. This combines my stable root, basketball and football interests, the Lakers, my Loc Angeles Soldiers strong defensive identity, Shaquille O’Neal, and a more traditional way of thinking all into 1.
The way Shoc works is that we have a committee taking on different roles at different times. We focus more on emotional support and well-being. The 2 main animals that represent the Shoc security team are the turtles and butterflies. Turtles are protective while butterflies symbolize social connections. I present myself as: warm, friendly, fun, and simple to make it easier for others to want to be around and help me. No matter how gentle I may be, the firm grip is always there.
I don’t always need to be the driver of my own car. I’ve come to learn that the last thing we want to do when we’re exhausted is to do things our way. It’s like trying to drive drunk. I remember 1 of the Carols talking about how energy can live beyond us. We take turns going through the 2 S groups; Soldiers and social. There’s a lot of Ss: Shaq, soldiers, social, security, strength, safety, and yes, shit.
I have great inner vulnerability. However, my mother-in-law taught me that only immersing myself in my suffering doesn’t help me move forward. So, her teaching uplifted my willingness to help others. Instead of staying in my misfortune, I decided to listen and support people in my Vietnamese community, especially immigrants and those who are in Crisis on the Crisis Text Line. There was a case that I would never forget in my life. I assisted a family in filling out their SSN applications. After they got the SSN cards, they took the bus to see me in the community despite the extremely chilly weather out there. In our culture, giving something to express your gratitude is ordinary. So, the family gave me a bag of cereal which is what they have for their daily meals. I was about to cry when I got the cereal bag. We know that cereals are quite affordable, and we can easily get them on food shelves. But that cereal bag is all that family needed. They have so little but want to thank me for my small help. I was completely touched by their appreciation. It works as a beautiful motivation for me to continue my path of being kind and helpful to someone.
Ngoc, thank you for this touching story. 🩷
Thank you, Ngoc, for that moving, nice and important story.
This is such a beautiful story, Ngoc. It says so much about your kindness.
And it says so much about the goodness and gratefulness of this family you helped.
What a beautiful story,
dear Ngoc.
Tears came to my eyes too,
when you told of the family
giving you a bag of cereal . . .
all the more beautiful
because it was given in humility and gratitude. ♥
My Ngoc, I’ve heard the saying from a high school friend in Kaitlin of “Wallow in south piddy.” That’s the same thing our mom is talking about. A saying Sean Coughlin has is “You get what you give.” This is a very fitting 6w7 Team Shoc Slogan from my answer above.