I kind of believe that every moment has some possibility of glimmer for pleasure or like some kind of appreciation and that part of the journey is like getting your perspective in sync with that — getting your mind subtle enough that you can see that goodness in the moment. But time will tell, I do meditation and what have you as a way of increasing my mind’s subtleness to like see that good in the moment.
Give up on trying to force connections and instead trust that life will present the right people for me at the right time. I have a horrible habit of trying to earn the affections of others who I see potential connections with and often allow them to use me. These connections often end in my trust being betrayed and affecting my self-esteem. When someone shows you who they are, believe them. I need to trust that my intuition and life know best—no matter how many excuses I make for these people, their true nature will always be their nature, and no amount of excuses can change that. I need to trust life when it tells me I deserve better. Because I do
I’m not sure. I try to practice grattitude to remember how life has workd out well for me and to have faith and trust, it is has been hard because that trust was eroded for me, but im trying to reclaijm my narrative. life DOES work out for me. The universe has my back.
This has been a hard one, for me.
The evidence points towards life
being trustworthy. But I still resist.
My mind is filled with negative outcomes
and worst case scenarios. I know it’s a
protective reflex but it’s very limiting.
I am still carrying the raft on my back,
that helped me cross that river.
Its time to put down the raft and proceed
unencumbered.
It means to trust the process. I still have to do my part – set intentions, be grateful, take care of myself body, mind and soul, but also know that there is a power greater than myself that I can rely on.
We’ve had this question before and I have the same reaction: I don’t know that “trust” is the word I would use. I accept life, I live life, I am life as are we all. I trust other people, I trust myself. Trust is a word I associate with human interactions.
Merriam-Webster’s first definition: “assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something.” Second definition: “dependence on something future or contingent : HOPE.”
Do I rely on life’s character and ability? I wouldn’t put it that way. Do I depend on future life? No, because that would mean I took it for granted, when I know nothing is guaranteed. It’s certainly easy to to expect and hope that I’ll still be here tomorrow living life and I wouldn’t want to live every moment in fear of death, so maybe that’s a form of trust. But it’s not like trusting that the bridge I’m about to cross will hold me, or trusting that my husband loves me. The word just doesn’t work well for me.
I share an entry from my 2019 journal that includes an essay by then executive director of gratefulness.org Kristie Nelson.
Morning Meds, May 13 2019 We are Life
There is a short essay below. It is a beautifully written reminder filled with the wisdom of “going with the flow,” of “expecting what you need” not what you think you need; It is a reminder that life is trustworthy. I’ve been in my new home for about two weeks and am learning so much about myself from this experience. As Br. David says in this essay, “Deep trust in life is not a feeling but a stance that you deliberately take. It is the attitude we call courage.” Yes, it’s the attitude of gratitude. As Matthew Fox says in his book “Meditation with Meister Eckhart”
“The Word of God
Is always “In the beginning.”
And this means it is always in the process of being born
And is always already born”
Life is process not product and we are LIFE!
Deepening Our Comfort with Uncertainty
By Kristi Nelson, Executive Director Gratefulness.org
You do not need to know precisely what is happening, or exactly where it is all going. What you need is to recognize the possibilities and challenges offered by the present moment, and to embrace them with courage, faith, and hope.
~ Thomas Merton
I used to put myself to sleep by repeatedly reciting a little mantra that helped me transition from active days to hopes for a calm mind at night: “There is nothing to do, nowhere to go, nothing to know.” Guiding myself into greater comfort with not knowing was always helpful in reassuring my mind that it could truly rest and take a break from trying to plan and figure everything out. It seemed that where my mind could lead, my body would follow, and so I could slip into the sweet embrace of sleep.
There is much to discover that can surprise us, so much to which we can gratefully yield, so much permission to let go of our need to know or control what will happen.
In our daily lives, there are endless forms of uncertainty — far more things we cannot know than know. Objectively, this could be cause for great delight, wonder, and surrender. We could be relieved and appreciative that we do not have to perpetually hold onto the steering wheel, captain the ship, drive our lives. There is much to discover that can surprise us, so much to which we can gratefully yield, so much permission to let go of our need to know or control what will happen. And yet when we experience the presence of true uncertainty in our lives, it can be rattling. It goes against the conditioning most of us have internalized that not knowing is threatening — that it must be hidden or overridden, solved or resolved, as quickly as possible.
For everyone alive now, and for everyone who has ever lived, we are united in the fact that life invites us to show up again and again into mystery. There are no guarantees — only exquisite unknowns. We do not know exactly how or when we will die, and there is no single formula for how best to live. We do not know how life is going to unfold — in the grand scheme and also in its minutiae — and we cannot be in charge of most all of it. This freedom from control can either shrink our perspective to the size of a clinging fist or deliver us readily into the gaze of the cosmos, depending on how we approach life in the moment. Much of our freedom depends on cultivating greater perspective about being with uncertainty, however and whenever we can.
As we meet the uncertain world with grateful and wholehearted presence, our inner life and spiritual life are unfathomably enriched.
When we practice grateful living, we create a welcoming space for the surprise of uncertainty, knowing that it arrives naturally in each of those moments when we truly take nothing for granted. Without expectations, life is one surprising unfolding after another. The exact nature of the surprises that arrive in our lives is not up to us, but the nature of our response to surprise is ours and ours alone. Each time we let go and welcome life instead of holding onto our ideas about it, we receive reinforcement for our willingness to surrender to vastness rather than trying to resist it. The rewards of this shift are ever-available to us and make the risks ever-worthwhile, as they deliver the gifts of greater ease, resilience, and joy. As we meet the uncertain world with a more grateful, trusting presence, our inner life and spiritual life are unfathomably enriched. As Br. David Steindl-Rast says, “Deep trust in life is not a feeling but a stance that you deliberately take. It is the attitude we call courage.”
It seems we could benefit from learning to bring more of the intentions and prayers we use to guide ourselves to sleep at night to help guide us in how to be truly awake to our days. At night, we soften into the impending unknown of sleep by encouraging our minds to be fully in the moment, to let go, to trust, to surrender. Perhaps if we allowed ourselves to remember this practice of release — and that there truly, often is nothing to know — in the fullness of how we live out our days, we might find ourselves more available to life, and life infinitely more available to us.
This question links me to today’s Gospel: “Jesus said to his disciples: “The Kingdom of heaven is like a treasure buried in a field, which a person finds and hides again, and out of joy goes and sells all that he has and buys that field.” (Matthew 13:44).” There are treasures that God gives me in my life. Although I haven’t seen them yet, they’re already there.
My Ngoc, one treasure I see right in front of me is our marriage story knowing each other for 21 days and getting married through word of mouth to put in a nutshell. It’s expected that we were going to have a lot of conflict given that both couples have disabilities and living on opposite sides of the globe for 25yrs. There were points earlier in our marriage where the question was that were we going to last. Here we are. Communication has continued to grow smoothly. It starts and ends with willingness, and we both have that.
It means abandoning myself to the Creator’s Providential care. Every action, all experiences, are being guided by a Power greater then myself. I do the footwork and leave the outcome in God’s hands.
The first thing that jumps to mind is that there will always be plenty of good people out there. Get to know individuals for who they are. There’s always hidden gems out there. This is why I like deeper relationships. It comes back to the idea of quality over quanity.
I have a track record of my voice being received well, because I’ve been known to make others feel comfortable while still giving them what they need to hear. The reality is that no matter how effective our methods may be, there’s always the few who it either just doesn’t work on or just resistent with the ladder I see being the likelier scenario. Inclusivity is commendable, but trying to please everyone all the time is the biggest downside I see. Being a cross between old and new school, this is where I like the former. It took awhile for me to learn to focus on pleasing the majority, because by nature, I don’t want to hurt a fly. Once I shift my focus to pleasing the majority, I’ve noticed that I’m more: authentic, relaxed, socialable, confident, and closer to nature.
Loosening my grip on how I want my life to look like. Relaxing the tension I carry in my body. Softening my gaze when I’m with others. Looking at them in the eye and being present. Not being so afraid to tell the truth.
Jennifer, the part about not being afraid to tell the truth resignates with me the most. One thing I’ve also learned there is that there are times where perfect timing doesn’t exist. For starters, coming from more 2nd hand experience, the situation is important, urgent, and there’s a busier schedule.
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I kind of believe that every moment has some possibility of glimmer for pleasure or like some kind of appreciation and that part of the journey is like getting your perspective in sync with that — getting your mind subtle enough that you can see that goodness in the moment. But time will tell, I do meditation and what have you as a way of increasing my mind’s subtleness to like see that good in the moment.
Give up on trying to force connections and instead trust that life will present the right people for me at the right time. I have a horrible habit of trying to earn the affections of others who I see potential connections with and often allow them to use me. These connections often end in my trust being betrayed and affecting my self-esteem. When someone shows you who they are, believe them. I need to trust that my intuition and life know best—no matter how many excuses I make for these people, their true nature will always be their nature, and no amount of excuses can change that. I need to trust life when it tells me I deserve better. Because I do
I’m not sure. I try to practice grattitude to remember how life has workd out well for me and to have faith and trust, it is has been hard because that trust was eroded for me, but im trying to reclaijm my narrative. life DOES work out for me. The universe has my back.
Have the courage to stop planning my life
What it means to me is trusting in the Good Lord to lead me on the right path with all of my intentions.
This has been a hard one, for me.
The evidence points towards life
being trustworthy. But I still resist.
My mind is filled with negative outcomes
and worst case scenarios. I know it’s a
protective reflex but it’s very limiting.
I am still carrying the raft on my back,
that helped me cross that river.
Its time to put down the raft and proceed
unencumbered.
Charlie, those storms in the high country are memorable for sure.
It means to trust the process. I still have to do my part – set intentions, be grateful, take care of myself body, mind and soul, but also know that there is a power greater than myself that I can rely on.
We’ve had this question before and I have the same reaction: I don’t know that “trust” is the word I would use. I accept life, I live life, I am life as are we all. I trust other people, I trust myself. Trust is a word I associate with human interactions.
Merriam-Webster’s first definition: “assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something.” Second definition: “dependence on something future or contingent : HOPE.”
Do I rely on life’s character and ability? I wouldn’t put it that way. Do I depend on future life? No, because that would mean I took it for granted, when I know nothing is guaranteed. It’s certainly easy to to expect and hope that I’ll still be here tomorrow living life and I wouldn’t want to live every moment in fear of death, so maybe that’s a form of trust. But it’s not like trusting that the bridge I’m about to cross will hold me, or trusting that my husband loves me. The word just doesn’t work well for me.
Trust the process… go with the flow… definitely not my typical daily thought process, though it is a way of being that I strive to achieve.
Trusting life means giving up trying to control things that can’t possibly be controlled.
To relate it to today’s quote, we can trust life (by letting go) but also have hope (a deliberate intention that we can control).
Lauryn, “Trust the process” reminds me of Joel Embiid and the 76ers.
I share an entry from my 2019 journal that includes an essay by then executive director of gratefulness.org Kristie Nelson.
Morning Meds, May 13 2019 We are Life
There is a short essay below. It is a beautifully written reminder filled with the wisdom of “going with the flow,” of “expecting what you need” not what you think you need; It is a reminder that life is trustworthy. I’ve been in my new home for about two weeks and am learning so much about myself from this experience. As Br. David says in this essay, “Deep trust in life is not a feeling but a stance that you deliberately take. It is the attitude we call courage.” Yes, it’s the attitude of gratitude. As Matthew Fox says in his book “Meditation with Meister Eckhart”
“The Word of God
Is always “In the beginning.”
And this means it is always in the process of being born
And is always already born”
Life is process not product and we are LIFE!
Deepening Our Comfort with Uncertainty
By Kristi Nelson, Executive Director Gratefulness.org
You do not need to know precisely what is happening, or exactly where it is all going. What you need is to recognize the possibilities and challenges offered by the present moment, and to embrace them with courage, faith, and hope.
~ Thomas Merton
I used to put myself to sleep by repeatedly reciting a little mantra that helped me transition from active days to hopes for a calm mind at night: “There is nothing to do, nowhere to go, nothing to know.” Guiding myself into greater comfort with not knowing was always helpful in reassuring my mind that it could truly rest and take a break from trying to plan and figure everything out. It seemed that where my mind could lead, my body would follow, and so I could slip into the sweet embrace of sleep.
There is much to discover that can surprise us, so much to which we can gratefully yield, so much permission to let go of our need to know or control what will happen.
In our daily lives, there are endless forms of uncertainty — far more things we cannot know than know. Objectively, this could be cause for great delight, wonder, and surrender. We could be relieved and appreciative that we do not have to perpetually hold onto the steering wheel, captain the ship, drive our lives. There is much to discover that can surprise us, so much to which we can gratefully yield, so much permission to let go of our need to know or control what will happen. And yet when we experience the presence of true uncertainty in our lives, it can be rattling. It goes against the conditioning most of us have internalized that not knowing is threatening — that it must be hidden or overridden, solved or resolved, as quickly as possible.
For everyone alive now, and for everyone who has ever lived, we are united in the fact that life invites us to show up again and again into mystery. There are no guarantees — only exquisite unknowns. We do not know exactly how or when we will die, and there is no single formula for how best to live. We do not know how life is going to unfold — in the grand scheme and also in its minutiae — and we cannot be in charge of most all of it. This freedom from control can either shrink our perspective to the size of a clinging fist or deliver us readily into the gaze of the cosmos, depending on how we approach life in the moment. Much of our freedom depends on cultivating greater perspective about being with uncertainty, however and whenever we can.
As we meet the uncertain world with grateful and wholehearted presence, our inner life and spiritual life are unfathomably enriched.
When we practice grateful living, we create a welcoming space for the surprise of uncertainty, knowing that it arrives naturally in each of those moments when we truly take nothing for granted. Without expectations, life is one surprising unfolding after another. The exact nature of the surprises that arrive in our lives is not up to us, but the nature of our response to surprise is ours and ours alone. Each time we let go and welcome life instead of holding onto our ideas about it, we receive reinforcement for our willingness to surrender to vastness rather than trying to resist it. The rewards of this shift are ever-available to us and make the risks ever-worthwhile, as they deliver the gifts of greater ease, resilience, and joy. As we meet the uncertain world with a more grateful, trusting presence, our inner life and spiritual life are unfathomably enriched. As Br. David Steindl-Rast says, “Deep trust in life is not a feeling but a stance that you deliberately take. It is the attitude we call courage.”
It seems we could benefit from learning to bring more of the intentions and prayers we use to guide ourselves to sleep at night to help guide us in how to be truly awake to our days. At night, we soften into the impending unknown of sleep by encouraging our minds to be fully in the moment, to let go, to trust, to surrender. Perhaps if we allowed ourselves to remember this practice of release — and that there truly, often is nothing to know — in the fullness of how we live out our days, we might find ourselves more available to life, and life infinitely more available to us.
This question links me to today’s Gospel: “Jesus said to his disciples: “The Kingdom of heaven is like a treasure buried in a field, which a person finds and hides again, and out of joy goes and sells all that he has and buys that field.” (Matthew 13:44).” There are treasures that God gives me in my life. Although I haven’t seen them yet, they’re already there.
My Ngoc, one treasure I see right in front of me is our marriage story knowing each other for 21 days and getting married through word of mouth to put in a nutshell. It’s expected that we were going to have a lot of conflict given that both couples have disabilities and living on opposite sides of the globe for 25yrs. There were points earlier in our marriage where the question was that were we going to last. Here we are. Communication has continued to grow smoothly. It starts and ends with willingness, and we both have that.
For me it means stay in the process and don’t get ahead of it.
It means abandoning myself to the Creator’s Providential care. Every action, all experiences, are being guided by a Power greater then myself. I do the footwork and leave the outcome in God’s hands.
The first thing that jumps to mind is that there will always be plenty of good people out there. Get to know individuals for who they are. There’s always hidden gems out there. This is why I like deeper relationships. It comes back to the idea of quality over quanity.
I have a track record of my voice being received well, because I’ve been known to make others feel comfortable while still giving them what they need to hear. The reality is that no matter how effective our methods may be, there’s always the few who it either just doesn’t work on or just resistent with the ladder I see being the likelier scenario. Inclusivity is commendable, but trying to please everyone all the time is the biggest downside I see. Being a cross between old and new school, this is where I like the former. It took awhile for me to learn to focus on pleasing the majority, because by nature, I don’t want to hurt a fly. Once I shift my focus to pleasing the majority, I’ve noticed that I’m more: authentic, relaxed, socialable, confident, and closer to nature.
Loosening my grip on how I want my life to look like. Relaxing the tension I carry in my body. Softening my gaze when I’m with others. Looking at them in the eye and being present. Not being so afraid to tell the truth.
Jennifer, the part about not being afraid to tell the truth resignates with me the most. One thing I’ve also learned there is that there are times where perfect timing doesn’t exist. For starters, coming from more 2nd hand experience, the situation is important, urgent, and there’s a busier schedule.