Reflections

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  1. E
    Ella

    Simply not focusing on the bad parts of every situation, saying to myself ‘oh well’ and moving on with life is a very important skill to have. I need to remind myself that the sadness I’m feeling is only temporary and will eventually pass like it always does.

    4 months ago
  2. A
    Amita

    To see roses with the thorns is like accepting the situations as they are.It is freedom from the pros and cons of the situation. Accept yourself as a mere receiver or rather a perfect receiver who receives abundance and adversity with same intensity. Be grateful for both.
    Both are true and inseparable. Experience Both lively.

    4 months ago
  3. Cathie

    I believe I do see the roses along with the thorn-at least I feel like I do:)

    4 months ago
  4. dragonfly

    If you want to love the rose you have to love it whole, thorns and all. And what goes for the rose goes for everything else.

    4 months ago
  5. Don Jones

    This immense and self-aware emptiness that I find here isn’t just empty. It’s empty-for-filling. Ultimately no-one and nothing is left out. In fact, I’m not well, not quite sane, not ‘all there’, not whole till I’m the Whole. Nor, to put it another way, is the Universe whole while I split it into an observer here and an observed there, into a me-part and a not-me part. To enjoy the Universe as a Universe, and no longer to suffer from it as a Duoverse, I have to be none of it centrally, and all of it peripherally. They are two sides of the coin or roses and thorns.

    4 months ago
  6. d
    db82258

    I reframed the word for today from despite everything, to Because of everything, life is full of beauty and meaning, this little change is all inclusive.

    Sounds simple enough, but it was the journey of a thousand miles for that one little shift.
    I could hear the wheels grinding and then a thousand prayers later, I let go.

    4 months ago
  7. Carol

    The first thing that came to my mind was the song, “The Rose” by Amanda Bloom. Especially pertinent to the mindset I have worked to change are the lyrics that say:

    “…It’s the heart, afraid of breaking
    That never learns to dance
    It’s the dream, afraid of waking
    That never takes the chance
    It’s the one who won’t be taken
    Who cannot seem to give
    And the soul, afraid of dying
    That never learns to live…”

    Fear of failure, a need to control, an inability to let go are some of the major habits of mind that I’ve identified as I’ve grown in self-awareness. I have to challenge them in order to see roses along with the thorns.

    When I feel down and out, a self inventory usually leads to the identification of one of these mindsets and I don’t care how much I grow, they rear their heads from time to time. If I can name the fear, it loses its power. I remind myself often that even when I feel or I am unworthy, I am still of worth. I’ve pasted all the lyrics to the song below in case you want to read them all. The link is to a rendition by Bette Miller https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZFa324V1kgU

    The Rose by Amanda Bloom
    Some say love, it is a river
    That drowns the tender reed
    Some say love, it is a razor
    That leaves your soul to bleed
    Some say love, it is a hunger
    An endless aching need
    I say love, it is a flower
    And you, its only seed
    It’s the heart, afraid of breaking
    That never learns to dance
    It’s the dream, afraid of waking
    That never takes the chance
    It’s the one who won’t be taken
    Who cannot seem to give
    And the soul, afraid of dying
    That never learns to live
    When the night has been too lonely
    And the road has been too long
    And you think that love is only
    For the lucky and the strong
    Just remember in the winter
    Far beneath the bitter snows
    Lies the seed that with the sun’s love
    In the spring becomes the rose

    4 months ago
    1. Michele

      beautiful lyrics and I could hear Bette singing it in my head as I read them.

      4 months ago
    2. Barb C

      This is one of my favorite songs. Thank you for posting it here.

      4 months ago
  8. Hjt

    This week found me reflecting on the thorns of the Pope’s visit. Those were the over crowding of patriarchy in the clergy. Finally the Iqaluit visit was a rose as well as the Pope’s words. Too easy for me to jump on a thorn of criticism. I need to listen and smell the rose of another’s word or gesture! Or reaching out to the needs of another- a rose in disguise!

    4 months ago
  9. KC

    Lots!

    – keep setting, working on and following clear intentions.

    – do whatever is required – to shift my focus and lense to take in, see, honour, appreciate and savour the roses (ie. the bigger picture), and to see, honour and be aware of the thorns as a part of the whole.

    – bring it into the moment, into the body, and out of the mind.

    – keep showing up and practicing gratefulness, including this daily question and community. It is an invaluable gift.

    – keep a fire and keep the faith. Some days it really is about showing up, trusting, seeing, smelling, savouring, taking in, being with and celebrating the roses. (Says her mind, with great hopes that her body will kick in and jump wholeheartedly into the day!)

    With thanks, and best for a beautiful Sunday all!

    KC

    4 months ago
  10. A
    Anita Ward

    Begin with the end in mind. Look past the irritation and focus on the goal.

    4 months ago
  11. Mica

    Manifestation, Javier – that’s what I sometimes experience, to my amazement. The most remarkable being the cat I adopted from a deceased woman down the hall just when I was waiting for my daughter to take me to the Humane Society to adopt a cat. An unexpected benefit is that, if Rudi behaves in some difficult way, I Know he’s the cat I’m supposed to have. I imagine having second thoughts about a Humane Society cat: “Maybe I should have adopted that Other cat”

    4 months ago
    1. Mica

      Adyashanti said his experience was that he’d seek something and then let go of the seeking and it would come. That fits with when I lose something, look for it, give up – and then find it at some point. Yes, some one of these wise people warned also about living with the consequences of getting what you wanted. I forget the details.

      4 months ago
  12. Mica

    Ah, the thorns are all under water in the vase now – I got the first dozen roses of my life last week – ‘Edith Roses’ – in honor of the woman down the hall who died the same day my guinea pig died and had a ragdoll cat – Rudi – who needed adoption, just as my daughter was going to pick me up to take me to the Humane Society to seek a cat!

    4 months ago
    1. Michele

      truly meant to be, amazing.

      4 months ago
  13. Maeve

    This morning I am walking along the rail trail in New Egypt, NJ. The serious “thorns” in so much of our continent is drought. I see it in tulip and sycamore trees as the drop dried leaves, and in the brown lawns everywhere. We desperately need rain.

    The roses are here as well: the cool breeze along the trail coming from the dense wooded areas along the trail. The summer cicadas are beginning their days’ buzzing. We just saw a beautiful green praying-mantis on the trail, and also to my delight, a young fox (a rose) looking at us from the under the aggressive, dense, controling cat brier vines (thorns!)

    4 months ago
    1. KC

      Maeve,

      Thank you so much for naming and honouring both the thorns and roses of your walk.

      4 months ago
  14. Katii

    So many of my thorns are thorns that I fear are going to suddenly appear and prick me hard. So one thing I have to do is to remind myself that I am a terrible fortune-teller, and that maybe, just maybe things will turn out well. Then I can enjoy the roses that are there. The other habit is to widen my gaze when I am focused on a thorn. If someone is irritating me, by widening my gaze, I can usually remind myself that there are things that I do appreciate about that person, and usually they are much more important than the thorn I was focused on. If one door appears to close for me, then it gives me the possibility to walk through another door, and who knows where that will lead. Even with all the fear and uncertainty of the covid lockdowns we had, there were sweet moments when life was simple and a walk outdoors was such a pleasure.

    4 months ago
  15. GR8FULL

    I think the habit of mind that needs to shift is becoming more self aware and learn to control our minds and thinking. When left to it’s own devices, the mind will do, really really well, what it’s designed to do – identify threats and protect us from them. When we intervene in this process and right-size our threats, the roses become more bountiful and we recognize the duality of all things in our universe. I think.

    4 months ago
  16. Marnie Jackson

    When I am anxious – I definitely don’t see the roses as well as the thorns. Unfortunately, my poor husband bears the brunt of my anxiousness. We are working on it by having a once a week appreciation session…..where we have to say 10 things we are thankful for about each other during that week. This feels a bit awkward and silly – but it seems to be another one of life’s lessons that we learned in kindergarten. 🙂

    4 months ago
    1. Patjos

      Always learning. I am glad that you are close enough to come together in this way.

      4 months ago
  17. sunnypatti48317

    I’d like to think that I always see the roses along with the thorns, but I do sometimes need to remind myself that they’re there. This human experience wouldn’t be as perfectly imperfect without both. We need them both to learn how to be our best selves.

    4 months ago
  18. Michele

    That all experiences, both good and bad, have something to learn from.
    btw, I’d like to say Happy birthday to Harry Potter! Those books and movies have much to learn from. 🔮💖🧹🧙‍♀️🐉🐍🦉👻

    4 months ago
  19. Laura

    Expectations of how things – events, people, circumstances – should be, rather than accepting and flowing with the way things are. Expectations narrow my experience. Acceptance opens me up. Then I can notice the sheer abundance of roses.

    4 months ago
  20. Rabbit

    This question is exactly why I came and have stayed on this site. The thorns have just gotten too big. Here there is acknowledgement that there are thorns and that they are alive and grow. They might be aggressive driving, bad news of the world, or issues of old age. But here, also, we learn through reading, sharing and/or taking a class we can “stop and look” to see there are also roses and then “go” to share the roses. My satellite dish was dirty and I had to look at it every morning. My neighbor came and cleaned it for me. All of you have given me encouragement and I have been looking for beauty to post in the Gratitude Lounge. My friend Carol brought me a cute quilt of a rabbit. I am grateful for the roses in my life and for the times that I remember to stop and look for them. I need to do it more often and to remember to share the roses instead of the thorns.

    4 months ago
    1. Patjos

      Thank you for sharing. Be a rose in someone’s garden today 🙂

      4 months ago
      1. Rabbit

        I love your words. We are all beauty and thorns at times too. Thank you Patjos.

        4 months ago
  21. devy

    Realizing that while picking roses, even if we’re careful there always is the chance that we will get pricked.Life has thorns as well as roses and by accepting that focusing on the lessons learned and the benefits of having roses our frame of mind focuses more on what’s happening in the present and remember that the past no longer exists and that we cannot control everything that will happen in the future.

    4 months ago
  22. Mary Pat

    I have read we are more prone to focus on the bad events, rather than the good, so after reading that, I try to spend more time remembering the good things, and let then kind of “sink in”. It takes some effort, but is worth it.

    4 months ago
    1. Mica

      Thanks, Mary Pat – sometimes I remember that all the horrible ‘News’ is ‘news’ because most of us are behaving so well to each other most of the time, so that behavior isn’t ‘New’.

      4 months ago
  23. O.Christina

    To see the roses as well as perceiving the thorns with loving eyes and heart while in the same time being alert towards unexpected stinging, altering a kind of childlike naivety into awareness of this possibility.

    4 months ago
  24. Antoinette

    The habits of self righteousness, judgments, discernment, thoughts or right and wrong and all the things the set made mind world needs to be abandoned in order to see the Truth. I’m so grateful for this precious human life to have the opportunity to let go.

    4 months ago
  25. Christine

    Not mine. but I like to think that way.
    “I’m glad thorns have roses”🥀

    4 months ago
    1. Rabbit

      A change in perspective, great wisdom Christine.

      4 months ago
    2. Mica

      Fun! Thanks, Christine! “Thorns have roses” – I’ll try to remember that and look for them. I see that in trying to help my granddaughters’ former nanny find a job – thorny but a useful people-related learning experience for me and a useful way to spend some of my retirement time 🙂

      4 months ago
  26. Hermann-Josef

    In everything and any Situation something is missing. There is always 95%. There is always perfect imperfection. Mind has a strong tendency to look at the missing 5%. It forgets about the 95% completely though profiting from it. By love we can see the richness and beauty in that what is. Or we include the missing 5% as ourselves. This silence makes it 100%.

    4 months ago
    1. Antoinette

      Lovely 😊 Herman .

      4 months ago
  27. Kevin

    I make it a point to always see the roses, and to smell them too, even as I keep a watchful eye on the thorns.

    4 months ago
    1. Antoinette

      So poetic Kevin! Thank you .

      4 months ago

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