That I don’t have to live up to the expectations that I feel like have been set for me based on my siblings. I feel like it is easy for younger siblings to follow in the footsteps of their older siblings, and I have felt that way most of my life. I am allowed to find my own thing even if it’s not what those around me think I should be doing and thats okay. I don’t have to please everyone around me. I feel like when I start caring more about what people think of me is when I start to not take care of myself.
I recently retired from full-time work (~ 2 months ago). I’ve been rather lazy so far, with no accomplishments worth mentioning for the past 2 months. I’ve realized I am mostly content with that, and have enjoyed the slow paced low stress days so far.
That I am very capable. I grew up not having a whole lot of self confidence and at times it definitely shows especially at work when I am challenged. My coworker of many years recently told me I should be a supervisor. I was flattered but very much ok with not being one at this age in my life!
I have learned that I do not have to work myself in a frenzy to generate new and constructive ideas- that if I take a moment breathe and open up to silence, the same ideas/solutions/thoughts will rise to my consciousness.
I’m a snake who has shed her skin
many times throughout my life,
but I have seldom felt that fresh feeling of new skin
meeting the air
after the old, tight, and torn skin
has been sloughed off . . .
it happens so slowly.
But sometimes
I am rewarded by that slippery new-skin sensation
and when that happens
I know that I am changed,
and in that change
I know I have learned something new about myself.
Certain parts of me
that I have wanted to cultivate
have grown through Practice . . .
perhaps it is that old
“fake it ’til you make it” thing.
In many ways
I’ve become and am becoming what I aspired to be . . .
more patient,
more flexible,
and more open to facing hard truths.
I’m not quite so hard on myself as I was for a very long time,
nor quite the perfectionist . . .
and this is so freeing,
like a cool breeze on my fresh, new skin;
softer,
more sensitive
and more receptive to whatever might come my way.
I like it
and I think I will pay more attention as time goes on,
to the nuances of growing older,
leaning into the Greatness of the Universe
with more pleasure
and less trepidation.
I’m not done yet. ♥
I have learned that I am accepting the fact that I am getting older.
I don’t love it, but I am becoming more accepting.
I still believe that I can grow older and also stay young.
That I am capable of letting go of a teacher and an organization that once had been the biggest source of meaning in my life; life goes on and new sources of meaning and inspiration emerge. That I benefit from being open to many perspectives for inspiration AND never surrendering my own inner intuition and connection with the Divine.
I’ve learned that I’m much more gentle with myself than I used to be. I can laugh when I make mistakes instead of beating myself up mentally. And I’ve learned how to say yes to opportunities that serve my best interest when fear or feelings of unworthiness would have made me say no in the past.
I’ve learned it really is ok to ask for help. My car trip to Illinois a few weeks ago, as challenging as it was, affirmed there are good people who’re willing to help. My old idea of self was I didn’t want to be a “damsel” in distress. Somehow I framed my asks into questions of, ‘would you be willing to provide me with information to an automotive store?, etc’ Responses were positive. Happy Wednesday to all🌻
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I have a sinister ego issue
That I don’t have to live up to the expectations that I feel like have been set for me based on my siblings. I feel like it is easy for younger siblings to follow in the footsteps of their older siblings, and I have felt that way most of my life. I am allowed to find my own thing even if it’s not what those around me think I should be doing and thats okay. I don’t have to please everyone around me. I feel like when I start caring more about what people think of me is when I start to not take care of myself.
I have anxiety and that is okay. Need to relax and work through it and I am not unique in this situation.
I recently retired from full-time work (~ 2 months ago). I’ve been rather lazy so far, with no accomplishments worth mentioning for the past 2 months. I’ve realized I am mostly content with that, and have enjoyed the slow paced low stress days so far.
Enjoy your retirement Brian. I am 56 and counting the years down man 🙂
That I am very capable. I grew up not having a whole lot of self confidence and at times it definitely shows especially at work when I am challenged. My coworker of many years recently told me I should be a supervisor. I was flattered but very much ok with not being one at this age in my life!
I have learned that I do not have to work myself in a frenzy to generate new and constructive ideas- that if I take a moment breathe and open up to silence, the same ideas/solutions/thoughts will rise to my consciousness.
I’m not always as strong as I think I am. Yet sometimes I am stronger than I realize at the time.
I think Winnie the Pooh
said something like this,
dear Deann . . . 🙂
“You’re braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think”
Love this.
I’m a snake who has shed her skin
many times throughout my life,
but I have seldom felt that fresh feeling of new skin
meeting the air
after the old, tight, and torn skin
has been sloughed off . . .
it happens so slowly.
But sometimes
I am rewarded by that slippery new-skin sensation
and when that happens
I know that I am changed,
and in that change
I know I have learned something new about myself.
Certain parts of me
that I have wanted to cultivate
have grown through Practice . . .
perhaps it is that old
“fake it ’til you make it” thing.
In many ways
I’ve become and am becoming what I aspired to be . . .
more patient,
more flexible,
and more open to facing hard truths.
I’m not quite so hard on myself as I was for a very long time,
nor quite the perfectionist . . .
and this is so freeing,
like a cool breeze on my fresh, new skin;
softer,
more sensitive
and more receptive to whatever might come my way.
I like it
and I think I will pay more attention as time goes on,
to the nuances of growing older,
leaning into the Greatness of the Universe
with more pleasure
and less trepidation.
I’m not done yet. ♥
This is inspiring, Sparrow.
I’m happy,
dear Drea,
that you found something meaningful here. ♥
“I’m not done yet”
Yes!
In some ways I’m just getting started!
I often think,
dear Mary,
that we’re all just getting started. ♥
thank you for this.
I hope something in it
spoke to you,
dear Tzori . . . ♥
I have learned that I am accepting the fact that I am getting older.
I don’t love it, but I am becoming more accepting.
I still believe that I can grow older and also stay young.
Absolutely, I’ve known people who stay young while growing older! It comes from the inside.
I believe that as well, Mary 🙂
Young at heart : )
That I may stay calm despite emotional turmoil and despite fear to be able to stay centered and with some faith at least.
That I am capable of letting go of a teacher and an organization that once had been the biggest source of meaning in my life; life goes on and new sources of meaning and inspiration emerge. That I benefit from being open to many perspectives for inspiration AND never surrendering my own inner intuition and connection with the Divine.
It’s hard to let go of something like that. Cheering you on, Elizabeth.
Thank you, Drea ♥️
I’ve learned that I’m much more gentle with myself than I used to be. I can laugh when I make mistakes instead of beating myself up mentally. And I’ve learned how to say yes to opportunities that serve my best interest when fear or feelings of unworthiness would have made me say no in the past.
That I can cry and laugh at the same time – oh grief!
Yes, I think I’ve done that. ☺️
I’ve learned it really is ok to ask for help. My car trip to Illinois a few weeks ago, as challenging as it was, affirmed there are good people who’re willing to help. My old idea of self was I didn’t want to be a “damsel” in distress. Somehow I framed my asks into questions of, ‘would you be willing to provide me with information to an automotive store?, etc’ Responses were positive. Happy Wednesday to all🌻
Death will come for me in one form or another. There’s a lot of stuff that isn’t worth worrying about, knowing that.
What a wonderful perspective,
dear Drea . . . ♥