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WHAT OLD STORIES CAN I RELEASE?
This is a great way to start this Sunday morning. 🙂 Thanks Gratefulness. I can release the old story of “getting my heart broken”. It is inevitable we will love, like, adore or dislike, neglect, etc, we are human beings and have feelings. We act upon these feelings, feelings is not reality. I felt that I was always getting my heart broken however looking back I was living in the moment, and did what served me at that time. If I continue to advise myself that I am getting broken hearted than this is how I am labeling these experiences because of my feeling. Therefore if things don’t work out and I am feeling at a lost , I will not tell myself I am broken heart. Instead I will mark it as an experience rather labeling it as “pain being purposefully inflicted on me”. I’m accepting life for what it is and it is beautiful, it is an experience not a destination.
Sorry I am late on this one. Thank you all for the challenging question and the many thoughtful replies!
The list of old stories I wish to release is long (ugh!). Which ones CAN I release? The ones I bring to awareness, witness, hold with kindness and gently rework and shift to a brand new place – inner and outer (or discard / turf entirely. Yeh!!!!)
I will aim to focus on and release more positive stories, and let go of as many old ones as I can, without unnecessarily burdening others. Will also take Nelson’s and other lead and focus on present and future possibilities.
And on it goes! …
I can release old stories of myself in which I judged myself as bad, weak, shameful, etc. They have restricted my present and distorted by view of myself and my life. I can remember that these experiences cannot “unhappen,” but they can be permitted to exist in the past without allowing them power in the present.
Recently, so many “aha” moments concerning releasing old stories have been uplifting my whole emotional state. The most important story I was able to release with all your support, my dear friends here sharing and with the help of other friends and loved ones is that story of isolation, knowing and feeling from the inside by now that all is a “we”, it can´t be different, it never was and never will be an “I”- story of “I-solation”, no way possible! It needed a long way of painful re-vival first until finally understanding, then letting go was possible.
How can I ever express my gratitude to have had the chance to open a deeply twisted life´s knot with all your support? Please with a deep bow, may I say thank you from my heart to all of you.
I’ve noticed that, sometimes, the voice in my head keeps telling me that I’m an imposter and that I’m not meant to be a minister-that my calling is something greater than I can bear. Maybe releasing that story and telling myself a different story about how much I’ve learned and experienced over the years and how these experiences have prepared me to be a great minister to people.
Don’t be afraid dear Hot Sauce, release the old story, and tell yourself the new one.
I got so many so i guess the thing is to realize that they are just stories and go forward.
All of them .
The exchange between Kevin and Dusty Su below very productively opens up the question of which stories the question is considering, what we mean by releasing them, and what terms should govern their release. – I believe the Judeo-Christian concept of “the truth in love” should enter this conversation. I imagine many of us have believed and repeated stories that were outright lies; stories that, although full of facts, were nonetheless told to cause injury (many political attack ads fit here); stories that, while products of the imagination, nonetheless captured some essential insight about the human condition (many of our best classical myths fit here); and, finally, stories that were both factually correct and were told to promote wholeness and healing in both ourselves and our neighbors. – So when we must figure out whether to believe and then to tell any story we have encountered, there are at least these two considerations: A) Is it essentially true? B) Would its telling be an act of love?
That I can tell myself with belief that I am a write, a storyteller and for me to let go of the old story’s in my mind ,That talk to me all the time telling me I can do this , RELEASE THEM
This is a good question as it was the topic of my journalling this morning. I want to let go of the story that I am too serious and that people won’t like me because I am too serious. The story I want to adopt is that I am good enough exactly as I am….
That’s right! Amen to that!!!
A lot of my sad mother-daughter stories have been released since my mother passed on.
1) That I’m the smartest guy in the room. 2) That I’m the most moral guy in the room. 3) That anybody owes me unqualified loyalty. – I’ve got others.
This is a VERY good question!
I take it to mean releasing those negative stories where we go down the same track, recite the same pain in the same way, when it is only ONE interpretation of an unfortunate event(s).
I have released many, many stories and doubt I would be doing as well as I am emotionally or even functioning if I had not started learning to release old stories I didn’t like! In youth I saw myself as a tragic figure. Others pitied me, and it was true that I had challenges to overcome, there were tragedies, and I had an unusual childhood, but the STORIES tend to obscure the good things that ALSO happened, the LOVE that was there even when it was imperfect, the beautiful events that were also there, and old stories often feature us victims rather than heroes! Stories can be very biased to garner sympathy. They can be formed around feeling sorry for ourselves and persuading others to comfort and pity us. This kind of behavior isn’t self-love. It isn’t ‘just the facts,’ but is… a whopper of an old story and a slippery slope.
This ‘story-effect’ is why today I detest the term, “survivor.” I am not a survivor. I wanted to be and am much more than select and biased experiences. I don’t define myself or describe myself in relation to events over which I never had control. They were not me then, they are not me now. Those events were just temporary environments and experiences. I am not what has happened to me, rather, I am who I choose to be and how I have responded to events and influences. That isn’t a survivor. That is someone who chooses and is a creator.
I have found releasing un-helpful stories and embracing or weaving new ones (still in reality, but reinterpreting and selectively emphasizing facts), is the essence of emotional healing. It is also the essence of repairing relationships that have been in difficulty. It is the essence of writing better stories for us to live from this moment forward..
I still have some old broken records that occasionally play a little eerie music, 🤪🙄 but not often, and usually only prompted by a higher purpose, like if one of my kids or a friend is deeply troubled and if relating where I was then in experiences and state of mind and where I am now might help them get perspective of where they are now, and to see we don’t really have limits of how far they can go and who we become. I have not obliterated or erased the negative facts of my past, but rather realized that the STORIES we weave around facts are fluid. Some old stories are toxic. We can let those go and write new ones! We can all leave our awful first draft as it is and keep reading it, or we can keep rewriting it until it is very satisfying! We can all be heroes in our own stories!
Well, I wrote another book here, that’s for sure! Sorry about that folks! Some questions just hit me that way. If you read this far, thank you, thank you, and I hope you found something helpful in it for yourself. Have a blessed and happy day! ☀
Thanks, Holly – you remind me of how entertaining it is to observe how some of my stories of my past have changed as I age 😜
What a great question to begin my Sunday…I released several lies recently when I went to the mountains and they revolved around letting go of perfectionism, shame, and owning my true belonging to the world, the Divine, and humanity. Today I release the lie that I must be happy all the time and welcome all my emotions!
After reading everyone’s responses, I identify with releasing many of the disempowering old stories that hindered my growth. (I’m turning 40 next month. I’ve been in this process of finishing up this chapter in my life, and preparing to write the next one. So yeah, I’m letting go of the negative stories.)
Meanwhile, a positive story I do want to release to the world going forward: On my vision board, I have plans of opening my own 501(c)3 and creating my own scholarship for young adults in need. I love mentoring this age group in business and entrepreneurship. I’ve learned with this group, behind all the social media and stereotypes of their generation lies a tidal wave of anxiety, depression, stress, and mental health issues. I can’t tell you how many 1:1’s I’ve had where the young adult opens up, and exhales (or even cries) when I say “Be kind to yourself. Trust, you’re doing well. You’re on the right track. Have faith and keep going.”
So the the story I want to release: “[insert student name], I know the world can seem daunting and everyone else’s stories seem so amazing. But let me to tell you a story about this student [insert the same name] and all the things she’s doing well. Chapter 1 …”
Everyone so far has had interesting responses to this question. I especially appreciated Dusty Su’s response to Kevin, saying that she thought this question referred to “the false stories that attack our personhood, our worth, the false conclusions we may have grown up with…” Those are the ones to let go of and never revisit (at least don’t revisit the corrosive power they may have over you…)
But I also like the idea of “releasing a story” out into the world for its positive power. That old hymn about “tell me the old, old story” reminds us of the incredible power of a story told again and again. And our youngest children love to hear a story again and again, don’t they?
We are formed by these stories, for good or for ill. Let go of the ones that cause malformation. Retell those that empower for good.
I’m a bit confused … do I release a good one or a bad one? Actually I want to stay Present and focus on today. Happy Sunday everyone:)
The one where I don’t know how to talk to people beyond a superficial level.
Good one, Maurice!
Life stories weave into a tapestry of bright colors, subtle hues, and different fibers. White satin ribbon once wrapped a precious item is now stained with tears. Gossamer-thin silver and gold threads shout hosannas of joy, even rapture. Stories of sorrow or delight are a part of who I am. I choose not to release any of these narratives; our perspective depends upon where we stand and how we see. If we do not acknowledge our sadness, how will we recognize the joy in the morning?
Thank you, Lee Anne
My mother was a powerful and wonderful storyteller. She could read books in character. She told made up stories that were funny, or scary, or sad. She told stories from her own childhood with great animation – some of which were hilarious, but upon reflection were incredibly sad. And she lived her life out of a self story of shame, abandonment and “less-than”. Because she was so good at storytelling and living her story, I took on much of her story and stories as my own. And it has taken my whole life to disentangle what was hers and what is mine. And the release part is even harder. To release some of those stories is to release her, which I had a hard enough time doing when she died. I loved and still do the gift of storytelling that my sisters and I learned from our mother. We can spin a great yarn.
Every story is a chance for community. Aren’t we lucky!
I was talking with a dear friend a short time ago about some of those things that led us here and some of those things which are emerging about what tomorrow may look like. We both agreed however, the openness to seeing what is and the possibilities that may emerge from what truly is, is the most important thing right now. Perhaps that means, releasing all of them so I am present to what is now. I visualize riding a wave – the focus is 100% here and now.
When I was a little kid, I always thought the word – amen – was something bad. The priest in our church always said at the end of the “Our Father” “deliver us from evil amen”. Later another priest came and read it very differently. Nice slow with the appropriate pause.
Thank you, Christine – my mother heard ‘bless the good with brotherhood’ to mean she wasn’t good, because she only had a sister.
For me as a child it was singing the Doxology–“praise Him all creatures here below.” I heard “praise Him all creatures oh he ho.”
Ha, ha, that’s a great story. Like the witches in heaven from the Lord’s prayer. “Which is in heaven.” Or the hymn about the cross-eyed bear called Gladly. “Gladly the cross I’d bare…”
I agree with Kevin. There are some old stories that are downright funny, while others are not. There are also some family stories, shared through the ages from one generation to the next, that were considered fact that I question. Those I usually say may not be accurate, and down through the years may have been remembered inaccurately. For instance, there is a family story saying my great grandfather could not get a job and was living with his son’s family, and died in his son’s house. The story goes that he was lazy and crazy.
We know now that dementia, probably Alzheimers, is on that side of the family. Since many family members in the past 20 years have been diagnosed with Alzheimers, it is likely my great grandfather was a victim of the disease, and not lazy or crazy. This is a good example of releasing an old story.
Today’s question could be taken too very different ways. Is the question asking, what old stories can I be released from? Or, what old stories can I release so that others may enjoy them? I choose to embrace the latter response.
Thus far, I have enjoyed a rich and meaningful life, with challenges and episodes through the decades that have helped to shape who I am as a person. Some of my own “life journeys,” resulting in stories to tell could be considered joyful in nature, while others, a few by comparison, were unpleasant, costly, but educational in nature that also play a role in who I am as a person. Which old stories I choose to share depends on the moment at hand.
Yes, I suppose we judge what to let go of for all and what we share with others and hold on to ourselves, by the fruit. Good to question and explore them and see if they are true for us in our present incarnation, if they serve us and others. Not meaning reincarnation, but the changes that we go through throughout life. We are very different people at different times. My stories have made me, some have nearly undone me, and they are true ones at that, but ultimately acknowledging them, learning from them, sometimes reframing them has saved me and served me. Some of my worst stories have given me such bridges by which to also beautifully serve others, and they are usually the stories that are the worst. SO, I won’t say good or bad stories. But I think this question may refer to the false stories that attack our personhood, our worth, the false conclusions we may have grown up with.
So, so beautifully and perfectly stated, Dusty Su! I think that the stories in response to today’s question will be varied and rich.
Thank you. Yes, and I think you got the ball rolling as far as not answering this in a somewhat expected manner. Fun!
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