Struggling with anxiety, addicted to bad news and appalled by the ugliness in the world. Maybe this is a chance to find again the kind heart I once had and seem to have shut down. Trying to have this quiet hour here to regain the mystery, magic, joy and peace.
To let go of residues of resentment in order to recenter on essentials my heart longs to go for. Grateful for a flood of work to be done in several areas which require to center as well so that all needs are met not only correctly but as well with concentration, mindfulness and kindness. It is an additional struggle to leave some space for creativity and personal themes right now, which call as well. Sometimes it feels that the day has just not enough hours, like probably many kindred friends may sense. So to dive into all of this is only possible when being alert and as in the moment as much as possible. I am struggling with this also.
I can see many areas that I am experiencing what is referred to as burn out. In short, I don’t feel the motivation to continue doing what is expected or required of me. This is a difficult place to be. But knowing that I am missing that motivation and sense of purpose can help me refocus. It is work, and I don’t know if I have great guidance, but I can still see the possibility for growth.
My current struggle is my daughter’s relapse with drugs and she is 1200 miles away. She has stopped communicating with friends and family for a month now for the first time ever in her 31 years of life. She found one of her friend’s dead and has totally shut down. I know this is difficult and it is my struggle. I am a fighter though so I am not giving up ever and the way I grow is to be part of support groups and read anything I can that may help and keep me calm. That is how I ended up here a month ago. This is causing me anxiety so I find ways to help myself with that. Walking, taking to friends keeping myself busy. Additionally I did get some good news today. My friend was worried he might have cancer but he does not. Thank God! I am also hoping for more good news soon since I have asked for assistance for getting her help and hope it is very soon. Thanks for reading.
My job. I stepped down last June, and they still have leadership expectations of me. I keep telling them to talk to my Team Leader if and when they question me about things that I do not control, but they don’t seem to get it. I stepped down because I didn’t want to be in management anymore. And I don’t get paid a management salary anymore, either, so I wish they would just stop it. I appreciate their confidence in me, but there are things that just are not my responsibility and I’m happy they’re not!
I’m also struggling getting thru my YTT. I started at the beginning of the year and thought I’d be done by now. My job and helping my husband with his business have taken a lot of my time. I have made it about 75% through the course, but I really thought I’d be done by now.
Navigating my mothers illness and my challenging father- which further complicates things. It is offering me many opportunities to grow- from centering love and cherishing moments, to speaking my mind and to letting go of that which I cannot control
That’s the best definition I’ve heard for big anxiety;. It took me many repetitions over weeks …for this breathing to work. https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/324417
I hope you find the right solution for you.
I’ve been dealing with depression for a year now and had been isolating myself from all. Above that I also lost my father 3 months ago, while I was working abroad and the last time we saw each other in person was 4 years ago. He was the only person whom I loved the most and cared about the most. Been struggling financially as well now and within this 3 months time frame, all my relatives and friends have become distant, I’m still going to the job I don’t feel confident about. Every day and every night is a struggle. I’ve never felt this much sadness and loneliness in my entire life. But I know somewhere deep inside this darkness, I will find light. This insuffereable pain has given me a different kind of power.
Welcome Dolma:) Thank you for your heart felt reflection. This site has a wonderful caring community. Sending you peace and calming energy. One day at a time.
Thank you for sharing Dolma, not an easy journey. May you find the power within you, your sacred temple of power. There is lot on your self, may you find the time to heal, to honor what hurts. I send my prayers and blessings to you, may you feel the love of the divine and this community that cares for you a great deal.
When I read this question, I felt like I don’t belong here as I have had a cascade of new health issues this year that no one really needs to hear as everyone has their own issues. Maybe I need to focus more on the second part of the question. Will try to do that today. Growth seems harder at this age.
hmm. Of course you belong. I wasn’t sure if this story would be helpful. So I took the risk, just in case. If it is not, then please ignore and forgive my failings. A roomie while I was in Rehab hospital was suffering, there was nothing to be done to resolve the limitation. Someone who loved her and had spent many years in Christian ministry, wrote a prayer for her. It was the most beautiful prayer. It talked of her specific suffering, the details, asking for help in ways of spirit and more. Even though the problems and worries remained, my roomie felt understood and cared for: was stronger. We are human: there is old age; there is sickness; there is death.; there is compassion and i truly believe you will find it here.
Thank you for sharing Carol. Anxiety is a struggle for sure. How I wish I could conquer it for a better quality of life. Trauma sends me to fight or flight mode every time. As I get older (65) it is getting more intense. I just retired in July, hopefully I will be able to control my environment a bit more. Sending lots of love your way. Blessings for all your contributions to this site.
Ana Maria, It helps me to just accept that it’s part of my process. It’s my initial reaction but does not have to be my response to a given situation. I learned how to do that from a social worker who told me that when she was doing her internship with a practicing psychiatrist, he told her that as a child he was always afraid of the dark and even though psychotherapy during his psychiatric training helped him identify the incident that made him afraid of the dark. He told her that even though he knows the source now, when he is plunged into darkness, his initial reaction is still fear. He accepts that it is part of his process but doesn’t let it own him. Then the fear dissipates. Today, we might call that practicing mindfulness. Mindfulness helps me check in with my mind and my body and settle down when I become anxious. Hope these sharings are helpful to you.
When I can push fear and shame aside, and I attempt the task at hand, with an openness that leaves space for growth, I am rewarded again and again.
Reflection is an Important part of my growth. Without glancing back from where I’ve come from, I can’t appreciate where I have arrived.
Happy Friday everyone. Thank you all for being here and sharing.
Right now physical limitations, a sense of uselessness, and a long relationship with continued issues. What are my opportunities 🤔 to grow. I see to follow an exercise routine with self care, love the heck out of people especially myself and follow my spiritual routine.
Developing my capacity for concentration, mindfulness and effort during meditation has improved my capacity for meditation and hence my mind is more flexible when challenged with the difficulties of life and being more responsive instead of reactive.
Financial struggles are offering me the opportunity to be great ful for what I have and live simple. If I just stop and look there is so much in my life, there are so many resources and connections that don’t cost money. I am thankful for being able to grow because of this struggle. I am also struggling with living and really feeling alive and present, I am looking forward to learning and growing in this area♥️🙏🕯️
Loss….. will show me the strength and courage that I do possess deep inside and will provide great opportunities once I reach the other side…one step at a time.
I’m trying to share and not complain. Recently, there has been a reoccurrence of some intense back pain. I’m trying to figure out what causing it. I do have a medical background. Sitting to meditate is unpleasant. Amazingly, this week my teacher suggested another student lie down to meditate. This is not classically done; it inclines us to sleep. I was grateful to hear his advice. This morning I was able to practice. I was sleepier. But, I’m grateful I can stay on course. On the spiritual path we are the laboratory and we are the scientist.
Oh, Avril – back pain is SUCH a pain. I ‘Velcro myself together’ as I call the lower back support that I sometimes wear 24/7. For me, reaching my arms up as far as I comfortably can has been helpful for reducing my pain. And I’ll start physical therapy next month 🙂 Warm wishes to you 💕
Avril, I have meditated lying down for many years. It was first suggested to me by my physical therapist. It is doable. Best of luck to you and if you occasionally fall asleep, perhaps that is what your body needs.
As I read the replies below my first thoughts about this question was mentioned by several. First my parents 87 and 90 with various health related issues. My wife works in town in healthcare. She is experiencing similar issues as the folks below at work. I listen, try not to fix, offer compassion and love. When she asks me how my day was and I tell her fine, except for the yellowjackets, they really are pissed off creatures in the fall. I am grateful that I work out doors and view my work here at the place a blessing.
A work load that bears down on me Monday through Friday. I have to constantly adjust not only to the volume of the work but also find new ways to keep my mental state on an even keel. I try to feel satisfied with what I can do each day rather than focusing on what I couldn’t get done.
Dealing with the death of my dad and family members is challenging right now.
This is an opportunity to once again, let go.
Emotions and thoughts can be challenging during stressful times. Right now I am growing in being present to whatever is showing up. All we can do is show up and do the best we can, right ?
Being far away from my family in the USA makes me feel lost, but I’m not lost. I’m not alone. Even if that’s what emotions and thoughts say.
I’m currently grappling with work challenges that present much opportunity, much expectation, but much ambiguity – really the type of environment that I tend to gravitate toward, but at the same time causing periodic distress. I fully appreciate that as I respond to the challenge, I grow – will push forward to another day of striving to respond in context of this important reminder.
With my mom in end of life, her Alzheimer Disease symptoms increasing, I have to grow/expand to meet her needs daily. What works one day may not work the next. Sometimes it’s moment by moment.
I am not sure what is happening in my mind as I read and re-read your reflection a few more times and thought about how challenging it is to attend to a parent who is suffering Alzheimers. I’ve learned something about approaching challenges with acceptance, compassion and that acceptance of impermanence is important to creative problem solving.
Thank you for posting.
Yes, indeed, Carol. Thank you for responding. For me it’s kindness, for mom, for myself, for those who deal with us. Then creating moments of joy. Humor is a cornerstone of sanity too.
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Struggling with anxiety, addicted to bad news and appalled by the ugliness in the world. Maybe this is a chance to find again the kind heart I once had and seem to have shut down. Trying to have this quiet hour here to regain the mystery, magic, joy and peace.
To let go of residues of resentment in order to recenter on essentials my heart longs to go for. Grateful for a flood of work to be done in several areas which require to center as well so that all needs are met not only correctly but as well with concentration, mindfulness and kindness. It is an additional struggle to leave some space for creativity and personal themes right now, which call as well. Sometimes it feels that the day has just not enough hours, like probably many kindred friends may sense. So to dive into all of this is only possible when being alert and as in the moment as much as possible. I am struggling with this also.
To let go of residues of resentment in order to recenter on essentials my heart longs to go for. That’s a lovely thought, thank you.
I can see many areas that I am experiencing what is referred to as burn out. In short, I don’t feel the motivation to continue doing what is expected or required of me. This is a difficult place to be. But knowing that I am missing that motivation and sense of purpose can help me refocus. It is work, and I don’t know if I have great guidance, but I can still see the possibility for growth.
Your reflection is the most helpful perspective I’ve ever heard about burn out. thank you.
My current struggle is my daughter’s relapse with drugs and she is 1200 miles away. She has stopped communicating with friends and family for a month now for the first time ever in her 31 years of life. She found one of her friend’s dead and has totally shut down. I know this is difficult and it is my struggle. I am a fighter though so I am not giving up ever and the way I grow is to be part of support groups and read anything I can that may help and keep me calm. That is how I ended up here a month ago. This is causing me anxiety so I find ways to help myself with that. Walking, taking to friends keeping myself busy. Additionally I did get some good news today. My friend was worried he might have cancer but he does not. Thank God! I am also hoping for more good news soon since I have asked for assistance for getting her help and hope it is very soon. Thanks for reading.
My job. I stepped down last June, and they still have leadership expectations of me. I keep telling them to talk to my Team Leader if and when they question me about things that I do not control, but they don’t seem to get it. I stepped down because I didn’t want to be in management anymore. And I don’t get paid a management salary anymore, either, so I wish they would just stop it. I appreciate their confidence in me, but there are things that just are not my responsibility and I’m happy they’re not!
I’m also struggling getting thru my YTT. I started at the beginning of the year and thought I’d be done by now. My job and helping my husband with his business have taken a lot of my time. I have made it about 75% through the course, but I really thought I’d be done by now.
Hang in there sunnypatti, you’re almost finished with it. You’re going at the pace you can… you’ll get there:)
Navigating my mothers illness and my challenging father- which further complicates things. It is offering me many opportunities to grow- from centering love and cherishing moments, to speaking my mind and to letting go of that which I cannot control
Taking responsibility for my part in my struggles, which seem to be tech related but often occur because I’m ignoring the early signs of problems 😒
Like Carol, anxiety.
As big as a mountain, as deep as the sea, it hurts, like something that cuts your breath from within.
That’s the best definition I’ve heard for big anxiety;. It took me many repetitions over weeks …for this breathing to work. https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/324417
I hope you find the right solution for you.
I’ve been dealing with depression for a year now and had been isolating myself from all. Above that I also lost my father 3 months ago, while I was working abroad and the last time we saw each other in person was 4 years ago. He was the only person whom I loved the most and cared about the most. Been struggling financially as well now and within this 3 months time frame, all my relatives and friends have become distant, I’m still going to the job I don’t feel confident about. Every day and every night is a struggle. I’ve never felt this much sadness and loneliness in my entire life. But I know somewhere deep inside this darkness, I will find light. This insuffereable pain has given me a different kind of power.
Thank you everyone for the kind messages. I feel I belong here in this community. I feel home. All my prayers to every kind soul out there. Much love!
Welcome Dolma:) Thank you for your heart felt reflection. This site has a wonderful caring community. Sending you peace and calming energy. One day at a time.
Dear Dolma, maybe you can give yourself big hugs! 🤗🤗Warm wishes to you 😊
Thank you for sharing Dolma, not an easy journey. May you find the power within you, your sacred temple of power. There is lot on your self, may you find the time to heal, to honor what hurts. I send my prayers and blessings to you, may you feel the love of the divine and this community that cares for you a great deal.
Dolma, I really feel for you. I hope you will find comfort and healing by belonging to this community ❤️
When I read this question, I felt like I don’t belong here as I have had a cascade of new health issues this year that no one really needs to hear as everyone has their own issues. Maybe I need to focus more on the second part of the question. Will try to do that today. Growth seems harder at this age.
hmm. Of course you belong. I wasn’t sure if this story would be helpful. So I took the risk, just in case. If it is not, then please ignore and forgive my failings. A roomie while I was in Rehab hospital was suffering, there was nothing to be done to resolve the limitation. Someone who loved her and had spent many years in Christian ministry, wrote a prayer for her. It was the most beautiful prayer. It talked of her specific suffering, the details, asking for help in ways of spirit and more. Even though the problems and worries remained, my roomie felt understood and cared for: was stronger. We are human: there is old age; there is sickness; there is death.; there is compassion and i truly believe you will find it here.
This is a lovely and encouraging story. Thank you sharing it. I will think about it throughout the day. There is healing when one is seen.
Oh dear, Dear Rabbit 😊😘💕
The thing that has always been my biggest struggle is my anxiety. That said, I have no doubt it, too, has offered many opportunities to grow.
Thank you for sharing Carol. Anxiety is a struggle for sure. How I wish I could conquer it for a better quality of life. Trauma sends me to fight or flight mode every time. As I get older (65) it is getting more intense. I just retired in July, hopefully I will be able to control my environment a bit more. Sending lots of love your way. Blessings for all your contributions to this site.
Ana Maria, It helps me to just accept that it’s part of my process. It’s my initial reaction but does not have to be my response to a given situation. I learned how to do that from a social worker who told me that when she was doing her internship with a practicing psychiatrist, he told her that as a child he was always afraid of the dark and even though psychotherapy during his psychiatric training helped him identify the incident that made him afraid of the dark. He told her that even though he knows the source now, when he is plunged into darkness, his initial reaction is still fear. He accepts that it is part of his process but doesn’t let it own him. Then the fear dissipates. Today, we might call that practicing mindfulness. Mindfulness helps me check in with my mind and my body and settle down when I become anxious. Hope these sharings are helpful to you.
When I can push fear and shame aside, and I attempt the task at hand, with an openness that leaves space for growth, I am rewarded again and again.
Reflection is an Important part of my growth. Without glancing back from where I’ve come from, I can’t appreciate where I have arrived.
Happy Friday everyone. Thank you all for being here and sharing.
You too Charlie. ‘Reflection is an Important part of my growth’ resonated with me:)
Right now physical limitations, a sense of uselessness, and a long relationship with continued issues. What are my opportunities 🤔 to grow. I see to follow an exercise routine with self care, love the heck out of people especially myself and follow my spiritual routine.
Sending lots of love your way. Blessings as you do the journey of life.
Developing my capacity for concentration, mindfulness and effort during meditation has improved my capacity for meditation and hence my mind is more flexible when challenged with the difficulties of life and being more responsive instead of reactive.
Financial struggles are offering me the opportunity to be great ful for what I have and live simple. If I just stop and look there is so much in my life, there are so many resources and connections that don’t cost money. I am thankful for being able to grow because of this struggle. I am also struggling with living and really feeling alive and present, I am looking forward to learning and growing in this area♥️🙏🕯️
Loss….. will show me the strength and courage that I do possess deep inside and will provide great opportunities once I reach the other side…one step at a time.
I’m trying to share and not complain. Recently, there has been a reoccurrence of some intense back pain. I’m trying to figure out what causing it. I do have a medical background. Sitting to meditate is unpleasant. Amazingly, this week my teacher suggested another student lie down to meditate. This is not classically done; it inclines us to sleep. I was grateful to hear his advice. This morning I was able to practice. I was sleepier. But, I’m grateful I can stay on course. On the spiritual path we are the laboratory and we are the scientist.
Oh, Avril – back pain is SUCH a pain. I ‘Velcro myself together’ as I call the lower back support that I sometimes wear 24/7. For me, reaching my arms up as far as I comfortably can has been helpful for reducing my pain. And I’ll start physical therapy next month 🙂 Warm wishes to you 💕
Thank you so much
I was in a class where they said you could lie down too. Sometimes sleep is a blessing.
Avril, I have meditated lying down for many years. It was first suggested to me by my physical therapist. It is doable. Best of luck to you and if you occasionally fall asleep, perhaps that is what your body needs.
Amen
As I read the replies below my first thoughts about this question was mentioned by several. First my parents 87 and 90 with various health related issues. My wife works in town in healthcare. She is experiencing similar issues as the folks below at work. I listen, try not to fix, offer compassion and love. When she asks me how my day was and I tell her fine, except for the yellowjackets, they really are pissed off creatures in the fall. I am grateful that I work out doors and view my work here at the place a blessing.
‘the yellowjackets, they really are pissed off creatures in the fall’ – I literally laughed out loud, sooo true
A work load that bears down on me Monday through Friday. I have to constantly adjust not only to the volume of the work but also find new ways to keep my mental state on an even keel. I try to feel satisfied with what I can do each day rather than focusing on what I couldn’t get done.
I like that!
That’s a healthy mindset
Dealing with the death of my dad and family members is challenging right now.
This is an opportunity to once again, let go.
Emotions and thoughts can be challenging during stressful times. Right now I am growing in being present to whatever is showing up. All we can do is show up and do the best we can, right ?
Being far away from my family in the USA makes me feel lost, but I’m not lost. I’m not alone. Even if that’s what emotions and thoughts say.
Thank you for sharing Antoinette
I’m currently grappling with work challenges that present much opportunity, much expectation, but much ambiguity – really the type of environment that I tend to gravitate toward, but at the same time causing periodic distress. I fully appreciate that as I respond to the challenge, I grow – will push forward to another day of striving to respond in context of this important reminder.
Living and coping with physical limitations as I age, and hopefully still finding ways to thrive.
Me too and lots of them all at once.
Kevin, I totally relate!
I hear you Kevin.
Likewise
Lack of exercise and food choices have me growing… need to change my ways and make better choices. TGIF, has been a long stressful week.
With my mom in end of life, her Alzheimer Disease symptoms increasing, I have to grow/expand to meet her needs daily. What works one day may not work the next. Sometimes it’s moment by moment.
I am not sure what is happening in my mind as I read and re-read your reflection a few more times and thought about how challenging it is to attend to a parent who is suffering Alzheimers. I’ve learned something about approaching challenges with acceptance, compassion and that acceptance of impermanence is important to creative problem solving.
Thank you for posting.
Yes, indeed, Carol. Thank you for responding. For me it’s kindness, for mom, for myself, for those who deal with us. Then creating moments of joy. Humor is a cornerstone of sanity too.