Becoming a People of Possibility

These five words have become a common mantra in the face of adversity and disapproval, yielding apathy and inertia: it is what it is. They are wise on one hand and deadening on the other. 

In its wisdom, this mantra acknowledges reality with a humble take. Rather than, this is rubbish, let’s revolt, there is a full-throated awareness of what is. There is power in such awareness because it is grounded in the situation at hand. This can apply to the chronically grouchy neighbor, dysfunctional and unproductive politics, corporate greed and its exploitation of workers and the environment, or a wayward child who just can’t seem to find themself. Rather than denial, we humbly acknowledge the situation without getting carried away with ourselves and thinking that we alone can fix it. In this regard, the mantra shows us our humility and our humanity. 

Humility comes from the Latin humilitas, meaning “grounded or from the earth.” And of course, the word human comes from the Latin humus, also meaning “from the earth.” To be fully human, we need to be grounded, earthly — in reality. This is where the wisdom in this common mantra exists. It is what it is — this is what it is! But here is where its wisdom also falls short.

There exists a liminal space between what is and what can or should be. This space is possibility. It comes from the Latin possibilis, meaning “that can be done.” What can be done is also humble in its nature. It is not far-fetched or far-reaching. It is achievable, but it also is not narrow in its scope.

Most of us were not raised or educated to behave with a heart full of possibility or the humility to recognize that we are future ancients. But the grateful life asks this of us in our interactions, responses, and perceptions.

That which can be is not limited to the present moment. In fact, at its best, it has a long term spirit. This is the space where great responsibility exists. Becoming a people of possibility is a great calling for our society because it invites us to be a people who act with a perspective that is beyond the present moment conditions. A people of possibility, who see beyond themselves, are an intergenerational people. To achieve this virtue, we need to work for generations so far down our lineage that we acknowledge that we are no different from the Greeks, Romans, Mayans, or Zhou Dynasty. We are the ancients. We are the elders of unborn generations who will inherit what we could have done but didn’t. When did your decision-making last have this sort of courage for what is possible? Most of us were not raised or educated to behave with a heart full of possibility or the humility to recognize that we are future ancients. But the grateful life asks this of us in our interactions, responses, and perceptions.

So what does an openness to such possibility look like in daily life and how does it sustain our hope?  

It begins with another key ingredient to hope, which is faith. Not the commonly misunderstood definition of faith, which people think is a matter of beliefs and a competition for who clings to these beliefs with the greatest gusto. But faith that is trust. Br. David Steindl-Rast says that “faith precedes hope.” Why does the heart require this?

A grateful living practice increases our ability to see and interact with the possibilities that are all around us — it opens us to the many paths before us, rather than simply accepting the binary reaction of fear.

The opposite of faith is fear, which is perceived danger. Fear leads to a fight or flight response. That’s only two options. This dualistic reaction distorts our perspective and limits our perceived possibilities. However, daily life seldom only has two paths for perceiving and responding. Hope, which is an attitude of the heart, offers many possible paths. When we alleviate our fears — the contaminants to hope — this is where trust can help birth hope.

A grateful living practice increases our ability to see and interact with the possibilities that are all around us — it opens us to the many paths before us, rather than simply accepting the binary reaction of fear. As a result, our practice helps us discover what is possible in any given moment. With daily practice, we can observe what can and should be done for ourselves and each other, approach the opportunity with humility, and trust that we can discover a path to what is good. Here is where the synergy of gratefulness and hope are at work.

So yes, it is what it is, but just for now.

Photo by Rob Wicks

Joe Primo, Grateful Living

Joe Primo is the CEO of Grateful Living. He is a passionate speaker and community-builder whose accomplishments made him a leading voice on resilience and adversity. Gratefulness for life, he believes, is foundational to discovering meaning and the only response that is big enough and appropriate for the plot twists, delights, surprises, and devastation we encounter along the way. A student of our founder since his studies at Yale Divinity School, Joe is committed to advancing our global movement and making the transformational practice of grateful living both accessible to all and integral to communities and places of belonging. His TED talk, “Grief is Good,” reframed the grief paradigm as a responsive resource. He is the author of “What Do We Tell the Children? Talking to Kids About Death and Dying” and numerous articles.

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